Douche bags that think it's acceptable to completely gear up in the shitter stall i.e. buckle up boots, close all zippers, flip hood and drop goggles.
I'M SHITTIN' MY PANTS OUT HERE!!!!
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Douche bags that think it's acceptable to completely gear up in the shitter stall i.e. buckle up boots, close all zippers, flip hood and drop goggles.
I'M SHITTIN' MY PANTS OUT HERE!!!!
That's gross. I want to spend as little time in the ski lodge shitter as humanly possible. Only enter of absolutely necessary. Full on shit race. Who dafuq gears up in there?Quote:
Originally Posted by PB
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I would think the most annoying part of all this would actually be having to take a shit while skiing….
Exactly. And FFS don't take your food & drink in the bathroom. Disgusting.Quote:
Originally Posted by skinipenem
In the employee bathroom the other week I saw a grown ass ski instructor washing his coffee thermos in the sink while someone was taking a dump in the stall 4 feet away...Employees have a break room with a kitchen right down the hall.
Coffee cleanse at least 1 hr before heading to the hill.Quote:
Originally Posted by BC.
Too true, however, as I progress through my golden years the simple act of climbing in elevation automatically triggers a second morning dump.Quote:
Originally Posted by BC.
This too, of course, is annoying.
if I have to shit when I’m skiing I go out and shit in the woods - snow is good wipeage
Aspen, February 2019. Talk of a mysterious virus in the air. Hope it stays in China. Ate a quality wrap (think it was the Wrapzilla™) at Big Wrap for lunch, then back up Ajax for afternoon fun. Sitting on Gents Ridge chair, and oh no the rumbling begins... get to the top, and it's gone. We're gonna be fine, maybe just a fart... Start skiing, and nope. It's coming. Now the race begins, gotta get to the bottom in like 5 minutes or less. Absolutely bombing it, squeezing my ass cheeks together. Big "SLOW" sign at that weird corner, screw that. Get to the bottom of silver queen, take skis off, throw them on to the closest rack, and just fly down the stairs in my boots to the shitter. Run in, "please be empty please be empty" and oh my god yes.Quote:
Originally Posted by BC.
#2 shit of my life right there. Life-changing.
How does this work? Do you just grab a handful of loose crystals and rub them around, or do you pack it in to some sort of shaped tool that fits in the crack? Do you throw the shit-covered ball back towards your buddy? What do your gloves smell like?Quote:
Originally Posted by ~mikey b
pack a snow cone with a nice taper to it - wipe, throw, repeat
you shouldn’t get shit on your hands
Had to switch planes for some safety issue on the old one and I left my $6 bottle of water on the old plane. Doh.
People simply disregarding traffic signals because the roads are snowy. Somebody is going to get fuckin' PASTED if they're not more careful. :mad:
Don't forget your poop bag.
Never had a sudden urge on the hill/hike, but after driving sea level to 7k' I've been known to park in the handicap space, do the squozen cheeks tippy toe to the nearest lodge poop house. The one time somebody acted liked they were going to speak harshly to me, they backed off after they observed my my squaddly hasty walk.
When the berms are higher than the cars it makes sense to go slower even if you can go faster.Quote:
Originally Posted by skaredshtles
For sure.Quote:
Originally Posted by BC.
A few yrs ago my husband was asked by one of the ski magazines (when they had those) about how he prepares for a day of skiing or something like that.
I remember laughing so hard when I read it later and saw that one of his "tips" was to make sure to take a poop before heading to the mountain
Pretty good advice though
From the Classic Allen & Mike’s Really Cool Backcountry Ski Book.Quote:
Originally Posted by ~mikey b
Attachment 443197
That silly little book had a lot of influence on my trajectory of life- it was so helpfulQuote:
Originally Posted by Meadow Skipper
me too
So ..... butt plugs should be kept in the freezer?!?!?!?
When you want the backcountry experience from the comfort of home.
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And helpful if you eat too much spicy food.
Me too! And the telemark tips one of courseAttachment 443317Quote:
Originally Posted by ~mikey b
they did a good job with that stuff
I think it was perfect timing too
When people in meetings say they are going for, or it's time for, a "bio break."
Somehow this is grosser to me than just saying you need to go take a shit or piss. Just excuse yourself for a few minutes and don't give us a reason, eh!
An acquaintance that was super Christian and wouldn’t swear used to say “get your poop in a group” instead of “get your shit together.” I always though her way sounded more gross.Quote:
Originally Posted by paulster2626