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  1. #51
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    Jun 2007
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    Snowboarders especially should verbally destroy any snowboarders you see sideslipping any decent lines.
    Buddy of mine is a sick boarder & I've seen him do exactly this out east in the trees on Jay. Boarders can learn how to fishtail in trees & it's beautiful, but so many boarders seem to gleefully head into terrain that they can't do anything in but slide down on their asses. Side-steppin' on skis ain't nothin' on an asswipe. You CLEAN that chute out, mothafucka'. Down to the bone rock ice of the core mountain. Right on brah'. Drag them knuckles. I'm impressed.

    Alright, enough of this shit .. time to get outta here.

  2. #52
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    Oct 2002
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    Quote Originally Posted by BlurredElevens View Post
    Don't forget he skis for Praxis.
    More of a liability than a selling point?
    I'll let you be the judge.
    My friend makes skis. I ski on them. Bigger opportunities have come and gone, but I love where I'm at. What would you suggest, Soul Skier?


    Quote Originally Posted by RootSkier View Post
    Now give me my $20 back or at least write me a personal thank you, you fuckhead.....

    Fuck you you stupid fuckhat who took money from maggots to go be a "professional skier". No seriously, I think I donated $20 to that cause. I must have been drunker than I am now.

    FUCK YOU you spoiled FUCKFACE.
    That was one of the coolest things that's ever happened to me. I needed help to get to France, the maggots sent me, and I ended up winning a world title. It has, however, hardly ever been spoken of because a friend and competitor passed away during the event. Do you really want you $20 back?

  3. #53
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    Mar 2008
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    Get over it and integrate into the world you try to put yourself above. Sure you know how to treat certain terrain properly when others don't, but even the gapers are entitled to enjoy their gaper-lives in the land that we are all entitled to.
    Gapers can do whatever the fuck they want to hurt, or humiliate, or enjoy themselves.

    As long as they do it where they belong, which are the designated "Blue Square" runs.

    That is why they have those labels at resorts, you know, so dipshits can figure out where they belong so they don't HURT themselves or someone else.

    To all of those core bro's and bra's that are too cool to ski the inbounds terrain and see it as acceptable that it goes to shit can just go get fucked.

    The point is, that is good quality terrain and it is a shame to see it turn into something not worth skiing anymore. There should be protocol.

    What the fuck is with everyone that can't ski getting into such dangerous terrain, weather it's sideways or whatever.
    The point is, they don't belong there, and you'd think they'd figure that out after a few times, but they just keep coming back and doing the same fucking lame ass terrain butchering traverses to make 4 turns.

    There are plenty of places to make 4 low angle turns on the mountain.

    HOW ABOUT THOSE PEOPLE WHO AREN'T EVEN SKIING GO SKI SOMEWHERE ELSE INSTEAD OF ME HAVING TO GO BACKCOUNTRY. ITS NOT LIKE THERE ISN'T PLENTY OF BLUE SQUARE GROOMERS OUT THERE!
    "The skis just popped me up out of the snow and I went screaming down the hill on a high better than any heroin junkie." She Ra

  4. #54
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    Mar 2008
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    People posting fast in this one!

    Alto, all due respect. Congrats on your accomplishments. Even though you had help from the maggots, I'm sure you worked very hard for what you've won.

    But traversing good terrain sucks ass. You should help us fight the good fight.
    "The skis just popped me up out of the snow and I went screaming down the hill on a high better than any heroin junkie." She Ra

  5. #55
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    Sep 2006
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    Quote Originally Posted by YetiMan View Post
    I like to go to the traverse field and zipperline down it.
    That's hilarious. Someone is going to call you out for forming bumps though.

    Die bump makers die!!

    Straightlines on the fall line, that is the only thing that is permitted!!!!

  6. #56
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    Oct 2003
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    The Leper Colony
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lonnie View Post
    I asked for change, you looked at me like I was high. Replied "Get a life beater..." Thanks, I'll try....

    "Get a life beater" is the established correct and appropriate maggot reponse to "Change for a nickle." Search the archives JONG.
    HI THERE!

  7. #57
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    Nov 2008
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    Quote Originally Posted by doughboyshredder View Post
    Fuck ya, I am in one of those moods.

    First off I am on a snowboard and come in to all traverses hauling ass. If you're a dumfuck and have stopped or are generally lolly gagging and don't move I will hipcheck you. I will not lose my speed or the traverse line to avoid your sorry ass..
    Hitting me on accident will get a lively talking to at the minimum, running into me on purpose will get my boot shoved so far up your ass that you'll be spitting buckles and liner for weeks. If you choose to snowboard, then good for you, enjoy. Just remember that it doesn't give you the right to knock people out of the way so you can keep your speed up.



    Quote Originally Posted by doughboyshredder View Post
    Second off, sideslipping should be punishable by revocation of lift ticket / pass for an afternoon with a required tongue lashing by the gnarliest freeriders at your local hill.
    Snowboarders especially should verbally destroy any snowboarders you see sideslipping any decent lines.
    Well put. Why no asskickings for the snowboarders though?

  8. #58
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    Sep 2006
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    For some reason, although they were right next to each other, I felt these comments needed to be in the same post for hypocrisy's sake.

    Quote Originally Posted by doughboyshredder View Post

    If you don't move I will hipcheck you.
    I will not lose my speed or the traverse line to avoid your sorry ass.

    throw down the beat down.
    Quote Originally Posted by doughboyshredder View Post
    Can't just step out of the way huh? Gotta be all tough guy, and shit. can't wait for somebody to shove that pole up your ass.

  9. #59
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    Sep 2005
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    1,713
    I've skied at both KHMR and Bridger (Gripen + Tone's areas). I can TOTALLY see where they're coming from and 100% agree. At KHMR especially it's actually pretty dangerous. A lot of the chutes require speed, and people traverse right at the openings. I personally almost landed on someone off a cliff who was traversing. I had a spotter, but it was a weird situation where they were in a blind spot. The sheer amount of JONGs ath these places just keeps me elsewhere.

    It's not AS bad at some hills, but even here at WW, people traverse under major O.B. slidepaths for 3 turns. This is bad for everyone.

  10. #60
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    Apr 2008
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rideski View Post
    That's hilarious. Someone is going to call you out for forming bumps though.

    Die bump makers die!!

    Straightlines on the fall line, that is the only thing that is permitted!!!!
    Not sure if I hate sideslippers or people doing that shit. It amazes me how places turn into massive bump runs after 1 day of a holiday weekend.

  11. #61
    doughboyshredder Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by DeepHelmet View Post
    Hitting me on accident will get a lively talking to at the minimum, running into me on purpose will get my boot shoved so far up your ass that you'll be spitting buckles and liner for weeks. If you choose to snowboard, then good for you, enjoy. Just remember that it doesn't give you the right to knock people out of the way so you can keep your speed up.




    Well put. Why no asskickings for the snowboarders though?
    If you're not standing on the fucking traverse with your thumb up your ass you wont get checked.

    dumbfuck.

    It's really pretty fucking easy to step out of the way on skis. The only reason not to is to be a dick, and I don't like dicks. You dick skiers that intentionally do this to boarders know who you are. Deep Helmet, you may not be one, but I have personally seen skiers stop on traverses for the sheer purpose of fucking up the boarder behind them. Fuck that, I will check you.

  12. #62
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    Nov 2005
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    Quote Originally Posted by alto View Post
    I needed help to get to France, the maggots sent me, and I ended up winning a world title. It has, however, hardly ever been spoken of because a friend and competitor passed away during the event. Do you really want you $20 back?
    Really? I didn't know any of that.

    And no, I don't really want my $20 back. I'd just spend it on beer and post retarded shit on TGR. Wait...maybe I do want my $20 back.

    But seriously though, how about a little write up on what went down? I lost a friend on a trip in a foreign country, too. It kind of tainted the memory of the whole experience. Probably the worst thing that ever happened to me. But I felt better writing about it and sharing the story. I even heard from some of his family and friends. I think they appreciated a friend and someone who was nearby relaying their (my) experience with the whole thing.

    Man, shit. Now I feel like a real asshole.
    Last edited by RootSkier; 02-09-2009 at 09:35 PM.

  13. #63
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    Jan 2006
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    The Beach
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    1,082
    Quote Originally Posted by khyber.pass View Post
    Yah I'm in on this one. That's the story of Whistler sidecountry with Flute.
    Holy shit what a cluster fuck the lower quarter of Flute is. DOZENS of traverse lines across skiable fall line, and they all go absolutely nowhere! It's infuriating. We need a fence across the northern edge of the boot pack from just west of the big wooden sign up to the summit, complete with electrified razor wire.

    This business where all the lazy tards rock up to the bottom of the boot pack and then decide they'd rather not hike when they can traverse in for 2 or 3 turns has to end.

    Quote Originally Posted by tone capone View Post
    As long as they do it where they belong, which are the designated "Blue Square" runs.
    I disagree. If someone wants to challenge themselves that's great, even if it ends in failure, but ...

    Quote Originally Posted by tone capone View Post
    There should be protocol.
    This is exactly spot on. Blue square gaper wants to try the gnarly diamond bowl? Great, good for them because if they don't try at some point, they never will and will always be a blue square skiier. But they need to know the rules and protocols: No unnessisary traverse lines, no sideslipping from top to bottom, always move out of the way if stopping on a traverse, and be aware.

    IMO, the resorts need to do more to educate people on these things.
    Last edited by Shaggy; 02-09-2009 at 09:41 PM.
    Quote Originally Posted by StuntCok View Post
    Splat did tell me he liked his pussy like he liked his ski boots. I guess he meant dank, stinky and a bit packed out.

  14. #64
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    Jan 2009
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    Chamonix of the 70's
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    104
    Gapers give good BJ's.

  15. #65
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    May 2004
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    Colorado Cartel HQ
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    Quote Originally Posted by alto View Post
    My friend makes skis. I ski on them. Bigger opportunities have come and gone, but I love where I'm at. What would you suggest, Soul Skier?
    If I were you, I'd begin with respecting your friend Keith and his generosity of helping you out.

    You do know there are literally hundreds of people I've met and call friends on this forum, right? That's your answer why so many people show me love in those threads about me you usually talk shit in.
    Every time you say Colorado sucks!!! You alienate yourself from the Colorado maggots. Every time you show your jealousy of me or anyone else, you alienate yourself from my friends. Real talk? Nobody I know skis Praxis anymore. Why? Not wanting to support you in any way is definitely part of it.

    Since you want to play the sponsor me!!!! game, I'll let you in on a well known secret. YOU REPRESENT THE PRODUCT THAT BACKS YOU.

    I have the luxury of not giving a fuck and not playing that game. When you entered the SPONSOR ME!!! game, you forfeited that freedom.
    If you want to run yourself in the ground, be my guest. I don't care.
    But at least show some respect to those that have put their lives in a company, and used that to back you. It's an honor, not a privilege.

    Quote Originally Posted by ALTO
    Blurred,
    Your girlfriend claiming you stomped it doesn't do it for me. A grab would have been cool enough to overpower my doubts, but maybe you're too old to have ever learned such things. I wish I was under your spell like the rest of the dumbasses giving you the reacharound, life would be simpler that way.
    Eat a bowl of dicks,
    Drew
    -more maggot alienation..........
    Completely unacceptable. I'm done. You don't need to respond. That would be a good start. Consider my advice a gift. -Brett
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    brett.mcnary

  16. #66
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    Oct 2003
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    bozone montuckey
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    Quote Originally Posted by 2turntables View Post
    I always greet any "buzzing skiers" with a nice accidental gaper pole flail.
    good luck with that.

    Quote Originally Posted by 2turntables View Post
    I also know that any downhill skier has the right of way and any blind spots below me are dangerous areas that I need to be willing to give up my line on at a moments notice.
    this is incorrect and is the mantra of gapers everywhere. 'People ahead of you have the right of way. It is your responsibility to avoid them.' is probably the only line of the skiers responsibility code these people can recite.

    these two points are the ones that need more consideration:

    • You must not stop where you obstruct a trail, or are not visible from above.
    • Whenever starting downhill or merging into a trail, look uphill and yield to others.


    traversing below the chutes in mundy's or fuez or any other popular bowl is essentially merging with every fun line on the hill. it is up to the traverser to watch out for skiers coming from above. if you're doing it, look uphill, watch out for oncoming skiers and yield to them.
    "They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety."
    Ben Franklin

  17. #67
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    Mar 2008
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    lake level
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    Holy shit! I was going to start this thread myself. For real, if you can't ski it from the ridge, don't do it. In particular, Alpine Meadows. It's bad enough patrol puts in the traverse below Idiots, but what the fuck is up with traversing all the way out under Bernie's, across Sherwood Cliffs, below Keyhole, and all over High T. Do it from the top down, pussies! If you're too lazy to take a five minute walk, go to Squaw, they've got lifts everywhere. And all because you are not man (or woman) enough to huck the cliffs you are traversing under, doesn't mean that someone else isn't going to hit it. The five fresh turns you get fucks up countless lines for others that just want to ride the fall line.

  18. #68
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    Nov 2008
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    Quote Originally Posted by doughboyshredder View Post
    If you're not standing on the fucking traverse with your thumb up your ass you wont get checked.

    dumbfuck.

    It's really pretty fucking easy to step out of the way on skis. The only reason not to is to be a dick, and I don't like dicks. You dick skiers that intentionally do this to boarders know who you are. Deep Helmet, you may not be one, but I have personally seen skiers stop on traverses for the sheer purpose of fucking up the boarder behind them. Fuck that, I will check you.
    I wont be the one standing on the traverse with my thumb up the ass. Rectal penetration is improper in a ski resort location unless properly provoked. See my last post.

    I always step out of the way if I see someone coming, boarder or skier, that's faster than I am. I may have to stop sometimes because there's a gaper in front of me and no where else to go. I may have no choice but to stop in a place that will ruin your traverse. TOO FUCKING BAD. I'll ALWAYS get out of the way if I can, and it bugs the shit out of me when people don't, but I don't knock them out of the way and keep going. Do that to me and bear down, because that will make the ski boot in your ass hurt less.

    I moved my big ass out of the way today on the traverse to Black Forest at Soli for some guys coming up the sidestep faster than I was. I was beat and they were obviously going to overtake me so I got the fuck out of the way. Happens all the time there.

    If you plan on being a dick, stay at your resort. My resort has a killer friendly vibe and we don't need a douche ruining it for us. I don't bash into people that are in my way, and I get out of the way of people when I need to. The friendliness goes away when some fuckstick hits me on purpose. Reference my above post,
    Regards, Dumbfuck

  19. #69
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    Colorado is awesome, Oklahoma is awesome, Texas is awesome, the east coast is awesome. It's a lot of the people that aren't.








    Tell me where is where without looking at the url.

  20. #70
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    Apr 2007
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    2,171
    Seems like poeple ski the resorts to get a bunch of vert. and be in the scene. Then they start to get sick of the shit show. For a while they are bitter in bounds skiers. Then they rediscover skiing away from lift served areas and chill the fuck out again. People suck. If you can't deal, remove yourself.

  21. #71
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    Quote Originally Posted by khyber.pass View Post
    If there are SLOW: FAMILY ZONE signs on every grommer so I can no longer haul ass back home, there should be FAST: NO TRAVERSING signs at the entrance to every bowl, couloir, and glade.
    Quoted for truth.

    And if they can pull passes for going too fast on groomers (which is sometimes, sadly, necessary), they can put up anti-traverse ropes and pull passes for crossing them. Frozen railroad tracks on the runout of a mandatory straightline are a safety hazard for expert-level mountain guests, just like icy moguls and snowmaking pipes on popular green and blue runs are a safety hazard for beginner and intermediate mountain guests.

    That being said, people who are aggro about their version of "etiquette" really suck. It's no harder to say "Please don't sit in the traverse track" than it is to yell "Get out of the way, a**hole." And if anyone body-checked me off a traverse, whether I'm "in the way" or not, they shouldn't be surprised at anything that happens to them afterward.



    Heavenly does a lot of messed-up things, but they do one thing right: the entire boundary of Mott and Killebrew Canyon is roped off, and each entry gate is marked double-black with a huge warning sign. You'll still see some boarders doing the "falling leaf" down the chairlift line, but a lot less than you'd expect given the gaperness of the rest of the mountain.

  22. #72
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    Quote Originally Posted by DaveVt View Post
    Seems like poeple ski the resorts to get a bunch of vert. and be in the scene. Then they start to get sick of the shit show. For a while they are bitter in bounds skiers. Then they rediscover skiing away from lift served areas and chill the fuck out again. People suck. If you can't deal, remove yourself.
    My main problem with non resort skiing is I ski alone, and hate skiing with people. As much as I want to just ski BC shit, I would rather deal with the (m)asses and stay alive.

  23. #73
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    Apr 2007
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    2,171
    Seems like poeple ski the resorts to get a bunch of vert. and be in the scene. Then they start to get sick of the shit show. For a while they are bitter in bounds skiers. Then they rediscover skiing away from lift served areas and chill the fuck out again. People suck. If you can't deal, remove yourself.
    Does anyone remember what it's like to be a beginner at anything, or are you too pridefull to suck at something in public? Get over yourselves.

  24. #74
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    Quote Originally Posted by DaveVt View Post
    People suck. If you can't deal, remove yourself.
    That should make someones signature. Too funny.

    Does anyone remember what it's like to be a beginner at anything, or are you too pridefull to suck at something in public? Get over yourselves.
    I have a monoski. I take it out 2 or 3 times a year. My friends laugh and point, but I've learned to be humble about it.

    You make a really good point. More of us need to approach skiing like we approach bowling or air hockey. With a happy go lucky attitude.

    Most of us definitely take ourselves WAY too seriously. (I'm guilty)
    Follow me on Instagram

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  25. #75
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    Jan 2005
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    Salt Lake City, UT
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    1,053
    To see some really nasty traversing and sideslipping, check out the Park City ridge line a day or 2 after a dump. Shit, everything a half mile north and a mile south of 9990 looks like a veritable checkerboard once the snowboarders (and a few gaper skiers) get done with it.

    While these folks did pay for their tix, I remember when I was a young gaper (22), I caught shit all the time from all ages when I side-slipped through stuff that was over my head. A little ribbing isn't a bad thing and it's kinda always stuck with me when I get into a challenging terrain today.

    "Make a turn, Nancy!"

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