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  1. #101
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    Jan 2006
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    France
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    Quote Originally Posted by Franz Klammer View Post
    No, that one skis pretty well, but she's not the most athletic type.
    And she has a moustache under the keffieh.




    (Yes, hire an instructor in the morning and ski with her in the afternoon).
    "Typically euro, french in particular, in my opinion. It's the same skiing or climbing there. They are completely unfazed by their own assholeness. Like it's normal." - srsosbso

  2. #102
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    The land of Genesee Cream Ale and homemade pierogies!
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  3. #103
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    Oct 2004
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    Quote Originally Posted by Franz Klammer View Post
    I should have said that I did take the Austrian Skiing Instructor Test when I was 20 and have taught little kids 7 years ago. Not that this is terribly important.
    But girls are worse to teach than 7 year olds, they throw worse tantrums at the smallest things

  4. #104
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    Quote Originally Posted by p@wder View Post
    But girls are worse to teach than 7 year olds, they throw worse tantrums at the smallest things
    They are also more likely to withold sex....

  5. #105
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    Dec 2004
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    Quote Originally Posted by Franz Klammer View Post
    Those are all (different) ex-girlfriends.

    Yeah, once I widened their orifices I was done and tossed 'em to Franz. They are all yours Racoon Face. "NEXT?!!"
    Every man dies. Not every man lives.
    You don’t stop playing because you grow old; you grow old because you stop playing.

  6. #106
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    Nov 2007
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    lake tahoe/reno
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    keep church and state seperate! I guess all pw dudes need to learn the lesson once firsthand. I sure as hell did! Even went as far to buy her a pair of skis. HUGE mistake!!! never fuckin again will i make the attempt to teach a girl to ski. My advise: give her a snowboard and tell her to make some snowboarding friends. She'll catch on and will enjoy it most likely.

  7. #107
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    Apr 2007
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    The Valley
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    i dont know if this has already been discussed because i cant read all this, but teaching is really an art. you have to learn how to explain the same thing in more than one way. Nobody understands one explanation, you keep trying until the lightbulb goes off and the aha moment hits. i would highly suggest a lesson (coming from me to was taken to the top and let go by herself to learn). Also, those pictures arent all the same person. do you have two beginner GF's you have to teach?

  8. #108
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    Apr 2007
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    Beartooth Mtns.
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    It is sage advice to get a ½ day instruction for all the reasons that have been listed.

    One additional thought is for you to rent some tele gear for the weekend. If she is athletic as you report, she will end up waiting on you for the rest of the trip. I did the tele thing when I was teaching my kids to ski and now love tele’ing but can not keep up with any of them. You will spend a lovely weekend learning together.

    If there happens to be 8” fresh, go with the all day lesson and just check in over lunch.

    If there is 14”+, give up on togetherness on the slopes idea totally. Any attempt to ski with a beginner on such a day will result in absolute disaster for the relationship. If she doesn’t understand, fuck it, there are more girls out there and you can not squander a 14”+ day.

  9. #109
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    Dec 2004
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    Quote Originally Posted by mtsprings View Post
    If there is 14”+, give up on togetherness on the slopes idea totally. Any attempt to ski with a beginner on such a day will result in absolute disaster for the relationship. If she doesn’t understand, fuck it, there are more girls out there and you can not squander a 14”+ day.
    Are you referring to the pow or to the angry manlihood?
    Every man dies. Not every man lives.
    You don’t stop playing because you grow old; you grow old because you stop playing.

  10. #110
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    Jan 2004
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    North Vancouver
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    Forget old pics we've seen. Lets see pics of the new squeeze to we can better advise.

  11. #111
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    Apr 2007
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jim S View Post
    Are you referring to the pow or to the angry manlihood?
    Hilarious!!!!

    I wish I could say both, in reference to me, but I can't.

    Goodcatch though, that is funny.

  12. #112
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    Nov 2006
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    Reno, NV
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    2,244
    Quote Originally Posted by Nobody Famous View Post
    WTF? TGR is broken!

    Quote Originally Posted by TGR
    Sorry, no matter how much you try, you can not ignore yourself.
    Well, I tried

    okbye
    TELL YOUR BOOBS TO QUIT STARING AT MY EYES!!!1!

    Here, I'll help you out:
    Quote Originally Posted by Nobody Famous View Post
    RENO SUPERMOTO

  13. #113
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    Aug 2006
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    Mahoosuc Range
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    379
    Quote Originally Posted by Franz Klammer View Post
    but has gone cross-country skiing and played hockey in high school and college (and still plays recreationally right now). She also has very good hand-eye coordination and plays a ton of other sports.
    get her a private lesson, a group will just be a waste. Pass the above info to the instructor (on the sly, if need be); this gf of yours is the kind of potential skier every instructor drools over teaching. With the x-country and hockey, linked parallel turns are doable with a half day lesson.

    Quote Originally Posted by Franz Klammer View Post
    I have passed the Austrian Skiing Instructor test when I was 20, but have taught only kids and haven't taught anyone in 7 years.
    yeah, but your quals are immaterial. No matter how sound your instruction, what she's going to hear is "Franz hates me." Get the lesson, then have a leisurely lunch, and go play with her on the greens in the afternoon.
    ya know, beer is far more than just the world's most perfect breakfast food.

  14. #114
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    Mar 2007
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    Madison Park, Seattle
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    the asian chick was pretty hot.
    Top of the Food Chain for White Trash America

  15. #115
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    Feb 2007
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    nyc
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    Didn't read entire thread, but is it just me but -- do those three pics look like they are of three different chicas. Just a thought. Mad rezpect.

    -jong out

  16. #116
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    Jun 2007
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    Idaho Springs, CO
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    27
    Quote Originally Posted by Franz Klammer View Post
    My brother also had the very useful suggestion of going ski touring with her and then at the top of the mountain tell her:

    "Ok, now ski this. I'll see you at the bottom."
    my dad was part of the general contracting team that built most of the condos on sugarloaf that appeared during the late 1980s and early 1990s. the management at the time kept telling him that he should learn to ski, they would appreciate him using the benefit of the mountain, blah blah. so one day he finally decided to do it. i'm sure he was in jeans or carhartt's and a hunter orange hat. they gave him some gear at the shop, then the general manager or whoever just pointed him at spillway chair and said "stay left" (meaning to stay on tote road). so he's at the top, skis and carhartt's and hunter orange, intending to head skier's left to tote road, but completely unable to turn. needless to say, he ended up down narrow gauge or skidder and had a "bad time". he said he basically tobaggonned the mountain on his tails, walked directly back to the gear shop and said, "i'm not doing that again". i got a couple free days there when i was a little older so it wasn't all a lost cause.

  17. #117
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    Oct 2007
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    I taught my girlfriend how to ski last year at A-Basin.

    I used to teach skiing when I was around 20 also at Attitash in NH, but I usually only taught little kids.

    My gf also is an athlete, but shes from the midwest. She played field hockey and even went to Iowa on a scholarship for it. I taught her on a beat up old pair of 177cm rossi straights with boots two sizes too big and no poles. We lapped the bunny sloope at a-basin all day for two or three days. It took her about 4 or 5 times to get up the lift and ski a top to bottom green. I ended up skiing with her between my legs the first time, which isnt too hard because shes fairly petite.

    She loved it and I had successfully taught her the fundamentals such as the snowplow and stopping and turning. This year we got her a pair of 148 Volkl Kayas, poles, and boots that fit. We have been skiing every weekend. Now that she understands the fundamentals I pretty much just let her ski. When I see her doing something weird I give her a tip and she listens and we keep skiing. Its pretty simple.

    I think to do this successfully you have to be willing to commit to at least ONE full day on the bunny hill and accepting that she probably will NOT see you tearing it up until next year. As a former instructor, I'm sure you already understand this.

    If shes a natural athlete you should have no problem. Keep it FUN and dont get all bent if she cant even stand up after a few hours, just laugh and be ready to go in when shes cold..and ALWAYS let her know that she doing really great, even if she isnt so much. I think if you canmake this work, shes a keeper.

  18. #118
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    Feb 2005
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    where it's steep and deep
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    Wow, that was easy. We spent 3 days at Sunday River. Sorry if what follows sounds more like it should be posted on Epic Ski.

    First Day Morning:
    - I taught her the fundamentals of how not to look like a gaper (no gaper gap, how to carry the skis, etc.)
    - We skied down to the base from the condo. It was painful to watch as she tried to swing her body around to initiate turns.
    - I booked a 2-hour private lesson at 10am so we had time for another warm-up run down a green run. Things are starting to look up as she manages to turn without falling.
    - I dropped her off with a ski instructor with a moustache the size of Kazakhstan and then gimped around in the park for about 2 hours. When I picked her up again, the ski instructor says: "She should be ready for blue runs now."

    First Day Afternoon:
    - The first run down a blue after lunch was painful again: lots of falling but at least the technique was improving.
    - Then, miraculously, on the second run everything seemed to be coming together: speed, technique and confidence. The parallel turns were perfect, it was a blessing that she never learnt how to ski plough-turns.
    - From then on it was a walk in the park. We skied blue runs for the rest of the day. At the beginning I was still skiing switch most of the time, but as she kept improving I had to ski forward more and more often to keep up with her.

    Second Day Morning:
    - I figured out that every time when we restart she needs a warm-up run: "I need to remember what I am supposed to do."
    - She dealt easily with her first single black diamond run and then just a few runs later with a bumped-up-iced-up single black diamond run which wasn't groomed over night.

    Second Day Afternoon:
    - She easily kept up skiing in a crowd of intermediate skiers (my friends from university) and was also confident skiing on her own as I poached some light powder on the closed run underneath the Aurora Peak chairlift.
    - Even double black diamond runs with vintage East Coast blue ice didn't scare her anymore: all parallel turns and nice edge hold on the ice. "I think my skis (150cm) are too short, they wobble around to much", she said.

    Third Day:
    - There was a light dusting overnight so the conditions are pretty variable. By now she was skiing faster and more securely than most of the other people in the group (none of them beginners) and I didn't have to wait for her very much at all.
    - When I asked her on the chair lift about the technical flaws of people skiing underneath us, she was able to point out most of the problems.

    Some good quotes (I swear they're true):
    - "I like it when there's more snow and I can't see my skis."
    - "Why does the guy ski in jeans and a starter jacket?"
    - "Doesn't he get cold with a gaper gap?"
    - "With all those bruises my body looks like a topographical map."

    Some problems that remain:
    - She still considers the pole plant as somewhat optional.
    - She should bend her knees more (no problem with back seat or leaning forward though).
    - I don't quite know how to get her started on carving turns.
    - Strangely enough, she's kind of slow when traversing.
    Last edited by Franz Klammer; 01-28-2008 at 10:32 AM.
    Ein Berg ohne Absturzgefahr ist nur noch Attrappe. (Reinhold Messner)

  19. #119
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    Jan 2007
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    SnoqWA
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    Way to go, you've found yourself a good woman if she can do that in three days.

  20. #120
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    Dec 2005
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    North Idaho
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    I am a former instructor.

    I am teaching my girlfriend how to ski.

    It is working well.

    I got her Lito Tejada's book "Getting Out of the Intermediate Rut" and told her to read it.

    I took her from "I just like skiing greens, and some blues if they're not too steep" to skiing Calendar chute at Copper (cleanly!) in something like 18 days on the hill.

    There were moments of "I don't like you!" from her, but she gives good feedback about what works and what doesn't. The only thing she hates is when I yell instructions at her when she's skiing.

  21. #121
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    Dec 2002
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    I still consider the pole plant optional, but pics are not.
    Living vicariously through myself.

  22. #122
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    Feb 2005
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    where it's steep and deep
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    Quote Originally Posted by coreshot-tourettes View Post
    The only thing she hates is when I yell instructions at her when she's skiing.
    Yeah, I figured that this is not one of her favourites (to put it mildly).
    Ein Berg ohne Absturzgefahr ist nur noch Attrappe. (Reinhold Messner)

  23. #123
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    Mar 2006
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    is Gorges
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    Quote Originally Posted by Franz Klammer View Post
    Some problems that remain:
    - She still considers the pole plant as somewhat optional.
    - She should bend her knees more (no problem with back seat or leaning forward though).
    - I don't quite know how to get her started on carving turns.
    - Strangely enough, she's kind of slow when traversing.
    Sense were all epic

    With my instruction/coaching I hardly ever talk about bending knees. Either bending ankles or driving knees forward.

    I would suggest that she still takes lessons. Now that she is beyond the beginner stage, group lessons make sense know. Cheaper and smaller class size.


    And thanks for getting another one hooked.

  24. #124
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    Feb 2005
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    where it's steep and deep
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    UPDATE!

    Here are some pictures from her 5th and 6th day of skiing at Jay Peak and Cannon:











    Many thanks to tief_schnee for the Lange Comp 120 (she doesn't know how stiff they are), mountainman for the Look Nova 10 and Schuss for gifting his awesome Dynastar Candide Pro (sorry, mang, we took off the "Dirty Tree Sluts" stickers!).
    Ein Berg ohne Absturzgefahr ist nur noch Attrappe. (Reinhold Messner)

  25. #125
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    Nov 2005
    Location
    Redwood City and Alpine Meadows, CA
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    8,277
    Looking pretty damned good for less than a week on skis. Nicely done.
    not counting days 2016-17

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