Morning Routine

[k2josh]

I am not a morning person at all. I absolutly sleep until the last possible second before I am extremely late to work. I wake up plenty early enough to do a buncha shit, like shit, eat breakfast, take a shower, tug for awhile, but instead I hit the snooze and my lazy ass goes back to sleep. I did the math and decided I could make about $150 to $200 more per paycheck if i got up and to work an hour earlier. You would think the money would be enough motivation to get up and haul ass, yet I keep on sleeping...How the hell can I break my morning routine, and start new habits?

Make me laugh mags...

[alias]

You can always do what I did. Have a few kids that make you get up in time to get them to school. Works flawlessly.


OR

If your not as committed to getting up on time as I was - move your alarm clock a significant distance away from your bed. Actually getting up & going over to turn it off might make it easier to stay up.

You could always try to go to sleep earlier too. But that never worked for me.

[OldLarry]

go to bed sober

[PassTheDutchie]

Shit at work, dumbass. Nothing like getting paid cash money to sit on the can.

[SkiCougar]

no, here's the problem. youre not lazy, you would go in early, but your body likes to sleep and be lazy; so you need to teach your body to do what you want it to.
heres what you do. next time you sleep in when you wanted to get up early, you need to apply fire to your body in some sort match, lit cigarete, etc. as soon as you get up and repeat this until your body starts listening to you. i guarrantee youll solve the problem within a week.

[toast2266]

Get this:


http://www.slashgear.com/laser-tag-a...orning-179714/

mostly just because its awesome.

[milton]

better yet, an alarm clock that hides from you.

[k2josh]

the hiding alarm clock is the tits.

[Helldawg]

The kids thing definitely works.

Also, car-pooling with an angry, aggro, crotchety old bastard gives an incentive to be at the rendezvous on time.

[Sphinx15]

I never used to have this problem, now with a more lax work atmosphere (I can go in whenever I want), I tend to hit the snooze when I never did before. It really helps me to just get up and get right into a hot shower, it's the best way to wake up and it's not that hard to sleep-walk over there. Once you're in, you're up and good to go.

I also love the hiding alarm clock...

[72Twenty]

You could also rig a contraption that involves your alarm clock and a car battery attached to your balls via old speaker wires.

[advres]

Get a coffee maker. Set it to brew so it is almost done when your alarm goes off. If your bathroom is near your bedroom, put your alarm clock in there. When you get up to shut it off, take a shower immediately. That plus the smell of fresh goodness in the pot will get you going. If that doesn't help, do the go to bed sober thing (I don't recommend this ).

Plus, your diet, exercise routine and other things play a big role in your sleeping habits if you didn't know.

[72Twenty]

Do you have access to a wild (or at least very irritable) badger?

[Pura Vida]

I like waking up to the smell of bacon. Sue me. And since I don't have a butler, I have to do it myself. So, most nights before I go to bed, I will lay six strips of bacon out on my George Foreman grill. Then I go to sleep. When I wake up, I plug in the grill. I go back to sleep again. Then I wake up to the smell of crackling bacon. It is delicious, it's good for me. It's a perfect way to start the day.

Just don't step on the grill!

[k2josh]

I like to do active shit, but my diet and other exercise=less than spectacular.

I may try the battery to nipples thing.

[Egon]

Keep the same schedule up for a couple weeks and you will wake up an hour earlier. Magic.

[LivinCO]

get a: choose one: wife/girlfriend/boyfriend

Give them a: choose one: shotgun/hammer/machette/ski pole

incentivize them to use chosen tool (i.e. money, massages, purses, duct tape)

repeat...until dead or awake early.