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onehotchili
05-11-2005, 12:23 PM
figured some Tahoe maggot might be interested in this.... somehow i don't think my wife would go for this arrangement.

http://reno.craigslist.org/bar/72472287.html
----------------------------------------------------
++Do You OWN a Place in Tahoe? Lets TRADE!!++
Reply to: anon-72472287@craigslist.org
Date: 2005-05-09, 1:27PM PDT


I am a young woman with dogs (2 smallish) planning to move to tahoe in the next few weeks to month from reno. Do you own a place and would like to trade rent for a delicious encounter a couple of times a month? We would meet outside of the home. I am interested in a years lease and do not wish to co-habitate. I am tall and voluptuous, sensual and sincere. Do not smoke or drug. email me for pix...include info on the property. thank you!




* this is in or around Tahoe
* no -- it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

Tyrone Shoelaces
05-11-2005, 12:24 PM
Paging ARTY!!!!! :D

freshie247
05-11-2005, 01:07 PM
I'm not sure what catigory to quantify this under.rental concubine?

Big E
05-11-2005, 01:32 PM
Is she asking for pics of the property, of the landlord/gigolo, or for sending pics of her to the landlord ??

gonzo
05-11-2005, 01:39 PM
someone needs to step up here and email her some pictures of a house and ask for pictures in return...

Arty50
05-11-2005, 01:58 PM
Paging ARTY!!!!! :D

If only I owned property. Time to call my bank and see if I can put something together in the next couple of weeks. :D

Of course, co-habitation would make this so much easier. And only a couple times a month? Pffft. Even lph works harder than that.

grrrr
05-11-2005, 02:26 PM
You don't need a place to rent, Arty...just a place to "interview".

meatdrink9
05-11-2005, 02:53 PM
Freaking hilarious. Somebody has to get some pics emailed.

phUnk
05-11-2005, 03:03 PM
Who's in for a timeshare?

splat
05-11-2005, 03:09 PM
Talk about take the dregs out of those maggot summer blues....

lemon boy
05-11-2005, 03:14 PM
her lower ad indicates MILF status...

how bizzare.

Maybe several guys could pitch in on a rental for her and take turns.

:FIREdevil :eek: :FIREdevil :eek: :FIREdevil

Core Shot
05-11-2005, 03:17 PM
her lower ad indicates MILF status...


and also gives her direct email addy:
---------------------------------------------------

Reply to: honeyblondedd@yahoo.com
Date: 2005-04-22, 8:47PM PDT


I am a lovely MILF moving to Tahoe in the next few weeks/month. Do you own a place and would like to trade rent for a delightful encounter with me several times a month? I have two well behaved dogs. I do not wish to cohabitate, and am very discreet. I am voluptuous and sincere. Serious responces will receive a pic. Include info on the property in your responce.

Superstar Punani
05-11-2005, 03:22 PM
Sent.

--------------------------

How YOU doin?

Saw your ad on Craigslist. I'm a jetset single guy with a pad in Tahoe that I only use for the weekends during the season. Let me know what arrangements you have in mind. I work as an International Business Executive in the Entertainment Industry and am rarely in one place more than two weeks at a time.

Let me know if you like what you see, and if you are in need of some pleasure.

xoxo,

The Superstar


PS. You're also welcome to use my other properties in New York, Vegas, Sydney, Honolulu and Geneva but that would be extra.

https://www.tetongravity.com/usergalleries/albums/userpics/normal_TahoeHouse.jpg

lemon boy
05-11-2005, 03:24 PM
knew we could count on his superstarness.

Telenater
05-11-2005, 03:24 PM
Superstar Punani strikes again...

Darkside
05-11-2005, 03:27 PM
Does the "dd" in her email address maybe indicate something about the size of her breasticles?

Darkside
05-11-2005, 03:28 PM
Oh, and unfortunately my house is a bit small to be renting any part of it out. Plus, I don't think my girlfriend would be so psyched.

LAN
05-11-2005, 04:03 PM
Oh how I love the waterfall pic ...

I was gonna offer to send Miss dd an e-mail if someone can provide me with a "recreational" e-mail account.

iceman
05-11-2005, 04:07 PM
Pretty funny.

Maybe you shoulda thrown in the surfing-crotchgrab pic too.

Superstar Punani
05-11-2005, 05:03 PM
AARRRRRGGGHHHHH!!!! MY EYES!!!!!! MY EYES!!!!!!!

It's a MIWTWA10ftP!!!


-----------------------

From : honey pie <honeyblondedd@yahoo.com>
Sent : Wednesday, May 11, 2005 2:28 PM
To : Superstar Punani <suprstar_punani@hotmail.com>
Subject : Re: Place in Tahoe


i LOVE the pic of you on the rocks! i am single (obviously) drug/disease free...seeking a situation in which i am able to stay a year or so...and get settled up there. i have a 4 year old son who is my focus in life. we live a simple life and moved to reno almost 2yrs ago from dallas/fort worth. cant wait to move away...desire to do so in the next couple of weeks. i will be enrolling in school (again!) and doing some nanny work. i have a very clean background--worked for the federal govt...but it wasnt making ends meet. the biggest stumbling block in moving so far has been my dogs--i found them as malnourished puppies up in verdi while collecting firewood a year and half ago. they are mutts. very lovable and not destructive.
would love to stay at your pad...we would keep it in great shape...
shall we meet for a drink and discuss?

smooches
goddess j

https://www.tetongravity.com/usergalleries/albums/userpics/normal_CL-Reno1.jpg

https://www.tetongravity.com/usergalleries/albums/userpics/normal_CL-Reno2.jpg

dbp
05-11-2005, 05:06 PM
That was quick.



shall we meet for a drink and discuss?


TR?

LAN
05-11-2005, 05:07 PM
Oh my God ...

Where do we even begin? The bangs ... the outfit ... the cleavage!!!

Punani, you are really something else. I dare you to write back and request more pics.

Below Zero
05-11-2005, 05:07 PM
THAT'S FUCKING GREAT! Nice work Superstar!

midget
05-11-2005, 05:10 PM
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaak!

Core Shot
05-11-2005, 05:11 PM
AARRRRRGGGHHHHH!!!! MY EYES!!!!!! MY EYES!!!!!!!

It's a MIWTWA10ftP!!!




Ask her if she would be willing to wear a burlap sack over her head while you titty fuck her.

truth
05-11-2005, 05:13 PM
I dare you to write back and request more pics.


Fuck that, I dare you to email her the link to this thread.

Duker
05-11-2005, 05:20 PM
Fuck that, I dare you to email her the link to this thread.

That would mean. but OH so funny. Nice work SP

gonzo
05-11-2005, 05:25 PM
yeeeeee HAW! this is awesome. someone should snag those pics and upload them somewhere so no part of this thread ever die.

Spats
05-11-2005, 05:30 PM
Vocabulary lesson:

voluptuous = fat

runethechamp
05-11-2005, 05:33 PM
I bet she was thinking that Punani was too good to be true when she read his reply. And I guess he is :fmicon:

spanky
05-11-2005, 05:39 PM
i am laughing so hard it's making my shoulder hurt (1 week post-op).

splat
05-11-2005, 05:42 PM
I do believe this would be a first in dirtmaggotry.

LAN
05-11-2005, 05:44 PM
Vocabulary lesson:

voluptuous = fat

I was thinking more like: bad dye job, Wet 'n Wild lipstick, bangs circa 1987, huuuuuuuge tits, and a lot of debt at the Fashion Bug.

Do you think she has a tripod? I wonder who took the pics ...

meatdrink9
05-11-2005, 05:56 PM
Keep working this thing. More rounds of photos. More exotic emails. If you meet this nasty ho-bag for drinks I may pee myself.

onehotchili
05-11-2005, 05:58 PM
freakin' awesome job... i step out for 3 hour meeting after my original post and SP gets pix of the goods. Spats - you're right... voluptuous = fat.

somehow i knew the Maggots would come thru. god... i can't stop laughing. too fvcking funny....

LAN
05-11-2005, 06:00 PM
bump.

It's been a while since Punani has posted. Makes me kinda wonder ...

Stikki
05-11-2005, 06:24 PM
Somewhere there is a forum of derelicts laughing their asses off in disbelief that somebody responded to their Tahoe Whore ad.

Superstar Punani
05-11-2005, 06:31 PM
From : Superstar Punani <suprstar_punani@hotmail.com>
Sent : Wednesday, May 11, 2005 4:33 PM
To : honey pie <honeyblondedd@yahoo.com>
Subject : Re: Place in Tahoe

Yum yum! Daddy Like! Could you send me some more pictures of what's on your menu, as I am getting hungry for your "delicious encounters". You look like a fun girl.

I will be heading to Vegas for work in the next few days then taking off to Europe for the first part of the summer. Let me know when works for you and maybe we can have a drink. Perhaps I may also introduce you to my close friend and business associate, Arty. He generally takes care of things for me when I'm not in town.

By the way I am located in South Lake Tahoe. I love this place and have been cumming, oops I meant coming ;) here for 15 years. In my younger days I was a ski instructor and semi-professional athlete...but for now I have decided to grow up and pursue a much more lucrative career to support my lifestyle.


xoxo,

The Superstar

P.S. Sorry if you cannot see me- Tahoe is a small place and I need to be discreet at times. Perhaps when we get to know each other some more.....

http://www.biglines.com/photos/pbpic3564.jpg

DJSapp
05-11-2005, 06:34 PM
OMFG. The amount of potential here is unreal. It's about time we had a good troll.

gonzo
05-11-2005, 06:35 PM
laughing my ass off in class right now. holleeeeeee shit! :D

skier666
05-11-2005, 06:47 PM
http://pages.videotron.com/bluefire/Images/hump.gif http://pages.videotron.com/bluefire/Images/loveslayer.gif http://pages.videotron.com/bluefire/Images/explode.gif

SkiJunky05
05-11-2005, 06:48 PM
this shit is bananas
:FIREdevil

Punani, you never stop amazing me. :fm:

acostiga
05-11-2005, 06:51 PM
(just carving my initials on what should become one of the greatest threads in tgr history)

hucksquaw
05-11-2005, 06:54 PM
fuck ya! this thread is awesome! punani is the man!

dbp
05-11-2005, 06:57 PM
Maybe you could ask for a picture of her holding a sign that says "I heart Superstar Punani". You could say you are nervous about meeting her and think the pictures are too good to be true.

SquawMan
05-11-2005, 07:03 PM
I've got to state the obvious since nobody else has said it already:

SHE'S PROBABLY AN UNDERCOVER COP

who in their right mind would write something that provocative?

either world's most desperate woman or, I'm guessing, the Fuzz waiting to bust your ass for soliciting a prostitute if you ever meet her

be careful

Superstar Punani
05-11-2005, 07:05 PM
I've got to state the obvious since nobody else has said it already:

SHE'S PROBABLY AN UNDERCOVER COP!!!!

who in their right mind would write something that provocative?

either world's most desperate woman or, I'm guessing, the Fuzz waiting to bust your ass for soliciting a prostitute if you ever meet her

be careful

Blow me. How's that for a solicitation?

DJSapp
05-11-2005, 07:05 PM
I've got to state the obvious since nobody else has said it already:

SHE'S PROBABLY AN UNDERCOVER COP!!!!

who in their right mind would write something that provocative?

either world's most desperate woman or, I'm guessing, the Fuzz waiting to bust your ass for soliciting a prostitute if you ever meet her

be careful

Don't you dare cunt up this thread. This is trolling at it's finest (though sadly, she's proably a troll too :()

kush1
05-11-2005, 07:12 PM
This poor woman all she wanted was a nice guy that would trade sex for her rent :nonono2:

oh wait she deserves this, get neked pics host them somewhere else link them here and send her this link :biggrin: (oh and make sure you put "fat girl naked" the thread title so that I dont open it)

jayfrizzo
05-11-2005, 07:14 PM
No one should send her the link to this thread.

Punani, IMO get as much as you can out of her then "disappear." We're getting a kick out of it. She probably is, too. No reason to make her feel bad.


J-

slim
05-11-2005, 07:15 PM
Come one Squawman. You're a millitary guy... don't act like you don't know prostitution is legal in Nevada.

13
05-11-2005, 07:17 PM
My money says she's a troll too.

But damn, this is seriously fuckin' entertaining. Bwa!

SquawMan
05-11-2005, 07:21 PM
Come one Squawman. You're a millitary guy... don't act like you don't know prostitution is legal in Nevada.


I'm all for having fun.... but this smells of a Fuzz set-up to me

nobody is that overt, nobody

if it sounds too good to be true, it always is

the Fuzz don't know he's kidding, they'll just nail him and use his emails as evidence he was soliciting a prostitute

can't get better evidence than the written word

we don't want him to get thrown in jail

just be careful

jayfrizzo
05-11-2005, 07:23 PM
can't get better evidence than the written word

I don't know the law, but on TV you have to say "I'll trade you [something] for sex."

Plus, I do want him to get thrown in jail.

13
05-11-2005, 07:24 PM
You're a dumbass.

He didn't solicit shit, if anything, this reeks of entrapment if it is the poh-leece.

acostiga
05-11-2005, 07:31 PM
the man has over 2,000 posts. he obviously knows what he's doing.

splat
05-11-2005, 07:43 PM
You're a dumbass.

He didn't solicit shit, if anything, this reeks of entrapment if it is the poh-leece.

Really, if he's just checkin out the goods, it don't mean squat. I'm sure far more forward offers get made on Craigslist daily. And, for the unedumacated, prostitution is legal in Nevada only if the transaction occurs in a licensed brothel with a licensed whore. This broad is wingin' it. As long as a price or trade is not agreed upon, no crime occurs from the perspective of either a reverse sting or violating prostitution laws that apply to unlicensed activity.

basom
05-11-2005, 07:45 PM
As long as a price or trade is not agreed upon, no crime occurs from the perspective of either a reverse sting or violating prostitution laws that apply to unlicensed activity.


..........

13
05-11-2005, 07:47 PM
Dear splat,

You are the man. :cool: Heh.

Sincerely,
13

LAN
05-11-2005, 07:51 PM
Freaking hilarious!!!

Lane Meyer
05-11-2005, 07:52 PM
Well, this gets my vote for post of the year, already.

hucksquaw
05-11-2005, 07:54 PM
Squawman, your mother is not an undercover police officer. Ok?

but she will love you long time.

mattitude
05-11-2005, 07:55 PM
I figure she moved from Texas to Reno to work at the bunny ranch. Now she has some clientele and wants to move here operation to Punani's Playhouse in Tahoe. Punani, just make sure you negotiate a maggot discount! Squawman needs to get some and relax.

Great work Punani. Keep this thread going.

Superstar Punani
05-11-2005, 08:17 PM
BOOOOOOO!!!!

She's more interested in my "house" than me!

http://vintners.net/wawine/gold_digger/gold_digger_logo_sml.jpg

--------

From : honey pie <honeyblondedd@yahoo.com>
Sent : Wednesday, May 11, 2005 6:22 PM
To : Superstar Punani <suprstar_punani@hotmail.com>
Subject : Re: Place in Tahoe

okay daddy...i dont have any other pics...as i might have to be president of the pta one day...
we can meet during the day tomorrow or fri...i would prefer to meet, see the house, talk...and then on a seperate occasion (this weekend?) have our date. (as i dont have daycare this week--my girlfriend that watches my boy for me has finals) is that cool? i know you will want to play, but we can wait a little bit (nothing in front of the boy!)

i am not familliar with south tahoe...so i would need really good directions.

smooches
goddess j

SquawMan
05-11-2005, 08:30 PM
Oh god.....RUN!

Superstar Punani
05-11-2005, 08:32 PM
...I'm sure more than enough Kirkweed maggs would vote for sending honeyblondedd to Cohee's pad :D

:FIREdevil

or Arty's...... :biggrin:

El Chupacabra
05-11-2005, 08:39 PM
This is quickly becoming an immortal thread.

Can we add a pic of honeyblondedd to the TGR maggot bike jersey somewhere? Maybe close to the whelk?

Punani, send her a full size pic of :fmicon: and explain that it's one of your friends who'd like to meet and "party."

splat
05-11-2005, 08:46 PM
Just tell her the feigned shyness is unacceptable and that there's a monthly allowance in it if you find her nudes appealing. Just dangle a carrot she can't help but swallow. She'll fold.

Z
05-11-2005, 08:51 PM
gold, punami. gold.

Tippster
05-11-2005, 08:53 PM
Electronically signing the witness list in another chapter of Maggot history...

Punani, you are the Sensei. Wax ON.

LAN
05-11-2005, 09:14 PM
Just tell her the feigned shyness is unacceptable and that there's a monthly allowance in it if you find her nudes appealing. Just dangle a carrot she can't help but swallow. She'll fold.

Brilliant.

Core Shot
05-11-2005, 09:23 PM
BOOOOOOO!!!!

She's more interested in my "house" than me!



Don't give up yet.
Try working the dog or kid angle.
Tell her you are not sure about having three dogs in your house.
She is obviously holding back on the nudie photos, but maybe you can get some bathing suit shots (uggghh).
Tell her you like her big titties, but want to make sure she is not too chunky - that's why you need more pics.

At least get a pic of her poodle.

ask her if she has done any online dirty chats like this:
http://badgas.co.uk/griffnut/unhappy_woman.jpg

G
05-11-2005, 09:43 PM
Hmmm, I think I know miss Honeyblonde.








Either way, I just gave her directions to LPH's house.

natty dread
05-11-2005, 10:22 PM
I'm dying here SuPu! :D Excellent work.

Arty50
05-11-2005, 10:27 PM
...I'm sure more than enough Kirkweed maggs would vote for sending honeyblondedd to Cohee's pad :D

:FIREdevil

or Arty's...... :biggrin:

Noooooooooooooooooo!!!!!! I'll buy you new Iggys, a pair of Spatulas, and 5 BILLION lap dances. Don't do it man! Think of the children!

LAN
05-11-2005, 10:30 PM
Here you go! (http://www.ebaumsworld.com/milkshake.html)

InspectorGadget
05-11-2005, 10:49 PM
Here you go! (http://www.ebaumsworld.com/milkshake.html)

I think I'm going to barf . . . . I really wish I hadn't clicked on that link.


Craigslist = online pimpin' & whorin'




Had to add my name for posterity.

midget
05-11-2005, 11:13 PM
Here you go! (http://www.ebaumsworld.com/milkshake.html)

Holy fuck that was the most disgusting thing I've seen in a long ass time.

shirk
05-11-2005, 11:13 PM
Send her to the meth heads that live next to Arty.

Dexter Rutecki
05-11-2005, 11:14 PM
I'm all for having fun.... but this smells of a Fuzz set-up to me

nobody is that overt, nobody

if it sounds too good to be true, it always is

the Fuzz don't know he's kidding, they'll just nail him and use his emails as evidence he was soliciting a prostitute

can't get better evidence than the written word

we don't want him to get thrown in jail

just be careful

You're the next TJ Burke.

Samwich
05-11-2005, 11:40 PM
I noticed this thread when it was still in its infancy. I thought it was pretty funny, but not worth a second glance. Then I see it's 4 pages, so i click it again. PURE GOLD.

Punani, you're my hero.

By the way, you have to end it by telling her that you were on the wrong end of a large-scale international cartel bust and Interpol liquidated all your assets. See if she's down for a conjugal visit.

Platinum Pete
05-11-2005, 11:51 PM
By the way, you have to end it by telling her that you were on the wrong end of a large-scale international cartel bust and Interpol liquidated all your assets. See if she's down for a conjugal visit.

That's no reason to end it. eBay the conjugal visit to a lucky inmate!
My hat goes off to you SuPu.

SquawMan
05-12-2005, 12:04 AM
http://www.ebaumsworld.com/images/mugshot-hughgrant-100.jpg

Viva
05-12-2005, 12:06 AM
Okay, I was bored. I sent an e-mail to this chick. I'll be amazed if she responds, though.

BobMc
05-12-2005, 12:09 AM
Okay, I was bored. I sent an e-mail to this chick. I'll be amazed if she responds, though.

I've watched you post for the last three years or so, you aren't bored, you're hopeful.

BobMc

Superstar Punani
05-12-2005, 12:12 AM
Ahhh, a little shy are we? No problem. I completely understand. It's just that the first couple you sent completely drives me wild...rrRRROOWWWRRRRrrr!

What type of dogs do you have? Are they housebroken? You see I have a collection of fine 18th Century Persian carpets and a collection of exotic tropical fish. As long as the dogs are well behaved then they're welcome as well. I love dogs- black labs are my favorite.

Your 4yo is also welcome to hang around, though I will be upfront- I tend to throw some wild and crazy parties for my clients and friends....you know, anything goes type of parties that would make the Girls Gone Wild videos look like Sesame Street, and I would prefer if there were no minors so as not to corrupt their gentle minds. My friends sometimes use my place when I'm not around as well. If you're cool with that then it's all good.

Have you seen the movie "Snow Job" starring Carmen Luvana, Britney Skye and Eve Laurence? That was actually shot on location at my cabin. I hope you're not camera shy because I like to make films. ;)

I have a busy schedule tomorrow so I may not get to meet for a while until I'm back in town. If you do have any more pics just send them to me, G rated or oterwise. You look verry cute.


...and very tasty.


xoxo,

The Superstar


------end of email-------

Here is the vid I had referenced. Link NSFW
http://www.eroticabyclohi.com/rsnowjob.html



http://www.eroticabyclohi.com/snowjob2jpg.jpg

SquawMan
05-12-2005, 12:13 AM
http://www.sixthseal.com/images/full_body_condom.jpg

enlosandes
05-12-2005, 12:15 AM
Time to spice things up!


anon-72472287@craigslist.org

My name is Harken Banks and I saw your add on craigslist. I have a real nice spread in Squaw. During the winter months I am out ripping with my bros.

So, tell me a bit about yourself. What is young and voluptous mean?

I have a 10 year old male mix dog who likes peanut butter.

Here is a photo of my dog and I ripping, don't really have any digi close ups phots at the moment. I'll have my photographer hook me up. I like to party.

Ciao for now, HB

hucksquaw
05-12-2005, 12:28 AM
punani is absolutely KILLING IT!! keep this shit rollin dude....

Gaper Jeffey
05-12-2005, 12:51 AM
This thread has me laughing so hard, I think I may need to be hospitalized.

Good work Punani!

hop
05-12-2005, 01:04 AM
SP, you are my hero.

Seldom Seen
05-12-2005, 01:40 AM
Punani is Da Hui
Way to go mang, this is fuckin' hilarious!

mattitude
05-12-2005, 02:06 AM
Request to all: Let the superstar do his work Do not blow this by contacting her.


SP#1

Tippster
05-12-2005, 07:53 AM
I've watched you post for the last three years or so, you aren't bored, you're hopeful.

BobMcBob +1. :D

The ball's in your court, sir.

snow_slider
05-12-2005, 08:13 AM
Best.Thread.Ever.

Punani kicks ass!

iceman
05-12-2005, 08:35 AM
I've watched you post for the last three years or so, you aren't bored, you're hopeful.

BobMc

bwa

...........

truth
05-12-2005, 08:42 AM
bwa

...........

Baaaaa?

http://www.islandentertainmentsonline.com/acatalog/mascotwoolysheep.jpg

Viva
05-12-2005, 09:14 AM
I've watched you post for the last three years or so, you aren't bored, you're hopeful.

BobMc

And I've seen your posts over that same time. I trust you've enjoyed living vicariously through me.

Viva
05-12-2005, 09:16 AM
Request to all: Let the superstar do his work Do not blow this by contacting her.


SP#1

Agreed! I didn't know SuPu wasn't done milking this cow. I'll lay low and pick at the scraps when he's done.

Oh, SuPu, Don't mention husky latin women to this chick!

Tippster
05-12-2005, 09:29 AM
And I've seen your posts over that same time. I trust you've enjoyed living vicariously through me.
Lame. "E" for effort.

Twy it again, Gwasshoppa.... wif feewing.

yogachik
05-12-2005, 09:47 AM
who's the jong who can't spell (or write) who's trying to get in on this? go away JONG - leave this to the master SuPu.

This is better than any of the screenplays I've read this week.

Spicoli
05-12-2005, 09:54 AM
Brilliant, absolutely fucking brilliant!

You must CLOSE the deal and tap that cow! Or at least get some pics of you playing with those milk jugs

natty dread
05-12-2005, 09:54 AM
I've watched you post for the last three years or so, you aren't bored, you're hopeful.
BobMc

Harsh Bob. But fucking hillarious. :FIREdevil

Crinkle
05-12-2005, 09:59 AM
first off, super cudos to SUPU for thread of the month material. Absolutely had me in stitches.

bobmc=hilarious as always


And I've seen your posts over that same time. I trust you've enjoyed living vicariously through me.
if you mean being shot down and repeatidly dumped....ok then maybe he is. ;)

grrrr
05-12-2005, 10:06 AM
I think SP needs to firm up this deal a bit - like how is she going to pay the rent when he's out of town. I think he needs to have a "rental manager" who can pick up when he's not available. Or maybe just a long list of all his friends in the tahoe region...

Aldo
05-12-2005, 10:19 AM
Oh my goodness gracious. I'm crying here. This is classic.

As I am reading this a woman from a real estate company is measuring our office in every way possible. I kid you not she may be this woman's twin. Huge boobs, every time she bends down to measure I'm seeing the same rack from page one. Her perfume is taking over our whole 4400 sq ft space. Almost surreal...

Keep her on the line Punani!!!!

Franz Klammer
05-12-2005, 10:53 AM
For some reason SuPu's e-mail conversation reminds me of this:

http://sweetchillisauce.com/ntales/Min1.html

altachic
05-12-2005, 10:56 AM
Killing it.

This is AWESOME. :biggrin:

Tuckerman
05-12-2005, 12:41 PM
She's been falling for this for years now. Great work

50kLeg
05-12-2005, 01:13 PM
So glad I came back to read this. Perfect way to start my day off. ROFLMAO

freshie247
05-12-2005, 01:32 PM
Here you go! (http://www.ebaumsworld.com/milkshake.html)

That's disturbing!

LAN
05-12-2005, 01:34 PM
That's disturbing!

I had to ...

freshie247
05-12-2005, 01:39 PM
I think this thread is hilarious,
but get real,best thread ever?

slippy
05-12-2005, 02:44 PM
Cody is in Costa Rica right now. Send her to his house when he gets back in a week. I can get his address for her.

Duker
05-12-2005, 03:06 PM
I think this thread is hilarious,
but get real,best thread ever?


he's right the P18 widebrake thread was way better :wink:

teledave
05-12-2005, 03:16 PM
From : honey pie <honeyblondedd@yahoo.com>
Sent : Wednesday, May 11, 2005 2:28 PM
To : Superstar Punani <suprstar_punani@hotmail.com>
Subject : Re: Place in Tahoe ...............

https://www.tetongravity.com/usergalleries/albums/userpics/normal_CL-Reno1.jpg

The return of NursKris?


Originally posted by Foggy_Goggles:
You had to know this sh!t was coming.
Kris are you full figured/big boned/husky too?


Originally posted by NursKris:
that i am...5'10" of full figured lovin' :p

from mfi & mssblondx in chamonix france (http://forum.powdermag.com/forum/showflat.php?Cat=&Number=62506&page=0&view=collapsed&sb=5&o=&fpart=1)

H-man
05-12-2005, 04:00 PM
The return of NursKris?





from mfi & mssblondx in chamonix france (http://forum.powdermag.com/forum/showflat.php?Cat=&Number=62506&page=0&view=collapsed&sb=5&o=&fpart=1)
Nice find Dave that was a classic thread. My favorite line in it

"Is the sky made of Lego there?"

Of course it goes without saying that this thread is considerably better.

SuPu = The Mang!

kush1
05-12-2005, 04:05 PM
Cody is in Costa Rica right now. Send her to his house when he gets back in a week. I can get his address for her.


Im with slip on this on, although someone would have to hide in the bushes to film it!

hucksquaw
05-12-2005, 04:27 PM
Cody is in Costa Rica right now. Send her to his house when he gets back in a week. I can get his address for her.


Im with slip on this on, although someone would have to hide in the bushes to film it!

DO IT!! DOOOO IT!!!!!

lemon boy
05-12-2005, 04:31 PM
just point the ubercam over there...

meatdrink9
05-12-2005, 04:45 PM
No one should send her the link to this thread.
No reason to make her feel bad.


What frizzo said.

Hilarious stuff. No question this lady is either an idiot or troll. I feel bad for the 4 year old kid.

splat
05-12-2005, 04:53 PM
Punani - waasup?

AfroMullet
05-12-2005, 05:10 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by slippy
Cody is in Costa Rica right now. Send her to his house when he gets back in a week. I can get his address for her.




Quote:
Originally Posted by kush1
Im with slip on this on, although someone would have to hide in the bushes to film it!



DO IT!! DOOOO IT!!!!!





For the love of mankind, YEESSSSSS!!!!

Superstar Punani
05-12-2005, 05:34 PM
Punani - waasup?


Sorry, I haven't heard from honeyblondedd since the last e-mail. I just fired off the one below.



---------------------

Helllooooo

I have not heard from you. I really would appreciate a nice person to look after my Tahoe cabin when I'm out of town since all my friends seem to do is run out of control and trash the place with constant parties. I'm even considering the inclusion of a monthly allowance in the deal if I find a person with the right fit (such as a DD ;)).

Hope I didn't scare you off. I don't bite....hard.

rrrRRROOWWRRRRrrr.


xoxo,

The Superstar

slippy
05-12-2005, 06:17 PM
Problem might be that Cody will fly into SF and then Santa Cruz, and not be back at his cabin after Costa Rica. I could find out. It's up to SP though.

DJSapp
05-12-2005, 06:19 PM
Date: 2005-05-09, 1:27PM PDT



This posting has been removed by Craigslist community.


72472287





BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Superstar Punani
05-12-2005, 06:29 PM
Problem might be that Cody will fly into SF and then Santa Cruz, and not be back at his cabin after Costa Rica. I could find out. It's up to SP though.

Do It! :D

Superstar Punani
05-12-2005, 06:55 PM
LAME!

--------------------

From : honey pie <honeyblondedd@yahoo.com>
Sent : Thursday, May 12, 2005 4:52 PM
To : Superstar Punani <suprstar_punani@hotmail.com>
Subject : Re: Place in Tahoe



well...you did scare me a little...
the thing is...i am all about being a mommabear right now. so wild parties are not my scene...(now if we had hooked up a few years ago...different story)
im not comfortable with people in and out.
we would take wonderful care of your place...i have two 60 gallon tanks myself--so you dont have to worry about your fish. the dogs are housebroken and lovey--(just kind of not-too-smart.)
i wouldnt presume to impose 'restrictions' on your current use of the house...so it might not be the best fit with my little family. we are all about respect. i would want your friends to respect us and our space first and foremost. it might be too much to ask. hate to be all responsible and everything...but it is my current roll in life.
best to you darling...let me know if you are still interested.
jessica

AfroMullet
05-12-2005, 06:58 PM
You'd better be still-interested, considering this filming project and all.

hucksquaw
05-12-2005, 06:59 PM
i have two 60 gallon tanks myself

yes she does

LAN
05-12-2005, 07:12 PM
I think Punani's smooooveness came on a bit too strong. Lure her back in Punani!

InspectorGadget
05-12-2005, 07:15 PM
Originally Posted by Superstar Punani
i have two 60 gallon tanks myself
yes she does
:biggrin:

Core Shot
05-12-2005, 07:19 PM
The only way you can reel her back in is to convince her that she is getting a solo house, with no wild parties and no friends crashing over.
Maybe someone else can close this deal.
SuPu is too strong for her (maybe he needs to buy the sponsorship secrets CD)
All she wants is a quiet peaceful home in exchange for titty fucking bukkake.
Somebody else has got to reel this fish (or whale) in!

She has a name, though.

Henceforth she shall be known is these parts as

Jizz-Guzzling, Giant Jugs Jessica!

http://tetongravity.com/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=5766&stc=1

[edit to say - she did leave the door open for SuPu to reconsider and accept the deal on her terms]

Viva
05-12-2005, 07:27 PM
Here the exchange that I've had so far- Yes, she responded. But I'm not going to respond 'til SuPu's done with her.


From : honey pie <honeyblondedd@yahoo.com>
Sent : Thursday, May 12, 2005 5:20 AM
To : XXXXXX XXXXXX <xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx@hotmail.com>
Subject : Re: Tahoe place

hey there orlando...thank you so much for responding!

i am a single mom of a 4yr old...thus the not wishing to co-habitate--or 'see' anyone in the house.
im 5'11--over 6ft in heels, i would say husky, not fat. actually i wouldnt say husky either--perhaps 'zuftig'. pics attached. hope you enjoy!
i can get paperwork about the std free...we would have to meet and discuss before i spend the money though...
can you send pics of the property? i am looking to move soon, next couple of weeks. i am currently near idlwilde park (so we can meet first in reno if you prefer.)

smooches
j

XXXXX XXXXXXX <xxxxxxxxxxxx@hotmail.com> wrote:

Good evening,

My name is Orlando and I am doctor of heterologous pathology at UNR. I have place in the north shore Lake Tahoe that I use on some weekends for my running training. It is on lake front and very nice. I am not using much
these days because of heavy snow and would like someone to stay and watch over place because I am not there anymore.

I also like arrangement with you. In my heyday I was young man with hot
blood, but even in middle age the blood is still full of steam. You say you
are voluptuous. Do you mean husky or fat? I am latin man and prefer the husky latin womans, but you not have to be latin. My last girlfriend, Sophia, was husky girl. But she leave to go to Las Lenas Chilie where she meet a new
boyfriend, Cletus. I like strong woman but I don't care for fatties. Do you
also have test papers to show you are clean and no STD?

At work some the nurses say Viva el Caballo when see me. This mean life to
the horse. Do you want to know why they say horse? I show you!

I wait to hear back. And please send picture!

Orlando

yogachik
05-12-2005, 07:40 PM
I'm very tempted to offer up a house myself - she didn't specify male or female...

BigKuba
05-12-2005, 08:07 PM
...pics attached.

are these any different than the ones she gave to SuPu?


I am latin man and prefer husky latin women

nice touch, Viva.

enlosandes
05-12-2005, 08:15 PM
Hey YogaBiyatch,

Why don't you step it up since I am too much of a jong for the job.

Arty50
05-12-2005, 08:24 PM
Hey YogaBiyatch,

Watch it there sonny boy. You don't have enought posts for that yet; in fact, I don't think anyone does.

As for Yoga's post... Do it! Do it! Do it!

vinnay
05-12-2005, 08:34 PM
At work some the nurses say Viva el Caballo when see me. This mean life to
the horse. Do you want to know why they say horse? I show you!


Orlando

laughed out loud at this one.

yogachik
05-12-2005, 08:53 PM
wwmdincali.at.yahoo.com>
Subject: tahoe rental exchange
To: honeyblondedd@yahoo.com
Hi there -
Forgive my delay in writing, but I read your ad on
craigslist the other day and am intrigued. I couldn't
write sooner because I had some issues to sort out
regarding the Tahoe house before I could contact you.
I was waiting to hear if my girlfriend was, in fact,
moving out, as we had discussed. You see, she's not
as open as I am about seeing other women, and I'm hard
pressed to find a woman who can keep my complete
attention. I don't know if you've seen the show The L
Word, but I think it pretty accurately depicts me and
my lifestyle - do you know the character Shane on that
show? She's a lot like me - in spirit, anyway.

You didn't specify male or female, and I am a woman -
also voluptuous - and very open to your suggestion of
trading rent for whatever pleases us. My house is
amazing, really. The wall of glass looks right onto
the lake. I'm there more in the winter than in the
summer, and live in LA (West Hollywood, really) most
of the time. What is it, exactly that you are looking
for, and what is your timeline?

If you're interested - and open - to a woman, please
send pictures and I will do the same.

Looking forward - E

Nohillsnearby
05-12-2005, 09:02 PM
Here the exchange that I've had so far- Yes, she responded. But I'm not going to respond 'til SuPu's done with her.



hey there orlando...thank you so much for responding!




Orlando?? hehehe

cultvo
05-12-2005, 09:16 PM
this is too much fun.

Superstar Punani
05-12-2005, 09:34 PM
Here the exchange that I've had so far- Yes, she responded. But I'm not going to respond 'til SuPu's done with her.


Hell no! Be my guest Viva! This is hilarious! Let's see what she says to the Caballo!

13
05-12-2005, 09:54 PM
Dear god, this is only getting better & better what with the horse & yogachik stepping up to bat.

grrrr
05-12-2005, 09:57 PM
I'll take Orlando at 7:2 or "E" at 15:1. SuPu's still got the odds, but the bait was too strong...

altagirl
05-12-2005, 10:01 PM
BTW - That's quite a nice avatar, LAN.

Tippster
05-12-2005, 10:03 PM
You people are killing me. :D:D

Viva: TYPING with an accent? :the_finge

enlosandes
05-12-2005, 10:40 PM
Good work yogachick, I new you'd step up! Anxious for her reply!

LAN
05-12-2005, 11:01 PM
BTW - That's quite a nice avatar, LAN.

Thanks! It's Josh Duhamel.

Telekóptero
05-12-2005, 11:22 PM
I'll take Orlando at 7:2 or "E" at 15:1. SuPu's still got the odds, but the bait was too strong...

Agreed. I've got Orlando 5:1 if the accent tones down. Better hope she's not a spanish speaker.

oh and. . .. heperalougous phlobotomy what?. . . :D classic!


blurry, where are ya, mang? how could you miss this?

fondigley
05-12-2005, 11:46 PM
You'd better be still-interested, considering this filming project and all.

Exactly, this has been my late night entertainment for the past two days and I have been rolling on the floor, it is so hilarious.

I can't believe there are 7 pages of this shit so far.
Pure genious, to entertain me this way.

iceman
05-12-2005, 11:48 PM
It's not that funny.

grrrr
05-12-2005, 11:57 PM
It's not that funny.

Are you just saying that because she bears some resemblance to your seester?

yogachik
05-13-2005, 12:14 AM
"honey pie" <honeyblondedd@yahoo.com>
Subject: Re: tahoe rental exchange
To: wwmdincali.at.yahoo.com

hey there E...
i am the single mom of a fabulous 4 yr old boy--he is the focus of my life. i am intrigued by your inquiry. have had some part-time girlfriends in the past, but have mainly dated men. not that i have dated but twice since my son has been come along. havent seen the show...is it on cable? so perhaps we should meet and have a glass of wine and see what's up. i currently live in reno and am anxious to move in the next couple of weeks. moved here from dallas/fortworth 2 yrs ago on a whim. (was i insane?) i wish to be able to stay in the house for a year (or close to...) to get settled into the community and save some money. i miss the ocean so much (originally from new england) and enjoy the lake beyond words.
hope you like the pics..
jessica


* by the way, I got the same 2 pics

Superstar Punani
05-13-2005, 12:37 AM
Oooops, I hadn't checked my e-mail until now and just saw this:

------------------

honey pie <honeyblondedd@yahoo.com>
Sent : Thursday, May 12, 2005 5:16 PM
To : Superstar Punani <suprstar_punani@hotmail.com>
Subject : Re: Place in Tahoe


more on the dogs...they are mutts. i used to refer to them as lab-mix puppies...but it gave the impression that they are larger than they are. they are spaniel size. the male is solid black with long hair, not fixed. Bear. i keep thinking if i get his little nuts chopped off he will calm down a bit. but then i dont want to take the fire out of him--his blatent lust for dog life--jumping the fence, sniffing everything, chasing cars. he is the bad one. eats the teenage mutant ninja turtles. the female (his sister) has short hair, is all cream and is fixed. Sugar. she is the smarter of the two--but we dont tell that to them. she stayes in the yard, barks at strangers, snuggles on the couch with me.
i was just outside (for the first time all day) and it is lovely! the sun on my skin was incredible! ive gotten so pale! cant wait for summer! is there private space to lay out nekkid at your place? especially since i drove to tahoe on mon thru a friggin blizzard!
i am sure we could work something out that would be mutually beneficial and satisfying...
smooches
jessica

Franz Klammer
05-13-2005, 12:48 AM
What do a Superstar, a Latin Lover and a hot chick have in common?

Chica
05-13-2005, 12:50 AM
O.K., fantastic, this thread is so laugh-out-loud funny! What is the record for length of pages on this sort of thing?

LAN
05-13-2005, 01:01 AM
It sounds like honeyblondedd fulfills Punani's fantasies - she's up for some girl-on-girl action. :D

bad_roo
05-13-2005, 02:52 AM
A different tack...

Hi,

Can you include more information on your displacement in cubic inches?
I have a high-capacity swamp cooler for those hot Tahoe summers and it
needs constant adjustment based on the ambient temperature, the
relative humidity and the specific heat capacity of the air inside my
luxurious lumberjack cabin in Rubicon Bay. Perhaps the most attractive
aspect of the house is the hardwearing vinyl flooring that is now so
collectable. I have a paisley print in the head and it matches the
curtains in all but colour and pattern.

I have a tortoise, but I'm certain it could become accustomed to two
small dogs. It's a fast learner and is fully toilet trained. You
mentioned that two of the dogs are smallish but how big are the rest
of them? I'm rather frightened of large dogs since a visit to Juarez
in 1997 when my shoes fell off. I was intrigued to know more about the
delicious encounter mentioned in the ad. Can you bake? I'm rather fond
of stovetop stuffing and would be willing to trade Betty Crocker
products for rent if you could source them in industrial quantities. I
also have a friend who works at a local pizza delivery company who can
get you as many toppings as you like on a deep pan good through Friday
to Monday for just 99c.

My lumberjack cabin has six bedrooms which could prove difficult for
you to come to terms with. It also has a deck overlooking scenic Lake
Tahoe with no visual impairment from satellite dishes or chemical
toilet paraphernalia and a hot tub powered by natural wood chippings.
I also have a wood chipper which is fun to crank up on a Sunday
morning. I have also built an 18th century siege cannon in the back
yard, which is great for hurling old refrigerators into the lake.
Swimming in the lake is not really recommended because it's not only
rather cold but the large number of old refrigerators in the water
tends to make it rather dangerous. My old lodger came down with
tetanus which was a very messy affair. I don't think he'd kept up to
dates with his jabs, instead spending all of his disposable income on
subscriptions to Black Tail.

I spend my weekends skiing, snowmobiling and playing Laserquest, so I
tend to keep myself to myself. If this sounds interesting to you,
please send some pictures of your dogs and the undersides of your feet
(I have an allergy to athletes foot fungus).

Regards

Andy

H-man
05-13-2005, 05:39 AM
Roo takin it to a new level. Odds on Roo Anyone?

Big E
05-13-2005, 07:07 AM
And a new favorite emerges...

teledave
05-13-2005, 07:16 AM
I'm fucking crying here and people are looking at me strangely wondered what I am laughing at.

Roo, stepping it up a notch.

snow_slider
05-13-2005, 07:21 AM
The thread that keeps on giving just keeps getting better.

Any way possible to work all these individual contacts into some sort of group thing with her?

SquawMan
05-13-2005, 08:15 AM
Roo's was so well worded (LOL), but Punani getting rejected by a desperate fat whore has to be embarassing, especially after she warmed up to every other poster afterward

paging Rusty Nails....

jayfrizzo
05-13-2005, 08:33 AM
She sounds sincere and seems to have her head in the right place. I hope she finds a house, and bet she's fun in the sack.

Roo, your email was off the chain. "I don't think he'd kept up to date with his jabs..." Outstanding.

Core Shot
05-13-2005, 08:38 AM
She sounds sincere and seems to have her head in the right place. I hope she finds a house, and bet she's fun in the sack.


I dunno about fun in the sack - DO NOT LET HER GET ON TOP!!!

She has the physical attributes for a respectable blowjob, however.
that is the "right place" for her head.

gonzo
05-13-2005, 08:40 AM
crying crying...roo - so fucking funny.

13
05-13-2005, 08:45 AM
Punani getting rejected by a desperate fat whore has to be embarassing

What's embarassing is you not stepping up to bat after running your mouth like a lil' bitch nugget.

So then, are you the pitcher or catcher?

SquawMan
05-13-2005, 08:47 AM
What's embarassing is you not stepping up to bat after running your mouth like a lil' bitch nugget.

So then, are you the pitcher or catcher?



I'm happy to let you "macho" guys go after that fat chick :wink:

woohoo, she's a ton of fun!

13
05-13-2005, 08:52 AM
I'm happy to let you "macho" guys go after that fat chick :wink:

woohoo, she's a ton of fun!

Here's an idea:

Stop queefing up an otherwise fun/ny thread, mmmkay?

skifishbum
05-13-2005, 08:54 AM
The thread that keeps on giving just keeps getting better.

Any way possible to work all these individual contacts into some sort of group thing with her?

Don't forget about Bear.
The mutts got nutts and would probaly enjoy gittin sum too.

truth
05-13-2005, 08:56 AM
It's not that funny.

No, it's really not. Cruel is funny and this is not cruel enough.

SquawMan
05-13-2005, 08:56 AM
it would be funny if Yogachik asks her is she minds if she dresses like Xena Warrior Princess and chases her through the woods behind the house to a cave she has set up like a dungeon where they can have their monthly encounters. Whips and chains required.

tons of lesbian chicks in SF dress like Xena for the Bay to Breakers road race, so she's popular with them for some reason

could get an interesting reply

Stu Gotz
05-13-2005, 09:06 AM
I'm rather frightened of large dogs since a visit to Juarez
in 1997 when my shoes fell off.

Where does this stuff come from?

Core Shot
05-13-2005, 09:11 AM
Where does this stuff come from?

From the mind of a genius!!

A-wreck
05-13-2005, 09:12 AM
I just now looked at this thread for the first time. I totally missed the boat. :nonono2:

Tippster
05-13-2005, 09:28 AM
http://www.skylinc.net/~scarfone/bravo.gif

Always good when the master-craftsman gets out of the fucking car and does a little work.

Core Shot
05-13-2005, 09:30 AM
No, it's really not. Cruel is funny and this is not cruel enough.

It will be once Punani sends her the link to this thread :FIREdevil

teledave
05-13-2005, 09:31 AM
"Welcome to our newest member, honeyblondeDD"

Heh!

Viva
05-13-2005, 09:47 AM
Well, it looks like the gig's up for me. Ol' Jugs of Fun responded to my initial e-mail, but, so far, has ignored my follow-up. Maybe it was the pictures of Roo's rental from the Tahoe summit? Maybe she was insulted by the trailer park remark?

Anywho, she wrote me this:

hey there orlando...thank you so much for responding!

i am a single mom of a 4yr old...thus the not wishing to co-habitate--or 'see' anyone in the house.
im 5'11--over 6ft in heels, i would say husky, not fat. actually i wouldnt say husky either--perhaps 'zuftig'. pics attached. hope you enjoy!
i can get paperwork about the std free...we would have to meet and discuss before i spend the money though...
can you send pics of the property? i am looking to move soon, next couple of weeks. i am currently near idlwilde park (so we can meet first in reno if you prefer.)

smooches
j

I last night, I Wrote back with:

Dear Miss Honey,

I give my profuse apologies for reply so late. I am on call last night and had to go in for emergency and then today i must give grand rounds. I am very tire.

I attach a couple pictures of my condo. It is right on lake with nice view.

I like the pictures you send. No you are not husky like Sophia was but you look still like strong girl and you are taller than me which I like. I don’t know what is zuftig. It is German? I’m not familiar with the German, but I like the French and especially the Greek. You do too? I know we going to make a nice fuck together! I have other things to show you. Do you know the LS9000? I learn this from some dentist friends. It is very powerful and uses 6 D cells. You going to like.

I make the arrangements for the STD testing so you no have to pay. I have Columbian friend in Woman Health Clinic at hospital. She is also husky latin woman, but too husky. I think she like the girls more anyway but this is professional visit so is okay. When you go you ask for Dr. Lucia Maria Teressa Mariana Rosario Douchbago.

I never heard Idlwilde park but sounds like trailer park. I will not meet you in such a place. I like the Ceasars casino so maybe we should meet there. I am oncall for next two nights so after that I have the time to meet and have drinks. This weekend then?

I cannot wait to meet you! And please will you make me a favor and wear thong?

Orlando

Now that I'm out, i'm putting my money on Yoga. Between SuPu, Roo, and myself, I bet Honey is dying for some girl-on-girl action.

Core Shot
05-13-2005, 10:05 AM
When you go you ask for Dr. Lucia Maria Teressa Mariana Rosario Douchbago.


I think you blew it with that line.
everything else sounded like a typical over-sexed latin doctor of heterologous pathology ;)

yogachik
05-13-2005, 10:37 AM
Date: Fri, 13 May 2005 08:47:24 -0700 (PDT)
From: "wwmdincali" <wwmdincali@yahoo.com>
Subject: Re: tahoe rental exchange
To: "honey pie" <honeyblondedd@yahoo.com>
Jessica -
Attached is a picture taken of me last month during
Winterfest (the Tahoe Gay and Lesbian Ski Week).

About your picture - wow. You're a whole lotta woman!
I'm pleased to hear that you're open to a woman, I
really wasn't sure how you would respond.
Now, down to business: Are you looking to live in the
house completely rent free? Are you comfortable with
your son being exposed to the lesbian lifestyle?
Remember, I am not a one-woman woman, and you wouldn't
be the only woman in my life. As I told you, I use
the house primarily in the winter, so it would be
doubtful that I would even be there until next
November. However, things like utilities and cable
must be paid, and I like the idea of you staying there
if you take care of those bills.

Unfortunately, I am in Los Angeles and don't see a
break in the near future to meet you. But one of my
close friends (male) is an excellent judge of
character and knows my type to a T, and he lives in
Reno. I think the thing to do (once we have worked
out the "rent") is to have you meet him, and he will
give me the yay or nay.

Looking forward to hearing from you -
Elizabeth

SquawMan
05-13-2005, 10:42 AM
Yogachik, send her this link and see if she's into role playing and mid evil girly romps in the forest in costume

http://www.afterellen.com/TV/xena.html

tell her you have a horse named Ellen and want to ride her off into the Tahoe National Forest where you know of a hot spring big enough for two

this picture might help

http://home.earthlink.net/~wps-sdpix/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderpictures/apple.jpg

splat
05-13-2005, 10:43 AM
This is a setup, yes?

jayfrizzo
05-13-2005, 10:57 AM
Yoger, if she's savvy at all, you're hosed:

http://images.google.com/images?q=lesbian+wanted&hl=en

She's on Craigslist, so I wouldn't put it past her.

teledave
05-13-2005, 11:02 AM
Yoger, if she's savvy at all, you're hosed:

http://images.google.com/images?q=lesbian+wanted&hl=en

She's on Craigslist, so I wouldn't put it past her.

BTW: Link is NSFW unless you have SafeSearch turned on.

And if you have it turned off there are some rather shocking images that come up, like "I didn't know that they could that!"

yogachik
05-13-2005, 11:06 AM
Yoger, if she's savvy at all, you're hosed:

http://images.google.com/images?q=lesbian+wanted&hl=en

She's on Craigslist, so I wouldn't put it past her.
uh - yeah, that's where I got the pic. Easy to explain away - so not hosed. Anyway, I don't think she's at all savvy.

Splat - I think it's a police set-up, yes. By the way, Splat, you're my friend in Reno who I had in mind to meet her.

And SquawMan - give it up.

meatdrink9
05-13-2005, 11:07 AM
[praying roo gets a response]

truth
05-13-2005, 11:12 AM
[praying roo gets a response]


If she does not take that offer I might.

meatdrink9
05-13-2005, 11:29 AM
Miss honey,

I recently came across your posting on craigslist and I must say I became very intrigued. I work in a segment of the recording industry that actually specializes in working with young mothers like yourself. We just finished work on a new music video that has been tremendously successful. So successful in fact that we're already working on a follow-up effort in which I am responsible for casting.

I really like the style and attitude it would take to make a posting like that. If your looks match the personality of that text I'd be very interested in having you involved in our next production. Should we hire you for the shoot you'll have no problem financing a place in Tahoe. I suppose as part of the payment we could arrange the housing placement for you.

Below is a link to our latest video:

http://www.crackedouthiphop.com/vid/yomomsintheass.mov

I look forward to learning more about you and whether or not you might be a good candidate for this shoot.

Thanks,

Desmando Ruiz

truth
05-13-2005, 11:35 AM
^^^^ Now that's comedy.

Spicoli
05-13-2005, 11:47 AM
++Do You OWN a Place in Tahoe? Lets TRADE!!++
Reply to: anon-72472287@craigslist.org
Date: 2005-05-09, 1:27PM PDT


I am a young woman with dogs (2 smallish) planning to move to Tahoe in the next few weeks to month from reno. Do you own a place and would like to trade rent for a delicious encounter a couple of times a month? We would meet outside of the home. I am interested in a years lease and do not wish to co-habitate. I am tall and voluptuous, sensual and sincere. Do not smoke or drug. email me for pix...include info on the property. thank you!




* this is in or around Tahoe
* no -- it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
---------------------------------------------------------------------

Hi there Sweet Cheeks,

Now let me see if I have this clear. You want free rent for sex, twice a month? Twice, as in 2 times, a month, not 2 times a day, 2 times a month. Damn! You must be one sweet, hot piece of ass, ‘cause the way I figure, with rent being about $2k per month, that makes you a $1000 whore. So, with the price now established, what do I get for a grand? Personally, I’m kind of into some pretty weird shit. You mention that you have 2 dogs, would it be possible to watch you suck one of them off while I do you up the ass? You do take it up the ass I assume? How about gangbangs? I know of a rather large group of internet perverts that gather in the greater Tahoe area and we could arrange to make the worlds largest Cream Pie. This could possibly be recorded on video, since there are a number of professionals in that field that would be in attendance. This would be a win-win for the both of us ($$$) Are you skilled in the Japanese art of Bukkake (cum drinking), as this is also an area that we may choose to explore. Speaking of exploring, does fisting do anything for you? Personally, I like a couple well placed fingers up my ass right before I blow my load.

I have to admit, I received a copy of one of your pictures from an associate of mine (he contacted you as well regarding his Tahoe cabin), and I must say, you have got some big fat motherfucking fat tits. You animal! I would love to give you a Chili Dog!

Write back soon

Cornholio
05-13-2005, 11:55 AM
^^That's the email I've been waiting to see.

splat
05-13-2005, 11:56 AM
uh - yeah, that's where I got the pic. Easy to explain away - so not hosed. Anyway, I don't think she's at all savvy.

Splat - I think it's a police set-up, yes. By the way, Splat, you're my friend in Reno who I had in mind to meet her.

And SquawMan - give it up.

I meant it looked like I was being set up as the 'friend'.

Shit, I'm the one that might need back up.

Below Zero
05-13-2005, 12:00 PM
Oh my god Spicoli, I am dieing over here!

Maybe not greatest thread ever, but funniest thread ever?

KevinDineen
05-13-2005, 12:00 PM
All my money is on Yogachick.

hucksquaw
05-13-2005, 12:01 PM
++Do You OWN a Place in Tahoe? Lets TRADE!!++
Reply to: anon-72472287@craigslist.org
Date: 2005-05-09, 1:27PM PDT


I am a young woman with dogs (2 smallish) planning to move to Tahoe in the next few weeks to month from reno. Do you own a place and would like to trade rent for a delicious encounter a couple of times a month? We would meet outside of the home. I am interested in a years lease and do not wish to co-habitate. I am tall and voluptuous, sensual and sincere. Do not smoke or drug. email me for pix...include info on the property. thank you!




* this is in or around Tahoe
* no -- it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
---------------------------------------------------------------------

Hi there Sweet Cheeks,

Now let me see if I have this clear. You want free rent for sex, twice a month? Twice, as in 2 times, a month, not 2 times a day, 2 times a month. Damn! You must be one sweet, hot piece of ass, ‘cause the way I figure, with rent being about $2k per month, that makes you a $1000 whore. So, with the price now established, what do I get for a grand? Personally, I’m kind of into some pretty weird shit. You mention that you have 2 dogs, would it be possible to watch you suck one of them off while I do you up the ass? You do take it up the ass I assume? How about gangbangs? I know of a rather large group of internet perverts that gather in the greater Tahoe area and we could arrange to make the worlds largest Cream Pie. This could possibly be recorded on video, since there are a number of professionals in that field that would be in attendance. This would be a win-win for the both of us ($$$) Are you skilled in the Japanese art of Bukkake (cum drinking), as this is also an area that we may choose to explore. Speaking of exploring, does fisting do anything for you? Personally, I like a couple well placed fingers up my ass right before I blow my load.

I have to admit, I received a copy of one of your pictures from an associate of mine (he contacted you as well regarding his Tahoe cabin), and I must say, you have got some big fat motherfucking fat tits. You animal! I would love to give you a Chili Dog!

Write back soon

disturbing yet fucking hilarious

MacDaddy
05-13-2005, 12:23 PM
Yes I did LOL on that one ^

El Chupacabra
05-13-2005, 12:28 PM
I meant it looked like I was being set up as the 'friend'.

Shit, I'm the one that might need back up.

I've got a video camera, a digital still camera, and a 35mm Canon EOS with a zoom lens. I got your back, Splat.

Don't forget the helmet-cam.

splat
05-13-2005, 12:30 PM
You're on.

(Besides, it might be appropriate to have an attorney present)

yogachik
05-13-2005, 12:31 PM
Date: Fri, 13 May 2005 10:34:59 -0700 (PDT)
From: "honey pie" <honeyblondedd@yahoo.com>
Subject: Re: tahoe rental exchange
To: "wwmdincali" <wwmdincali@yahoo.com>


well...let me say that i am thrilled you have hair! i so dislike that 'butch' look (on most.)

i dont know exactly what you mean by the lesbian lifestyle...if you mean would i freak if you were at the house with a girlfriend, no. but if things got hot and heavy in the living room where he could walk in and see it--then i wouldnt be comfortable with it regardless if it was with a man or a woman. do you see what i mean? i dont have a problem with nudity, if anything it's a pain trying to keep clothes on the boy!
please know that i have no tolerance for drugs...i wont have it around my son.

i have no problem taking care of the utilities and cable...i am currently renting a 3 bedroom house in reno but am unable to save anything.
if you think you could elaborate on your concerns, please do.
i would be happy to meet with your friend.
best to you
jessica


**Splat - what's your schedule? :fmicon:

Core Shot
05-13-2005, 12:37 PM
I'm good to go. El Chewbacca?

Splat, you gotta meet her for drinks.
At least in this case you do not have to pretend you want sex with her, since Yogachick is on the hook for that one ;)

splat
05-13-2005, 12:42 PM
I ain't hittin that shit.

Tippster
05-13-2005, 12:42 PM
This Splat/DD meeting is now a moral imperative.

I bought your skis, dude. You owe me. ;)

El Chupacabra
05-13-2005, 12:43 PM
I'm good to go. El Chewbacca?

Just say when.

We need a pic of the two of you together. Maybe the kayak event this weekend? It's near Idlewild (i.e. near Jessica), lots of people around (i.e. no-one will notice me holding 3 cameras and following you around like a stalker), and the whitewater means great opportunity for a wet-T-shirt shot.

If we get this on for the kayak park event, I can make it Sunday anytime; Saturday is filled with other commitments already.

Can you wear a T-shirt that says "I'm a lesbian" for the meeting?

Below Zero
05-13-2005, 12:43 PM
I ain't hittin that shit.

Every once in a while, you just gotta step up and take one for the team! ;) :biggrin:

yogachik
05-13-2005, 12:57 PM
Date: Fri, 13 May 2005 11:07:58 -0700 (PDT)
From: "wwmdincali" <wwmdincali@yahoo.com>
Subject: Re: tahoe rental exchange
To: "honey pie" <honeyblondedd@yahoo.com>

Jess -

So here's the deal - I really can't go further with
this arrangement until my friend, Mike, meets you. I
trust him implicitly and he has to tell me that you
are real. If it's okay with you, I'd like him to
bring a camera so that he can send me a picture. I
(hope) to get a sense of you in a non-staged picture,
and also his impression of you. After all, this is a
major deal - placing my treasured 2nd home in a
strangers hands (found on the internet).

I'm glad to hear that you would not only be a sort-of
caretaker of my property, but that you will pay the
utilities, phone and cable. Then, of course, there's
the additional bonus of having a hot, full-bodied,
honey warming my bed in the cold winter months.

Mike is attending a kayak event at Idlewild Park
Sunday - I think that might work perfectly for
everyone.

Let me know -
E

gincognito
05-13-2005, 01:04 PM
I just know there is another message board out there with the opposite thread going on...

Sick and ashamed and happy (and can just imagine our counter-parts suggesting "Go with the lesbian!!"),
d.

El Chupacabra
05-13-2005, 01:18 PM
Let's see what honeyblondedd has to say about meeting up on Sunday. We should arrange a time that'll be mid-morning to mid-afternoon in order to get the peak crowds (so my camera stalking self doesn't stand out too much), and pick a meeting location that'll be near the kayak action so I can take pics in your direction (again for subtle photography action).

splat
05-13-2005, 01:18 PM
Mr. Hunt will be getting helmet cam footie of the kayak event while riding his bike next to the river. Perhaps she'd like to do a video message to her new benfactor/lover to cinch the deal with some liveaction lesbocharm.

Good with that Chewie? Helmetcam's a go, right?

PNWbrit
05-13-2005, 01:18 PM
I just know there is another message board out there with the opposite thread going on...

Sick and ashamed and happy (and can just imagine our counter-parts suggesting "Go with the lesbian!!"),
d.

or a police department squad room?

El Chupacabra
05-13-2005, 01:20 PM
Mr. Hunt will be getting helmet cam footie of the kayak event while riding his bike next to the river. Perhaps she'd like to do a video message to her new benfactor/lover to cinch the deal with some liveaction lesbocharm.

Good with that Chewie? Helmetcam's a go, right?

Mr. Hunt?

Splat - you bring a camera for the "posed" shot of you & Jessica. I'll just take pics from a distance.

Try to get some tongue action if the moment feels right.

Duker
05-13-2005, 01:21 PM
At the end of the date can the cameras come out and someone yell "you got punk'd!"?

SquawMan
05-13-2005, 01:23 PM
only 4,500 more posts until we surpass Bernhard's insane-o thread

come on, we can do it

yogachik
05-13-2005, 01:23 PM
Date: Fri, 13 May 2005 11:24:20 -0700 (PDT)
From: "honey pie" <honeyblondedd@yahoo.com>
Subject: Re: tahoe rental exchange
To: "wwmdincali" <wwmdincali@yahoo.com>

i live in an older neighborhood right behind idlewilde. perfect idea.
i will bring myself and my boy...pix are fine...we are kind of goofy sometimes.
let me know what time and where we can find him. sounds fun.
jessica

A-wreck
05-13-2005, 01:25 PM
AAAAWWWWW Shit.

splat
05-13-2005, 01:25 PM
Yeah, that'd be pretty brutal; hittin the slam for hurting the feelings of a woman soliciting acts of prostitution in exchange for housing.

Con: What're in for?

Me: I hurt a fat girl's feelings

edit:
Chewie, I'm Mr. Hunt, Mike Hunt. I figured if I brought my bike, I could wear the helmetcam, do a mutually consented video for her new girl landlady(what's your codename, Yoga?) and everyone can get a firsthand glimpse up close with sound. Whaddaya say?

Core Shot
05-13-2005, 01:25 PM
or a police department squad room?

that's where Splat meeting her is perfect.

He knows nothing about the sex for rental deal. NOTHING!

All he knows is a friend of his wants him to meet a potential roommate to rent her place in Tahoe.

Splat assumes it is a typical cash for rental, and says nothing about sex trading.

P.S. - if it really is 5-0, tell them to check this thread for evidence that none of the maggots is serious about closing the deal. There is NO intent here. Geesh, all you have to do is look at her picture to figure that one out.

Tippster
05-13-2005, 01:26 PM
WOOOOOHOOOOOO

IT'S ON!

snorkeldeep
05-13-2005, 01:27 PM
i hate that ive been working so much i missed this thread. mike hunt. classic.

tell hugh jass i said hi.

PNWbrit
05-13-2005, 01:29 PM
that's where Splat meeting her is perfect.

He knows nothing about the sex for rental deal. NOTHING!

All he knows is a friend of his wants him to meet a potential roommate to rent her place in Tahoe.

Splat assumes it is a typical cash for rental, and says nothing about sex trading.

P.S. - if it really is 5-0, tell them to check this thread for evidence that none of the maggots is serious about closing the deal. There is NO intent here. Geesh, all you have to do is look at her picture to figure that one out.

I know Splat isn't going to get busted for anything but if it's a sting can you imagine how excited they'd be getting about it.

dbp
05-13-2005, 01:32 PM
P.S. - if it really is 5-0, tell them to check this thread for evidence that none of the maggots is serious about closing the deal. There is NO intent here. Geesh, all you have to do is look at her picture to figure that one out.

I seriously doubt it is a sting, but I have a funny image of this thread being discussed in court now.

Tippster
05-13-2005, 01:32 PM
...There is NO intent here. Geesh, all you have to do is look at her picture to figure that one out.
There are MAGAZINES filled with women that look like her! A large contingent of men find that attractive.

I've seen much fatter, btw. She's more "reubenesque" than obese.

yogachik
05-13-2005, 01:35 PM
In case of a sting, I had to plant the following:

Subject: Re: tahoe rental exchange
To: "honey pie" <honeyblondedd@yahoo.com>

I will let you know later today as I work out the
logistics.
And no, there are no drugs in my life - I don't
tolerate them either. Also, will you be bringing the
dogs? I'd like him to see the dogs because I do worry
about the furniture.

Again, I'm intrigued by this idea, but not sold. So I
will rely on Mike's character assessment.

-E

splat
05-13-2005, 01:37 PM
I just know there is another message board out there with the opposite thread going on....

Yeah, somewhere, some young guy looking for housing with some chicks is getting hit on by transvestites plotting to put him in a dress.

daPig
05-13-2005, 01:40 PM
please know that i have no tolerance for drugs...i wont have it around my son.

Me screwing random internet dude/ chicks to whore myself for free living space is quite fine...but whatever you do keep the devil weed away from my boy!!! :eek:


** This thread has made my Friday afternoon :yourock:

onehotchili
05-13-2005, 01:41 PM
unbelievable.... this thread is on track to blow by 8000 views this afternoon.

honestly guys when i was on craigslist browsing for a new car, and i posted honeyblonde's ad here, i never thought it would generate this much interest. just classic. i knew i could count on the maggot community to collectively put their best foot forward. i haven't stopped laughing since this thread started.

in any case, i am actually planning on going to the Kayak park this Sunday to watch the festivites... was going to bring my wife and daughters. so... i can also add to the photographic documentary of this significant event in maggot history!!!

lemon boy
05-13-2005, 01:45 PM
Man- the cops are gonna be fucking stunned when OHC and Cubaka come running up with cameras yelling "NO NO NO This is an internet sting you fucking douchebag vice cops!!!!!!"

Clack
05-13-2005, 01:46 PM
Words are failing me. This thread is AWESOME!!

Standout work by Punani for getting the ball rolling and by Roo and Spicoli!!

Yoga, so devious with the believable hook. The actual meet up? Brilliant.

You all rock :yourock: :yourock: :yourock: This is the funniest shit I've read here in forever. Thanks all

edit - and I don't think it's a sting. They'd propably put it on the hooker page if that was the case. http://reno.craigslist.org/ers/

yogachik
05-13-2005, 01:47 PM
I will make it clear to honeypie/jessica that my friend, Mike, knows nothing of our discussions or rental arrangement - just that he's going to meet a potential renter.

and I agree with daPig, she's got some bizarre morals. then again, so do we all.

A-wreck
05-13-2005, 01:50 PM
.. was going to bring my wife and daughters.


" now girls, you see this lady over there talking to uncle splat? 'yes daddy.' You should never post on the internet that you want to exchange sex for rent like this lady. If I ever hear of you doing this you girls will be in big trouble"

timmay
05-13-2005, 02:01 PM
any other pnw mags want to road trip to reno for the show? who's making t-shirts and stickers for the sickest mini summit ever?

yogachik
05-13-2005, 02:02 PM
I'm now convinced she's real - no one is this good, or consistent

Date: Fri, 13 May 2005 12:06:47 -0700 (PDT)
From: "honey pie" <honeyblondedd@yahoo.com>
Subject: Re: tahoe rental exchange
To: "wwmdincali" <wwmdincali@yahoo.com>


i will bring them...sugar and bear...and devon and me. the dogs usually spend the day outside, the evenings inside with us, and then sleep in their 'room' which is my current pantry. they dont have run of the house. mainly because the previous tennants had many cats and my landlord wouldnt change the carpet...so they will spend all night all riled up and sniffing trying to find the cat. their room is basically a tiny hallway with a babygate. technically they could jump it but know better. the worst they do is 'consume' a teenage mutant ninja turtle every once in a while. they dont chew furniture or baseboards etc. they get rawhides and when im feeling rich, actual dog biscuits. when i found them (up in verdi) they were abused puppies with bellies swollen with gas from eating out of the garbage who were terrified of everyone. now they are mostly afraid of men. they are getting better with visits to the dogpark etc.

okay enough rambling...

best to you
jessica

LegoSkier
05-13-2005, 02:04 PM
in any case, i am actually planning on going to the Kayak park this Sunday to watch the festivites... was going to bring my wife and daughters. so... i can also add to the photographic documentary of this significant event in maggot history!!!
So was I actually. I think I'll just stand off to the side and laugh though.

SquawMan
05-13-2005, 02:06 PM
actually meeting this chick??? this is getting out of control

either the vice squad or her convict boyfriend will be there instead and if either get your license plate #, they can get your identity and use your emails to blackmail you

cops could arrest whoever shows up as an accomplis if only to get the identity of the email writer

all kidding aside.... be very careful

jimmy page
05-13-2005, 02:08 PM
Can't wait for the TR from the whitewater park.

This thread is all time.

A-wreck
05-13-2005, 02:10 PM
actually meeting this chick??? this is getting out of control

either the vice squad or her convict boyfriend will be there instead and if either get your license plate #, they can get your identity and use your emails to blackmail you

cops could arrest whoever shows up as an accomplis if only to get the identity of the email writer

all kidding aside.... be very careful


This thread would be a whole lot funnier if you would stop posting in it.

teledave
05-13-2005, 02:12 PM
actually meeting this chick??? this is getting out of control

either the vice squad or her convict boyfriend will be there instead and if either get your license plate #, they can get your identity and use your emails to blackmail you

cops could arrest whoever shows up as an accomplis if only to get the identity of the email writer

all kidding aside.... be very careful

It's been said before but, STFU! I'm no lawyer but I can't see any laws being broken here. The tit girl is naive, she's weeded out the obvious perverts (SuPu, Viva, Roo?) and decided that Yoga is safe. The whole female aspect lends security in this type of arrangement.

Don't be suck a killjoy, shut up and sit back to watch the carnage.

splat
05-13-2005, 02:12 PM
^^^^^^^^^Dude, that's some serial noids^^^^^^^^^^

berko
05-13-2005, 02:18 PM
This is so wrong on so many different levels.

But why does it feel so right?? :FIREdevil


I now have a much better grasp of the phrase 'sick and ashamed and happy.'

Duker
05-13-2005, 02:18 PM
Squawman= squareman

PNWbrit
05-13-2005, 02:20 PM
Splat - If this woman is for real you're going to have to name a ski after her

The "HoneyblondeDD" for a new super fat or The "Jessica" women's model?

You Gooch!
05-13-2005, 02:22 PM
Thought this might be appropriate for Splat as a preparation guide. Granted it's aimed at college students, so adjust as needed for situation.

From www.collegehumor.com:

Do your friends respect you too much? Is it your turn to “take one for the team?” Do you know what “slumpbuster” means? Then, my friend, you’re going to have to fuck a fat chick. Be careful, though; the road is filled with danger and pizza. You’re going to need a game plan, so trust a seasoned pro. I mean, uh, I had a friend write this. Because I would NEVER… uh… here you go.

STEP 1: Mental Preparation- The first, most important step is realizing what you’re about to do: Engage in dirty, dirty sex with an unattractive chick of at best mild acquaintance (NO friends; they know where to find you). It’s not going to be pretty, and chances are pretty good that you will not, ahem, finish. So why would you ever put yourself through such torture?

STEP 2: Be Pretty- I know, I know, why do they deserve to get a guy who put in the 10 minutes to put on slacks and a collared shirt? They don’t. That’s the whole point. You’re a bonus! You’ve got to sweep her off her feet, or at least get a severe hernia trying. Just do your hair or something. Whatever. Don’t worry too much about the clothes, but slobbing it only brings the night to an early (more merciful, yes) end.

STEP 3: On the Hunt- You’re at the bar; now go get her. Don’t get the one who’s so fat her face looks pinched and she’s all Chinese in the eyes; they’re too angry to be slutty. Get the one who’s in the clothes that are about 4 sizes too tight and who has an okay face, so after 6 beers you’ll start telling yourself things like, “If she just lost like 80 pounds, she’d be hot.” Let your wingmen have the ladies—you’re having pork for dinner tonight.

STEP 4: Say the Right Things- Remember: Hollywood chicks are too skinny; real chicks have curves; and whatever she’s planning to do in life is really cool. But be smooth about it. Even fat chicks can smell wuss from a mile away, and the only thing worse than nailing a fattie is getting turned down by one. You should be drunk by now. Drink faster.

STEP 5: Closing Time- Go somewhere to eat after the bar. Trust me, do it. Drunk fat chicks love food more than white people love CSI. Then, decide where you’re going next. If it’s her apartment, you’re set. Your apartment ought to be fine, but it makes Step 7 harder. Her dorm room? No sex, unless her roommates aren’t coming back. Avoid your dorm room at all costs, or prepare to be shamed. Mercilessly

STEP 6: Seal the Deal- Good luck, shooter. You may get the screwing of a lifetime. Right. And the Insane Clown Posse may go triple platinum. Let’s be realistic. It’s like wrestling a hairless Saint Bernard, right down to the slobber flying everywhere. If you don’t want a crushed hip, don’t let her be on top. And for fuck’s sakes, WRAP UP. The last thing you’ll ever want to do is get the herp from scraping the bottom of the barrel. That’s just tragic.

STEP 7: Run, She Won’t Catch You- If you’re at her place, leave ASAP. You, uh, had to be somewhere. However, if you’re at your place, you’re going to have to cuddle until she leaves; there’s nothing worse than an angry lowland gorilla with free reign in your dorm/living room. She may eat your X-Box. As soon as she leaves on her own accord, begin avoiding her. If she doesn’t have your number, no problems. If she does, you deserve it. You deserve the desperation hurtling your way like a big, sweaty meteorite with bad highlights. If you share a class with her, drop it. Holding hands in public with your conquest is like showing up to a job interview with shit all over your face.

And there you have it. You’ve just scarred yourself for life, and you’ve given girls another reason to “hate boys.” But past that, you’ve technically gotten laid, you’ve expanded your worldview, and you’ll most assuredly never, ever take a hot chick for granted again.

Core Shot
05-13-2005, 02:25 PM
Awesome second post Gooch!
Way to come out of the lurking zone for a zinger
laughing my ass off

H-man
05-13-2005, 02:29 PM
Yeah, somewhere, some young guy looking for housing with some chicks is getting hit on by transvestites plotting to put him in a dress.
I was thinking about Tuckerman Ravine this Sunday, but now I'll be sitting at home hitting the refresh button waiting for the TR.

Well done all involved. I think she is real for sure.

El Chupacabra
05-13-2005, 02:38 PM
Chewie, I'm Mr. Hunt, Mike Hunt. I figured if I brought my bike, I could wear the helmetcam, do a mutually consented video for her new girl landlady(what's your codename, Yoga?) and everyone can get a firsthand glimpse up close with sound. Whaddaya say?

OK -- so should I show up w/ cameras or not?

yogachik
05-13-2005, 02:45 PM
Date: Fri, 13 May 2005 12:55:28 -0700 (PDT)
From: "wwmdincali" <wwmdincali@yahoo.com>
Subject: Re: meeting
To: "honey pie" <honeyblondedd@yahoo.com>
Jess -

What is a good time for you? And, exactly where would
you meet? I don't know that area well at all and
would like to give Mike some specific time and place.
He'll be there on his bike. By the way, I've told
Mike nothing about our possible arrangement, I just
told him he's meeting a potential renter (and knows
that Caroline is moving out this weekend, so the house
will now sit empty). I've emailed him your picture so
he will easily spot you - I've also emailed a couple
other friends who will be there (by coincidence), to
see if they can find you. Since I can't meet you, I
hope you don't mind being checked out by my friends.

I will say this, though - I'm concerned about Sugar
and Bear and chewing Ninja Turtles - I have a
Giacometti reproduction that I treasure and it looks a
little like a boy's toy. Perhaps I'd just remove it.
I'll wait to hear what Mike says about the dogs.

-Elizabeth

jimmy page
05-13-2005, 02:51 PM
(and knows
that Caroline is moving out this weekend, so the house
will now sit empty

nice touch

divegirl
05-13-2005, 02:55 PM
So was I actually. I think I'll just stand off to the side and laugh though.
You HAVE to!!! Do it! After you drop me off at the airport, meet up with splat before honeybunny gets there and then hide and take pictures!

This thread RULES!!!

Yoga, you are a true scam artist!! ;)

freshie247
05-13-2005, 02:58 PM
I hope she finds a house, and bet she's fun in the sack.


I can see it now on a TV news flash.

"Four seemingly unrelated suspicious deaths in the Tahoe area have been linked to an online forum.It appears that all four of the victims were members of the TGR site.Each was found suffocated,with milk on their lips & stretchmarks on their mouths.

A woman new to the area has been taken into custody."