Page 1 of 5 1 2 3 4 5 LastLast
Results 1 to 25 of 122
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Location
    Eagle River Alaska
    Posts
    10,904

    Dear Dumb Bitch I used to date:

    Fuck you, if you can't deal with seeing me, if you can't deal with the fact that I'm fucking awesome, if you can't deal with the fact that I'm nice to you even though you were fucking terrible to me, then you should have thought about that before you fucking dumped me, and you should move the fuck away from me so that you don't live 300 fucking feet from me. You should not go to the bars I like to go to every fucking night and you should not call me and ask why I've got a problem with you. 4 years and you break up with me in a fucking email... Of course I have a fucking problem with you.

    Go FUCK YOURSELF AND GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY LIFE SO I CAN LIVE LIKE A NORMAL PERSON

    [/end blog rant]
    Its not that I suck at spelling, its that I just don't care

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    yurp
    Posts
    2,288
    I suggest nailing her best friend.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Sep 2001
    Location
    Tahoe
    Posts
    3,888
    Fucking norwedgians.


  4. #4
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    base of the Bush
    Posts
    10,757
    Forward this rant to Her
    www.apriliaforum.com

    "If the road You followed brought you to this,of what use was the road"?

    "I have no idea what I am talking about but would be happy to share my biased opinions as fact on the matter. "
    Ottime

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Montana
    Posts
    851
    Your blog posts are making the baby jesus cry.


    Seriously.

    On second thought, you should have your own reality show airing right after Jersey Shore.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    STL
    Posts
    8,508
    Its hard to see it right now but she just did you the favor of a lifetime.

    4 yrs? Go buy yourself some new gear. You caught a safe! and you dont know it.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Too Far South
    Posts
    5,274
    I'm reserving space in what will surely be a 10+ page thread

    and nail her friend in der poopenhausen
    For sure, you have to be lost to find a place that can't be found, elseways everyone would know where it was

  8. #8
    LittleYellowFriend Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by ak_powder_monkey View Post
    Fuck you, if you can't deal with seeing me, if you can't deal with the fact that I'm fucking awesome,
    Hahaha... you are soooooo awesome... lol!!!

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    Fort Collins, Co
    Posts
    315
    She did you a favor. Live free, screw her friend, ski until your legs fall off.
    "No avy training but I've watched K2 so many times I think I know what to look for." -JoeStrummer

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Under the bridge
    Posts
    2,549
    Nice sonnet
    Quote Originally Posted by Skidog View Post
    Pics including altimeter reading or it didnt happen.

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    SW Ohio
    Posts
    359
    Useless without pics.

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    WHEREAS,
    Posts
    13,001
    Quote Originally Posted by Roo View Post
    I don't think I've ever seen mental illness so faithfully rendered in html.

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Posts
    2,149
    ^^^^^
    Quality shit, right there.

  14. #14
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    soaring on the shitwinds
    Posts
    7,308
    This is gonna be awesome...
    "If you limit your choices only to what seems possible or reasonable, you disconnect yourself from what you truly want, and all that is left is a compromise." -Robert Fritz

    Quote Originally Posted by skifishbum View Post
    not enough nun fisters in that community

  15. #15
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    soaring on the shitwinds
    Posts
    7,308
    This is gonna be awesome even if I don't get it.
    "If you limit your choices only to what seems possible or reasonable, you disconnect yourself from what you truly want, and all that is left is a compromise." -Robert Fritz

    Quote Originally Posted by skifishbum View Post
    not enough nun fisters in that community

  16. #16
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Bozeman, MT
    Posts
    2,409
    Quote Originally Posted by Cono Este View Post
    Its hard to see it right now but she just did you the favor of a lifetime.

    4 yrs? Go buy yourself some new gear. You caught a safe! and you dont know it.
    Yep.


    12345

  17. #17
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Posts
    1,209
    If your having girl problems I feel bad for you son
    I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one


    I got the rap patrol on the gat patrol
    Foes that wanna make sure my casket's closed
    Rap critics that say he's "Money Cash Hoes"
    I'm from the hood stupid what type of facts are those
    If you grew up with holes in your zapitos
    You'd celebrate the minute you was having doe
    I'm like fuck critics you can kiss my whole asshole
    If you don't like my lyrics you can press fast forward
    Got beef with radio if I don't play they show
    They don't play my hits well I don't give a shit SO
    Rap mags try and use my black ass
    So advertisers can give em more cash for ads...fuckers
    I don't know what you take me as
    or understand the intelligence that Jay-Z has
    I'm from rags to ritches nigga I ain't dumb
    I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one
    Hit me


    99 Problems but a bitch ain't one
    If you having girl problems I feel bad for you son
    I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one
    Hit me


    The year is '94 and in my trunk is raw
    In my rear view mirror is the mother fucking law
    I got two choices yall pull over the car or
    bounce on the double put the pedal to the floor
    Now I ain't trying to see no highway chase with jake
    Plus I got a few dollars I can fight the case
    So I...pull over to the side of the road
    And I heard "Son do you know why I'm stopping you for?"
    Cause I'm young and I'm black and my hats real low
    Do I look like a mind reader sir, I don't know
    Am I under arrest or should I guess some mo?
    "Well you was doing fifty five in a fifty four"
    "License and registration and step out of the car"
    "Are you carrying a weapon on you I know alot of you are"
    I ain't stepping out of shit all my papers legit
    "Do you mind if I look round the car a little bit?"
    Well my glove compartment is locked so is the trunk and the back
    And I know my rights so you gon' need a warrent for that
    "Aren't you sharp as a tack are some type of lawyer or something?"
    "Or somebody important or something?"
    Nah I ain't pass the bar but I know a little bit
    Enough that you won't illegally search my shit
    "Well see how smart you are when the K-9's come"
    I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one
    Hit me

    99 Problems but a bitch ain't one
    If you having girl problems I feel bad for you son
    I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one
    Hit me

    Now once upon a time not too long ago
    A nigga like myself had to strong arm a hoe
    This is not a hoe in the sense of having a pussy
    But a pussy having no God Damn sense, try and push me
    I tried to ignore him and talk to the Lord
    Pray for him, cause some fools just love to perform
    You know the type loud as a motor bike
    But wouldn't bust a grape in a fruit fight
    The only thing that's gonna happen is i'mma get to clapping
    He and his boys gon' be yapping to the captain
    And there I go trapped in the kit kat again
    Back through the system with the riff raff again
    Fiends on the floor scratching again
    Paparazzi's with they cameras snapping them
    D.A. tred to give the nigga the shaft again
    Half-a-mil for bail cause I'm African
    All because this fool was horrasin them
    Trying to play the boy like hes saccarin
    But ain't nothing sweet 'bout how I hold my gun
    I got 99 problems but being a bitch ain't one
    Hit me

  18. #18
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Da Siskiyous
    Posts
    1,335
    Quote Originally Posted by Vt-Freeheel View Post
    Forward this rant to Her
    x2.

    or record it and loop it at said bar. then nail her best friend. or littleyellowfriend.

    idfk
    Collectively enlightened since 2008.
    Eddie would go.

  19. #19
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    fuck Grouse
    Posts
    1,772
    i came here expecting boobies

    i leave disappointed
    holy fucking shitballs

  20. #20
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Posts
    2,894
    Quote Originally Posted by ak_powder_monkey View Post
    GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY LIFE SO I CAN LIVE LIKE A NORMAL PERSON
    I think this part is going to be the toughie.
    "Nothing is funnier than Hitler." - Smokey McPole

  21. #21
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Calgary/Golden
    Posts
    5,532
    This thread is useless without pics.
    It doesn't matter if you're a king or a little street sweeper...
    ...sooner or later you'll dance with the reaper
    -Death

    Kaz is my co-pilot

  22. #22
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    New Hampshire
    Posts
    4,113
    At least she taught you how to spell.

  23. #23
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    MA
    Posts
    6,002
    Quote Originally Posted by Caucasian Asian View Post
    This thread is useless without pics.
    Thats where Rontele came in handy
    Decisions Decisions

  24. #24
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    New Hampshire
    Posts
    4,113
    Quote Originally Posted by Caucasian Asian View Post
    This thread is useless without pics.

  25. #25
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    WHEREAS,
    Posts
    13,001
    Quote Originally Posted by Caucasian Asian View Post
    This thread is useless without pics.
    Quote Originally Posted by Roo View Post
    I don't think I've ever seen mental illness so faithfully rendered in html.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •