Page 1 of 5 1 2 3 4 5 LastLast
Results 1 to 25 of 110
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    MT
    Posts
    4,022

    Tales of epic grandeur... Maggot of the Year Award

    So, most people missed this story because it happened on a tuesday night back in the beginning of september. And once the deed was done, the thread quickly disappeared, and the topic was only to be spoken of in guised language for the next day or two following.

    Here is the story.

    So back in september someone who I know, who also has 26XX posts, lives in MT and has a polar bear vomiting rainbows as an avatar and happens to be the OP of this thread, sold a very expensive camera lens on Ebay.

    That was too confusing.

    My lens sold on egay monday night, and I received payment. The buyer messages me asking if I could ship the lens overnight, that he was out of town for work and needed the lens. I figured I would help the guy out and get the lens out ASAP. He sent me a prepaid shipping label, I figured it was cool, slapped it on the box, out it went.

    That evening I get a paypal message informing me of fraudulent payment, and to NOT SHIP THE ITEM.

    Fuck.

    Its a school night, I have a math test later that week that I wanted to be studying for, but instead I start making some phone calls. After a chat with UPS, whose help number is incredibly hard to find, my case is deemed non-valid. I didn't actually pay for the shipment, I am not their customer. The package is not being shipped in my name, and I have no right to cancel the transaction.

    Well the next stop is paypal. So I call them up.

    Did you ship to a verified address?
    Well, no, the buyer said he was out of town and gave me a different addy.
    Well, if you didn't ship to a verified address, we won't be held liable.

    Daang. What next? Local PD?

    So I call up the police of the town (greater PDX area) to which the lens is being shipped. The detective will be in in the morning, I will forward this message to him. The lens is scheduled for an early AM drop. Expected before 8AM.

    Sounds promising...

    I am SOL. I have been had. I got screwed over falling for this guys scheme and have noone to blame but myself. I was just trying to help him out.

    I realize that if I start driving right then, I will not make it to Oregon before 8am.

    So I posted on TGR...


    This story will be told in installments. I gotta get to class.
    Last edited by single; 10-27-2010 at 11:02 AM.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    MT
    Posts
    4,022
    I started a thread on TGR looking for help from PDX area mags. I didnt feel like I had any other options at this point, and was going to try to get someone to intercept the package. I had the tracking number, the expected drop time, etc. I looked up the neighborhood/house on google maps and saw that it was actually a pretty decent area.

    People are kinda speculating on the idea, saying stuff like "I hope it works out" or "yer fukt".

    I get a PM from Ape_Natural PM'ed saying he was going to be in the area that next morning, and would be willing to head over to the house and try to intercept. I believe he offered to go out of his way to help me in exchange for some $$ for T-bell. Deal.

    At this point, I really didnt want him to get into a situation where he could get hurt. But if he could avoid altercation, that would be rad to get the lens back. So he informs me that he is going to try to bring one of his bigger friends who was something like 6'5 and "has the ability to be pretty mean."

    Sounds like TGR.

    So that next morning I get a call from a detective at the local police department who was also trying to catch this guy at the drop, because apparently this was not the first scam to use this address. The cop tells me he just missed the package, and that noone was at the residence.

    Oh shit. Wheres ape?

    A little while later, I get a call from Ape that he also missed the drop. He said that there was noone at the house, and no package on the door. Luckily, there was no interaction between Ape and the Cop, as that might have been awkward. I was impressed that the detective had gotten there that quickly.

    So ape calls me, tells me he doesnt know what else to do. He took some photos and was heading out. The detective didnt really have anything too positive to say either.

    At this point, I was out a lens. All was lost, and it was just going to be life experience. Really really shitty life experience.

    So I skipped my morning class, was moping around the house, pretty damn bummed.

    Out of left field I get a call from Ape informing me he got the lens!

    Wha?? FKNA!!!!!!

    I quickly verify the serial# and find out that we have a winner.

    Then he tells me how he got it. Ape, correct me if any of these details are wrong.

    They decided that because they had already gone all the way out to the house, they may as well snoop around a bit to find some more evidence, or a way to get the lens back. They ended up walking around the property pretending to look for their cat, and wander into the backyard, saying something like "here buttermilk, where are you?".

    Through the sliding glass door, they see a package sitting on a table that matches my description. They also see a little kid on a couch watching TV.

    They walk up to the door, open it, sneak behind the kid and grab the lens. Then run out to the car, drive away, and proceed to call me.

    FKNA!

    Yet another reason I stay around here. This place continues to come through for everyone.

    So Ape now has a brand new pair of Moment Night Trains coming to his door, the prize for kicking ass.


    And the best part? Ape was on crutches.



    Some of apes corrections...

    And to clarify a couple of things:

    1) The cats name was biscuit (not a big deal but whatever)

    2) The "kid in question was around 3 years old, sitting at the same kitchen table that the lens was on. He was watching the whole thing go down, but for some crazy ass reason he kept his mouth shut. My friend just walked in and was like, "hey man, what's up" and the kid just sat there and watched the whole thing go down while eating his cereal. The parents were in the house, but I think they were in the shower or something. Needless to say we just hauled ass out of there... And when I say haul ass I'm pretty sure I set some kind of world record for crutch galloping top speed.


    Other than that the details are pretty much right on... I just wish I could've been there to see the confusion when they tried to figure out what the fuck happened to there lens... "I could've sworn I left it right on the kitchen table..." Bitches.
    Last edited by single; 10-28-2010 at 02:40 PM.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    Ventura Highway in the Sunshine
    Posts
    22,429
    In case you haven't figured it out, ebay is not gear swap. While I wouldn't hesitate to do what you did with a known maggot, ebay is a different kettle of fish. There are some pretty talented scam artists working ebay.

    I hope it all turns out well, but I am not holding my breath...good luck.

    I agree it is a constitutional right for Americans to be assholes...its just too bad that so many take the opportunity...
    iscariot

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    the Can-Utardia / LMCC VT
    Posts
    11,494
    I was wondering exactly how this turned out. look forward to chapter 2
    Quote Originally Posted by Hohes View Post
    I couldn't give a fuck, but today I am procrastinating so TGR is my filler.
    Quote Originally Posted by skifishbum View Post
    faceshots are a powerful currency
    get paid

  5. #5
    jgb@etree Guest
    From the thread title, I'm guessing that a local mag was able to step up and retrieve the lens.... Hence the nomination for MOTY.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Location
    east of west
    Posts
    3,017
    Pretty sure it turned out well if I remember correctly. I think this is the story with the happy ending all rolled into one.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Location
    Uptown
    Posts
    6,208
    I hope there won't be any pictures of the happy ending with no "NSFW" tag.
    Living vicariously through myself.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    the Can-Utardia / LMCC VT
    Posts
    11,494
    Quote Originally Posted by bmg97 View Post
    Pretty sure it turned out well if I remember correctly. I think this is the story with the happy ending all rolled into one.
    I know the basics, but I want to here the fun stuff...how long did you scope out the package? ...was perp anywhere around? You said at first the package was already gone, then came back and said situation was all good... late fedex shipment?
    Quote Originally Posted by Hohes View Post
    I couldn't give a fuck, but today I am procrastinating so TGR is my filler.
    Quote Originally Posted by skifishbum View Post
    faceshots are a powerful currency
    get paid

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Terra Firma
    Posts
    1,370
    Can I nominate bmg97 for an "Avatar of the Year" award?

    -edit. What a let-down, no hail of bullets(Thankfully for Ape-dudeness/pal)...
    Last edited by mmmthmtskier; 10-27-2010 at 05:23 PM.
    "this thread is an odd combo of win and fail." -Danno

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    20 steps from the hot tub
    Posts
    3,773
    Unless this story involves a maggot snatching the UPS package off the doorstep of the thief, and fleeing in a hail of bullets, I pass on the movie rights.

    x2 on what were you thinking, but lesson learned.

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    10,048
    Quote Originally Posted by Eldo View Post
    Unless this story involves a maggot snatching the UPS package off the doorstep of the thief, and fleeing in a hail of bullets, I pass on the movie rights.

    x2 on what were you thinking, but lesson learned.
    50% right, and poetic license will get you the other 50%

  12. #12
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Posts
    33,440
    Quote Originally Posted by JimmyCarter View Post
    50% right, and poetic license will get you the other 50%
    True dat. It's possibly even better than Eldo's assumption.

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Nordvand
    Posts
    1,619
    TEASE!

    789
    i wish i never chose that user_name

    Whitedot Freeride

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Location
    93108
    Posts
    2,758
    Wow, a real TGR cliff-hanger...

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    No of SoBo, So of NoBo
    Posts
    2,284
    Quote Originally Posted by mmmthmtskier View Post
    Can I nominate bmg97 for an "Avatar of the Year" award?
    That's exactly what i was thinking. Whenever he (she?) posts, I lose my place in the thread for a few seconds.
    Outlive the bastards - Ed Abbey

  16. #16
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Location
    93108
    Posts
    2,758
    Wow...

    ...what kind of glass was in the box?

  17. #17
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    MT
    Posts
    4,022
    35L

    45678

  18. #18
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    20 steps from the hot tub
    Posts
    3,773

    Talking

    Quote Originally Posted by JimmyCarter View Post
    50% right, and poetic license will get you the other 50%
    Well then!

    I'm already picturing Mel Gibson as the thief, psychotic, of course. His latest head shots look downright crazy. (Or maybe that was a mug shot I saw on TMZ?)

    In any case, someone get my agent on the phone, stat. This calls for lunch.

  19. #19
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Location
    Boulder, CO
    Posts
    2,260
    FKNA! A note to the robber about the kid might scare him straight.

  20. #20
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Location
    Three-O-Three
    Posts
    15,411
    That's insane... and it doesn't surprise me one bit.

    As a lesson to all maggots selling shit on Ebay- make sure the buyer is in a ski town, because otherwise you're not going to have access to this kind of justice.

  21. #21
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    the Can-Utardia / LMCC VT
    Posts
    11,494
    Wow.
    Who was the Kid? ...Any chance it was the actual owners of the house and didn't know what was in the package?
    Quote Originally Posted by Hohes View Post
    I couldn't give a fuck, but today I am procrastinating so TGR is my filler.
    Quote Originally Posted by skifishbum View Post
    faceshots are a powerful currency
    get paid

  22. #22
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Denver, CO
    Posts
    4,321
    Nicely done Ape and props for hooking him up w/ NTs!

  23. #23
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Location
    Eagle County
    Posts
    12,609
    did they ever find Buttermilk?
    ROLL TIDE ROLL

  24. #24
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    MT
    Posts
    4,022
    Quote Originally Posted by montanaskier View Post
    did they ever find Buttermilk?
    yeah, but she didnt handle being shipped very well and we had to put her down.

  25. #25
    jgb@etree Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by single View Post
    So Ape now has a brand new pair of Moment Night Trains coming to his door, the prize for kicking ass.
    FKNA! Good on you for taking care of someone bending over backwards for you.


    And the best part? Ape was on crutches.
    /me bows. You are the fucking MAN, dude

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •