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  1. #151
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Posts
    606
    Quote Originally Posted by teledave
    Well I think Max should go have sex with a fat chick so that he will know whether or not he needs to be skiing on fat skis. Pics are NOT encouraged however.

    And to think I almost changed my sig about two days ago.
    "Whoever said skiing on fat skis is like having sex with a fat chick, has obviously never had sex with a fat chick." -Jack Handy

  2. #152
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Under the bridge, down by the river
    Posts
    4,864
    Quote Originally Posted by crashnburn'd
    so you shat outside and then wiped your ass with a really large sock... No one cares

    Is that any worse than shatting outside and wiping your ass with a shirt?

  3. #153
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    the Quagmire
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    4,222

    Angry

    I never said it was a bad thing. Two things though:

    1. The blacktop appears to indicate it happening in a public place
    2. No pictures of the shirt were taken

  4. #154
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Under the bridge, down by the river
    Posts
    4,864
    Quote Originally Posted by crashnburn'd
    I never said it was a bad thing. Two things though:

    1. The blacktop appears to indicate it happening in a public place
    2. No pictures of the shirt were taken
    See, I saw that sock and just thought he had run through the mud.

    And after all that effort, we still had to walk down.

  5. #155
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    LV-426
    Posts
    21,126

    Arrow Here's what to do...

    Max- you should give the skis to me. Easy come, easy go. You don't need them. There's no powder in Louisiana. (Powdered sugar doesn't count.) (Powdered cocaine doesn't count.) It snows where I live. (Frozen water not cocaine.) I will ski the skis. I'll even pay shipping charges. And I won't tell anyone at Powder Magazine that you gave the skis to me. It'll all be OK in the end. Just hand them over. Gently now - don't scratch them. That's it. Good.

    Also, I'll contribute to the 201cm Stockli's you need. I'll get you a whole lot of skis. Some Olin, Pre, RD, Blizzards... you name it, you got it. I'll even get you some Geze bindings (those are rare now) to go with your new skis.

    C'mon... ship me the skis. You know you'll feel better about it if you do. Don't sell them. Don't give them to anyone else. Just hand them over.

    Thanks Max. I knew you could do it.

  6. #156
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Location
    Fort Collins
    Posts
    2,042
    At this point, the skis don't even matter anymore. This thread is fuckin' funny.
    "I smell varmint puntang."

  7. #157
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    the Quagmire
    Posts
    4,222
    Quote Originally Posted by CantDog
    And after all that effort, we still had to walk down.
    The worst part of the day was when I cleaned out my pack and found a whole package of cleanex (sp?)....

  8. #158
    Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Location
    Aspen, CO
    Posts
    2,133
    Shit, Max, come to think of it, I could give you a pair of hardly touched Rossignol XX's, which would be the perfect compliment to your park set-up.

    Where would my week be without this thread?
    "When restraint and courtesy are added to strength, the latter becomes irresistible."
    Mohandas Gandhi

  9. #159
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    写道
    Posts
    13,434
    Quote Originally Posted by CantDog
    Is that any worse than shatting outside and wiping your ass with a shirt?
    I did that once.

    Summer of 91, the day after the El Dorado 50 miler in the Sierras (Cody Meadows, a few miles south of Hwy 50, near Strawberry). I wanted to do a quick run before driving back to Los Angeles and took only a couple bottles of water with me. I didn't think to bring TP since I had already taken a dump earlier that morning. I guess I must have eaten a lot after the race because, maybe, 30 minutes into the run, I had to unload bigtime. No way I was going to hold this one in, especially as I knew I had about another hour to run. At least I was wearing a tee shirt. Normally on such a sunny day, I would have gone without.

    No, I didn't put the shirt back on.
    Daniel Ortega eats here.

  10. #160
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Emulating the ocean's sound
    Posts
    7,008
    Quote Originally Posted by Viva
    No, I didn't put the shirt back on.

    but did you pack it out??

    yuck.

    river stones, thats the goods.

  11. #161
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    写道
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    13,434
    Yeah, I was able to roll it up "insideout" and carry it out.
    Daniel Ortega eats here.

  12. #162
    Join Date
    Apr 2003
    Location
    Nowhere near Boner City
    Posts
    1,135
    This thread has gone to

















    shit

  13. #163
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Emulating the ocean's sound
    Posts
    7,008
    i repeat, yuck.

  14. #164
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Posts
    606
    Next story on the tuckermax.com website:

    tucker MAX (minus the tucker) visits the Teton Gravity Research message boards, hilarity ensues
    "Whoever said skiing on fat skis is like having sex with a fat chick, has obviously never had sex with a fat chick." -Jack Handy

  15. #165
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    the Quagmire
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    4,222
    See Cant... It's not like that hasn't happened before. At least I didn't pack it up and bring it back. That would have just been plain gross.

  16. #166
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    Louisiana
    Posts
    11
    You brought it back? ewwwww

  17. #167
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    not far from snowbird
    Posts
    2,244
    it was only a matter of time. i'm suprised it took this long for someone to adopt a new alias.

  18. #168
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    Front Range Bitch...
    Posts
    590
    $350???????
    Tact is for those not witty enough to be sarcastic...

  19. #169
    Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Location
    Hood River
    Posts
    550
    Should I sell 'em, huh Spike? Huh?

  20. #170
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    Slut Lake City
    Posts
    7,785
    Quote Originally Posted by AltaPowderDaze
    i'm suprised it took this long for someone to adopt a new alias.
    And they're wasting it by being completely predictable. Sad.

  21. #171
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Whistler, B.C. (almost)
    Posts
    1,272
    You're gonna love the skis, Max. I skied some 175 PRs for 2 years. Now, they're absolutely trashed... but they lasted me a winter and a summer of abuse, and then they were fucked. And then I skied them another winter, and another summer, and now they're dangerous. But the point is, I had a great time on them. Sort of. Hey, maybe they made them better now...

    Seriously though... I landed a lot of 'firsts' on those skis, and they took me to the next level. They are a really forgiving ski. You'll like them. Just remember: keep your feet apart. It's tempting to keep your feet together and swivel at the hips, but don't do it. It looks stupid.

  22. #172
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Location
    verbier, milan, isla de pascua
    Posts
    4,806
    Quote Originally Posted by phUnk
    And they're wasting it by being completely predictable. Sad.
    this might be less predictable: Max's OK with math (or at least he was quite good in 98-99)
    congratulations, Max.
    http://www.mathleague.com/reports/19...de678/AL_6.HTM

  23. #173
    Join Date
    Nov 2003
    Location
    out on a limb
    Posts
    466
    Quote Originally Posted by Samwich
    It's tempting to keep your feet together and swivel at the hips, but don't do it. It looks stupid.
    The most important advice to come out of this thread.

    damn it I wasn't going to post in this thread

  24. #174
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Posts
    1,107
    aaaaaaaaaa

  25. #175
    Join Date
    Sep 2001
    Location
    The Cone of Uncertainty
    Posts
    49,306
    invisible ink!

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