pretty sure Danno is the only one here qualified to answer this properly

yes ikea cabinets are cheap but IME the actual cabinet place in town uses the same cheap shitty MDF, and only quoted cabinets in the same 3" increments so I would have ended up with filler panels. ...

Whoosh...

I was recently quoted $12,000 CAD pesos for kitchen cabinets, but that was for small (100" x 70") L-shaped kitchen, cheapest option on everything, not including counters.

this sounds like your painting dude.... "friends used him & said it was all good". You are a slow learner danno...

How's the painting debacle coming along?

Why do you want to get rid of it? The texture covers up your shitty uneven ceilings.