PNWbritprobably summed us up the best:

It should be noted that it is not neccesary for one to actually have a vagina for one to have sand in one's vagina.

I still think the answer should be "I'm armed and my dick hurts!"

On a related note- lurk around a bit and try to come up with an original name. We've got Mtn. Man and Mountainman, altachic and altagirl, Beaver and Ski Beaver, etc.

And only losers choose a...