Part 2: Padded Room Special Collection Of Junk That More Than Likely Will Be NSFW

[stuckathuntermtn]

I got y'all beat on tripping in shitty situations. My buddy and I were officers in our Fraternity - he was the president for the semester in question. Ate a very goodly amount of shrooms and were having a ball - warm weather, lots of parties to float around, etc. Guy comes running up to us at one of them telling us Pledge XX has been arrested for pubic intoxication and that as President my buddy had to come to the precinct. We had to go to the cop shop and bail him out. It took over 2 hours ... and both of us had to talk to his parents in Florida on the phone and get yelled at.

That and a little date rape just sounds like your average frat bullshit.

[retirwntm]

I decided it was a good idea to hop a train while taking way too much liquid. Decided it was time to get off in the middle of fuck all nowhere. It took hours to even get anywhere to be able to call someone. It also took a good amount of time to explain where I was. The whole walk was mostly through farm land and I was convinced a cow or farmer was gonna get me.


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[rideit]

And now for something lighter, those wily Swiss...

https://eyeondesign.aiga.org/for-dec...vjiITZlljjygnI

[Viva]

There IS a god.

[Tippster]

There IS a god.

Quite fetching albeit a bit odd now, likely less attractive 10 years from now.

[f2f]

There IS a god.

bonus point: no need for grocery bags. just tuck all your purchases under.

[oftpiste]

There IS a god.

I suspect not so much in her mind....

[Peruvian]

bonus point: no need for grocery bags. just tuck all your purchases under.

She looks like she’s overdue in the milking parlor.

[splat]

Pretty sure I'd invite some friends over..

[grinch]

....

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[Viva]

More Tuesday MILFage. I like this one- in the fucking kitchen where she's supposed to be.

[stuckathuntermtn]

Most of you old fucks have some great stories!

Quite fetching albeit a bit odd now, likely less attractive 10 years from now.

Nah, you can go to the doctor and get them put right back up where they started in an afternoon.

More Tuesday MILFage. I like this one- in the fucking kitchen where she's supposed to be.

She looks like she knows how to give amazing head.

[iceman]

I have one but I'm gonna have to circle back around and write it later, cooking dinner atm. this space reserved.

So I was home from school. Met my friend Tom, we had exactly 10 bucks between us and decided to spend it on weed. Walked the 2 or so miles down to the clocktower in the center of town, where you could aways find weed. Walked because Tom didn't have a car and mine was dead flat on empty, past fumes. As we were getting close to the clocktower we ran into Scott Hall, who tried to sell us 4 hits of windowpane. We declined, saying we only had enough money for weed.

Scott said they'd been in his freezer forever anyways, they probably didn't even work, and he just gave them to us. So we took them. And they really really worked. Like 1 each woulda been plenty. We were lit up. After a while of tripping balls Tom remembered there was a party that night but it was pretty far away. No way would the gas get us there. So we had the brilliant idea to siphon some from somebody. We went back to my house and got some hose and a gas can. We're pretty pleased with how well we're doing at this point, making plans and shit while tripping our asses off.

So we take the hose and the can and start walking around looking for a car parked close to the road. After a while we find one and set to siphoning. Which neither of us had ever tried before. If you really want to get fucked up, smoke a bunch of weed, take 2 hits of good acid, and then suck gas fumes out of a hose as hard as you can about 10 times. You will be fucked up. Trust me on this.

So we can't do it. We're huffing gas and tripping and then we are on the ground crawling around. Then after some period of time we hear a car, and see a spotlight poking around. Fuck! Cops! Run! We both start running into the woods, we run on opposite sides of this big shed and we're crashing through the woods and Tom is yelling "Joe, help me" but he's still running and so am I.

We get out of the woods on the other side at a road. Tom keeps yelling I have to help him and I run over to him and his shoulder is dislocated. When he ran on the other side of the shed he ran straight into a tree and his shoulder popped out. It had happened a bunch of times before, he knew what to do: "Just pull it!" I'm like, no fucking way am I pulling your dislocated arm. But he insisted and finally I do it. "NOT LIKE THAT!!!" he screams. That wasn't a good moment. He tells me to do it again but no way.

I tell him to stay put in the ditch and I'd go get my car and take him to the hospital. Or towards the hospital until we ran out of gas, whichever. So I start running towards my house, but it's far. I can barely walk, never mind run. And I'm tripping and still fucked up from the gas. And then I see this little kid's bike in a driveway, a tiny little bike, and I grab it and start riding, pedaling like a madman, my knees up around my head. And as i ride along here comes the cop. He slows down but doesn't stop for some reason and I keep going.

After a while i get home, get the car and go back to where Tom's still lying in the ditch. I get him in the car and head towards the hospital. Almost immediately the cop is behind me. So I'm having to drive super careful, using my signals, stopping at signs, etc. Meanwhile Tom's lying there moaning.

The cops stay right behind us all the way to the middle of town, and once we get where the citizens can see them working they light us up and pull us over. I don't remember what they said, I just kept saying I needed to get my friend to the hospital. We're standing there, Tom's arm is so out it seems like he could touch the ground without bending, and the one cop decides to cuff Tom. He grabs Tom's arm and Tom screams in pain. I lost my mind for a second and jumped towards that cop to stop him and have my hand on his shoulder when the other one yells and he has his gun in his hand, pointing it at me. Wisely I retreated but now I was yelling at the cop, just losing my shit at the guy for trying to cuff Tom when he was very obviously injured.

The cops confer, apparently decide this isn't going well for them and tell us to get in our car. After a minute the one cop comes to the window and says they'll follow us to the hospital. When we're almost there they suddenly take off. Maybe they got a call, I dunno. But I got Tom to the ER without running out of gas somehow.

Once they took him in to work on him at the hospital I went back out to the car to look for some change to call somebody to come get us, and I found some change, and a couple of SoCo miniatures I didn't know were there, and then I remembered I still had weed, so I called a friend and while he was coming I had a little party by myself in the hospital parking lot.

I hope that kid got his bike back.

[Viva]

ER? You should have taken Tom in for some Oriental massage!

[Mazderati]

...pedaling like a madman, my knees up around my head.

[Tri-Ungulate]

Non-Asian guys with Asian wives that barely speak English is the biggest red flag for complete tool box/incel

Seems they solved the incel part...

Unless they can't afford a mail-order bride in which case they're stuck incelling to internet Full Metal Jacket Love You Long Time fantasies.

[Viva]

..........

[grinch]

....

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[MakersTeleMark]

Well, that is how things go down. I've got many stories as well, but, they all end up in very interesting places. Which could be cool, or not.

Thanks for the bung trim reminder. It probably deserves it's own tool thread. I'm a big trimmer, and quite irish on the hair in certain places, but it is a quarterly function that should be attended to. If only the ears would get the message.

[RootSkier]

All this acid talking about to make me bust into the stash.

[Vt-Freeheel]

Ring the bell or Bang a Gong?

https://www.instagram.com/

[riser4]

Ring the bell or Bang a Gong?

https://www.instagram.com/

I need that in slo-mo.

[Vt-Freeheel]

I need that in slo-mo.

Would be better able to analyze the hits

[SB]

[Viva]

Sweaty Wednesday.