Best Gaper qoute of the weekend?

[fiddler]

Attachment 219704
Keep Portland weird

Oh yeah, flaming bagpipes!

[zartagen]

How about his choice of shovels, what a gaper.

Must be rog.

[irratator]

Not driving a toy pu or sub uni; hes a gape fersure.

[iceclimb]

Got on the lift with a family from Long Island, based on accent. About 1/4 the way up the young woman starts screaming... “ow, ouch, OW, OW!!! Oh god that hurts”

We all kind of pause and she then berates her brother for touching her board. She said her board has nerves.

[Supermoon]

Attachment 219704
Keep Portland weird

Unipiper!!

[Harry]

Cross-posted to the SW Montana thread:

I got stuck being the tour guide for some out of town friends of a friend of a friend. Met up with them at the Starbucks in the Mountain Mall. Total gapers, but I was sore & tired from yesterday's powder-fest, so I thought an easy day would be nice.

We caught the very first chair of the day up Ramcharger, these people had looked at the trail map and they really wanted to ski Sacajawea and Deep South (yes, DeepSouthMafia's favorite run). On the chair ride up the two of them are getting on my nerves, they are one of those couples who laugh at there own jokes. We unload at the top of Ramcharger and there is a rope across the access to Ponderosa, El Dorado, Sac, & Deep South; but one of the poles holding the rope up fell down, and so the rope is laying in the snow. I pointed out that the run is closed and we will have to do a different run. They came unglued. She started crying and he very loudly complained "BUT THE WEBSITE SAID THESE RUNS ARE OPEN !". I told them I am not skiing across a rope and down a run that may not have an operating lift to bring us back up. I told them my alternate suggestion, ski Africa, but they were not having any of it and starting skiing across the down rope. I decided fuck it, I don't know these people, so I turned around and went down Tippy's Tumble and got on Swifty. Never saw them again and they have not texted me. Good.

[~mikey b]

Those might be the people SAR is looking for.

[east or bust]

They came unglued. She started crying and he very loudly complained "BUT THE WEBSITE SAID THESE RUNS ARE OPEN !". I told them I am not skiing across a rope and down a run that may not have an operating lift to bring us back up. I told them my alternate suggestion, ski Africa, but they were not having any of it and starting skiing across the down rope.

It always blows my mind when I come across people like this.

[wyeaster]

it sort of makes me feel better about myself!

[jonesy]

Better to ski off than get any on you from up coming shitstorm those type of morons bring on themselves.

[babybear]

wow -started crying about a run not being open? and just so I am 100% clear these were adults, right?
Harry you should have toured them around towards a nice cliff......

[old goat]

Friends of a friend of a friend? I guess the friend of a friend, the friend knew better. That should have been a warning.
Who needs a local guide to ski green and blue groomers?

[wyeaster]

the first time i ever got first chair on an epic powder day also happened to be one of my first days with my new gopro and i was super nervous, so i kept taking my helmet off to make sure the red light was on and the battery hadn't died. then when the lift started turning i turned to somebody and asked "is my light on?" he just stared. i rode up with a super cool guy who was a painter in the summer and rode all winter and his ski came off in 1 bowl on the very first run under a foot of pow and we spent 15 minutes looking for it while everybody zoomed by in the untracked.

yay! then i got home and the vid was all foggy. it made me give up on worrying about a camera. that was the last time i used it.

[TahoeJ]

Who needs a local guide to ski green and blue groomers?

This is the funny part and it happens a lot. People will ask if maybe I can show so-and-so my favorite spots / stashes at Alpine Meadows, for example, and I say sure, only to later discover that they only ski groomers. Uh, look at the trail map I guess? One of them reported back to a mutual friend that I didn't show them anything good and just took off after a while. lol...

[~mikey b]

That’s like me “showing people around” who are NSP patrollers at my hill.

[mooseknuckles]

On the lift today: dude with a patchy molester stache and beater skis that when resting against the rack on their tails, barely graze the lower lip of his naval... "I watch a lot of powder skiing movies on youtube, my favorite ones are from The New York Times..."

[Meadow Skipper]

That’s like me “showing people around” who are NSP patrollers at my hill.

Right? Like I'm going to show a visiting patroller my stash. Save that for cool mags.

[jonesy]

In SS we use to ski waist deep Cascade Concrete on 120cm Elans, the 1st paribolic teaching skis. Management didn't allow us to use our personal equipment. OTOH skiing 210cm was about the same.

[snoqpass]

Right? Like I'm going to show a visiting patroller my stash. Save that for cool mags.

What if the cool mag was a patroller?

[Meadow Skipper]

What if the cool mag was a patroller?

Hmmm, I guess that could happen. mikey_b would get the full tour. As well as others here - they tend not to be your average NSP pass-seeking pin collector.

[WTF is dat]

At Vail this weekend I rode up with a woman who was speaking in a heavy Liverpool British accent. She was talking about living in the UK to the other people on the chair. I just listened and didn’t say anything.

Later in the day I went up the singles line and got onto the chair with the same lady from earlier. She didn’t recognize me and started talking to the people on the chair in a Russian sounding accent, and she told the people on the chair that she was from Denmark. I immediately called her out on her bullshit and told her that I had rode up the chair earlier in the day when she pretended to be from the UK. In perfect American English she replied “that wasn’t me”



I can only assume this woman gets a kick out of practicing fake accents on the chair? Maybe she is legitimately crazy?

[abraham]

Wasn't there a jaded local article about having fun making up your life story on the lift when riding as a single?

[~mikey b]

Patroller or not if you’re cool you get the tour of the goods. If you’re a tool you get shown the dodgy bits that require a shitty hike out. I love the dodgy bits and the shitty hike out but not everyone does.

[delco714]

At Vail this weekend I rode up with a woman who was speaking in a heavy Liverpool British accent. She was talking about living in the UK to the other people on the chair. I just listened and didn’t say anything.

Later in the day I went up the singles line and got onto the chair with the same lady from earlier. She didn’t recognize me and started talking to the people on the chair in a Russian sounding accent, and she told the people on the chair that she was from Denmark. I immediately called her out on her bullshit and told her that I had rode up the chair earlier in the day when she pretended to be from the UK. In perfect American English she replied “that wasn’t me”



I can only assume this woman gets a kick out of practicing fake accents on the chair? Maybe she is legitimately crazy?

Just let her be. Sounds hilarious to me. Monty Python style

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[wyeaster]

seriously. why not just enjoy a little weirdness.