Part 2: Padded Room Special Collection Of Junk That More Than Likely Will Be NSFW

[Viva]

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[k2skier112]

Attachment 337949

Do eyebrow hairs migrate north to the scalp?

[splat]

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Doooooood. lmfao.

[splat]

But didn't the Roundup Benghazi murder hornets raise the "real" USS Eldridge to retrieve hibernating chubacapras?

[KQ]

Someone turned green lights in Spokane into pot leaves

SPOKANE, Wash. — A trickster who has identified themselves as the "Mad Signtist" has turned green lights in North Spokane into pot leaves.

[KQ]

Why can't I add the damn image to that post?

[4matic]

Deleted.

[Viva]

Story Time!

A husband and a wife over their marriage had eight kids. One day the husband notices that their sixth kid, Billy, looks very different from the other seven.

The husband goes to his wife and asks her, “Honey, I noticed that Billy looks different from the other children, did you have an affair?”

The wife starts to break down into tears and nods her head.

The husband, heartbroken, quietly asks his wife, “So who is Billy’s father?”

“You.”





Guy walks in to a bar, sits down at the bar, orders a shot of Jack Daniels.

Downs it, and orders another.

Downs that one, and orders another, and downs it.

Bartender says, "I've seen people drink hard before, but ... wow! Something going on?".

Guy says "Celebrating my first blowjob!".

Bartender says "Well hell, let me buy you another on the house!".

Guy says "Don't bother. If 3 shots doesn't get the taste out of my mouth, neither will 4".



There is an Irish fellow and a Muslim sitting in first class next to each other.

The flight attendant walks up and asks the Irish guy if he wants a drink. He orders a double Jamison on the rocks, she leaves and comes back and gives it to him.

While he is enjoying his drink the flight attendant asks the Muslim if he would like a drink. There is a pause and he gets angry and tells her " I would rather have 100 whores ravage my body before I let alcohol touch my lips"

The flight attendant doesn’t know what to say. The Irish guy breaks the silence and holds out his drink to the flight attendant and exclaims excitedly "Me too, I didn't know I had a choice!"


A family man went turkey hunting late Fall, and bagged one. Just in time for Thanksgiving. Wifey cooked up the bird and it was excellent. But about five hours after dinner, little Billy came running into the living room, and exclaimed, “Mommy, mommy! I was peeing and a BB came out!” She told him not to worry about it.

An hour later, little Joey comes running into the living room, and yells, “Mommy, mommy, I was peeing and a BB came out!” She told Joey not to worry, too, and that everything was okay.

Well, about half an hour after that, little Tommy comes running into the living room, and before he can even say anything, his mom said, “I know, I know, you were peeing and a BB came out.”

Tommy looked confused, and said, “No, I was sitting on the bed jacking off and I shot the dog!”



Three dogs were sitting in vet office. They started talking about why they were there.

First dog says, "I run and bark all day, so my owner is having me fixed."
Second dog: "Well, i keep knocking up neighborhood bitches, so my owner is having me fixed, too."
Third dog: "I saw my owner bending over naked drawing a bath, I got so horny I jumped and nailed her."
"So you are getting fixed, too?"
"No, I am here for a shampoo and a pedicure."



A doctor was showing a new intern around the hospital. They came to a bed and when the doctor opened the curtain they saw a patient furiously masturbating.

The intern was quite shocked. "Oh my God, what is that man doing!"
The doctor replied, "this man has hyperactive testicles. If he doesn't release them regularly they will swell up and explode, killing him."

A few beds later, when the doctor opened the curtain, they saw a nurse giving the patient blowjob.
"Holy shit, what are they doing?"
"It's the same thing, but he has better insurance."



A Native American is at the dentist, about to have a root canal. The dentist approaches with a needle and the Indian asks "What that for?"

"It's for the pain. This will be extremely painful without it."

"Me no need that, me know real pain."

"Oh yeah, when have you known real pain?"

"Me squat down to take dump in woods, wolf trap close on nuts."

"Wow, you have known real pain!"

"No, that not real pain. Real pain come when run out of chain."

[gregL]

Just so much going on here.

Damn, in the confusion it looks like he put on her panties . . .

[Viva]

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[PB]

Blue eyes????

Ok .... how about non-brown? I get lost in all the non-brown varieties.

[PB]

I know. Is it because I'm colour blind (red green)?
But yeah, I was always haunted by those eyes. I remember an article about the lady a number of years back. I think the years (and the place) were not kind to her.

Let's just call her later self "smokey".

[Mustonen]

*nevermind

[byates1]

[k2skier112]

[smartyiak]

......

Athlete ladies are the best.

[Kenny Satch]

Hard to believe the guest have no idea what they are walking into.
I'd love to see an interview where Benedict talks about it to know whether he had no idea.

[byates1]

Hard to believe the guest have no idea what they are walking into.
I'd love to see an interview where Benedict talks about it to know whether he had no idea.

yeah that was early on. check out the blooper reels. still funny either way

[liv2ski]

If you look good enough to be painted by Boris Vallejo, you are on an entirely different level of outstanding physique. Wow!

[byates1]

[JongDoe]

OK, am i the only 12 year old here that couldn't stop laughing at that?

[Kenny Satch]

Love how he can push their buttons and stay in character. Looked like Brad Pitt wanted to punch him.

OK, am i the only 12 year old here that couldn't stop laughing at that?

Did the same.

[JongDoe]

Attachment 337943

I recognize this pic from a book of National Geographic photos that I bought. Dress that peasant up and she could rule the world.

[Ted Striker]

Both Zach Galifianakis and Scott Aukerman claim that the guests weren't warned, but the word got out pretty early on.

Brad Pitt and Sean Penn had an angry vibe, but that might just have been their schtick. Galifianakis said he was a little worried about Penn, but he was apparently totally cool when the camera stopped rolling.

I read in an interview with Aukerman that Bruce Willis kinda freaked everybody out as well.

The blooper roll is great, but Netflix blocked it.

[Jacques Strap]

painted by Boris Vallejo

Ha! So are you a comicbook super dork from the 90s or fantasy paperback super dork from the 80s?