Best Gaper qoute of the weekend?

**PNWbrit** · 03-17-2017, 05:15 PM

Originally Posted by flowing alpy

I like her.

I always tell people stevens is awesome.

**east or bust** · 03-17-2017, 05:26 PM

Originally Posted by DasBlunt

YeAH, people like to have fun....try it sometime....gaper.

Originally Posted by Soups

Straightlining steeps...so gaper. Wtf?

straight lining while completely out of control… yes gapers. did I really have to spell that out?

**Gaperious Basterd** · 03-17-2017, 05:26 PM

Originally Posted by flowing alpy

I like her.

Good. You two should go out. You can both gape. And stay off the chairlifts.

When u divorce her cuz you couldn't get a word in, can't say nobody told u so!!!

'Course, with that rhaspy smokacious voice, well never mind.

And you both know you don't know where the moguls are kept in the summer! Ignorance is bliss...

**Gaperious Basterd** · 03-17-2017, 05:28 PM

Originally Posted by PNWbrit

I always tell people stevens is awesome.

Do u gape on the down low? Keep it the closet?

**Benny Profane** · 03-17-2017, 10:02 PM

Never thought I'd see the day when some young girl was texting while navigating one of those traverses at Alta. This one was on the Germania return.

**Benny Profane** · 03-17-2017, 10:06 PM

Originally Posted by bigdude2468

Rear Entry boot guy's die with their boots on. A very close skier friend refused to replace his Salomon SX-90 boots. Was skiing new skis every couple of years, had plenty of money to buy new but just loved those red boots. We always gave him crap about the boots and eventually he got testy about it so we had to drop the ribbing. He became ill and subsequently passed away. When we went to the wake there were photos of his ski trips, his helmet was on top of the casket etc, but no sign of the boots. I asked his daughter where the boots are?, "dad's wearing them".

I was in the Sports Loft here in Salt Lake City a couple of years ago, essentially just a boot fitter. An old guy came in with five rear entry boots. Different colors, not matched pairs, looked like five random boots. He was dropping them off so that they would have an inventory of spare parts when he needed his boots repaired. He had found them on Ebay, some at Deseret Industries (Goodwill) and garage sales.

Check out the Dick Bass "memorial" sorta trophy case in the Snowbird tram lodge on the second floor. Those boots are in the lower right corner.

**zartagen** · 03-17-2017, 11:08 PM

Originally Posted by TahoeJ

That's awesome. Although I'm not sure I'd want to spend eternity in my ski boots as I'm usually happy to get them off after several hours! ;-)

Clearly you've never experienced the luxury of rear entries

**Harry** · 03-17-2017, 11:16 PM

Originally Posted by Benny Profane

Never thought I'd see the day when some young girl was texting while navigating one of those traverses at Alta. This one was on the Germania return.

Wait, what... Benny is an Alta local now ???????????

**Benny Profane** · 03-18-2017, 12:07 AM

I am a local of the world this year, young man.

**jonesy** · 03-18-2017, 06:26 AM

Would you be a local at our humble hill Benny? You can go rear entry.

**yeahman** · 03-18-2017, 10:11 AM

Originally Posted by PNWbrit

I always tell people stevens is awesome.

Couple of Stevens locals in the tram line at Big Sky a few days ago were going on about how much Stevens rules over Alpental. And over Baker too. I've skied them all but kept my opinions to myself.

**old goat** · 03-18-2017, 10:48 AM

Originally Posted by TahoeJ

That's crazy. On two levels. Obviously the whole being able to survive without food for that long, but also the sheer boredom factor of pure solitary confinement.

That's awesome. Although I'm not sure I'd want to spend eternity in my ski boots as I'm usually happy to get them off after several hours! ;-)

I think they go into a Zen state, where the meaning of life becomes clear and they become one with the universe. Or maybe they just sleep.

If anyone decides to reissue the SX series--a la Flexon's--this would be a perfect ad "So comfortable you can wear them for eternity."

**raueda1** · 03-18-2017, 06:51 PM

Told to me by a liftie working at Park City: "So this guy asks me 'What do they do with all the moguls in the summer?' "
Assuming that you know what moguls are, it's difficult for me to even understand the question.

**Gaperious Basterd** · 03-18-2017, 07:07 PM

You can tell them they are BOSU Balls and are loaned to Planet Fitness in the summer.

**TahoeJ** · 03-18-2017, 07:22 PM

Quoting the most common gaper quotes is becoming the new gaper quote.

**old goat** · 03-18-2017, 10:05 PM

Originally Posted by TahoeJ

Quoting the most common gaper quotes is becoming the new gaper quote.

Are those water skis?
I hate powder.

True gaper quotes are rare--maybe one every few pages, but they're worth waiting for. "Dad's wearing them" made my season.

**pfluffenmeister** · 03-18-2017, 11:55 PM

Saw a guy wearing a Teton Gravity Research baseball cap at the grocery store tonight.

I ask him: "Change for a nickel?"
He says: "What?"
Me [/shrug]: "Nothing ... I just saw your hat"

Which was fitted ... WTF?!?

Dude looked just like a dentist. (really)
Probably had DPS's on the car rack.

**~mikey b** · 03-19-2017, 12:25 AM

I was offered change tonight. Not a dentist

**irratator** · 03-19-2017, 01:36 AM

Originally Posted by pfluffenmeister

Saw a guy wearing a Teton Gravity Research baseball cap at the grocery store tonight.

I ask him: "Change for a nickel?"
He says: "What?"
Me [/shrug]: "Nothing ... I just saw your hat"

Which was fitted ... WTF?!?

Dude looked just like a dentist. (really)
Probably had DPS's on the car rack.

Found it new in his Waiting Room?
Got it at a Vid Premiere?
Gift from another Jerry?

**WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot** · 03-19-2017, 08:16 AM

Originally Posted by TahoeJ

Quoting the most common gaper quotes is becoming the new gaper quote.

may i quote you on that ?

**TahoeJ** · 03-19-2017, 08:25 AM

Originally Posted by WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

may i quote you on that ?

Absolutely. Just one question though: are those water skis?

**jonesy** · 03-19-2017, 08:38 AM

What altitude do the deer change to elk?

**Skistack** · 03-19-2017, 10:36 AM

Not sure if this was a gaper move or a stoned out of your gourd move.

Twenty-something snowboard couple in front of me getting on a double chair. So the girl slides up to load, but the guy doesn't move. The lifty looks at the guy and says, "It's OK, you're allowed to ride up together." Guy slides forward and JUMPS onto the chair, wrapping both arms around bar on the side that attaches the chair to the rope.

He rides the whole way up half sitting on the chair, half hanging onto the bar. So we get to the top, and right before the offload ramp, the guy lets go of his death grip and jumps off the chair, hitting the ramp sloping downhill and slides backwards under the chair.

Lifty hit the kill switch with a WTF just happened? gesture. Guy yells up, "It's OK, I'm clear!".

**old goat** · 03-19-2017, 10:50 AM

Originally Posted by pfluffenmeister

Saw a guy wearing a Teton Gravity Research baseball cap at the grocery store tonight.

I ask him: "Change for a nickel?"
He says: "What?"
Me [/shrug]: "Nothing ... I just saw your hat"

Which was fitted ... WTF?!?

Dude looked just like a dentist. (really)
Probably had DPS's on the car rack.

If he paid $30 for it he's a gaper, even if he can land 100 foot airs. If he found it, stole it, got it for a buck at the thrift he's not, even if he's never worn a pair of skis in his life. If he wears it while he's drilling your teeth, get a new dentist.

**east or bust** · 03-19-2017, 11:03 AM

Overheard from skier on slope while riding the lift at Roundtop in PA, after 3 inches of dense snow:

"No wonder why everyone's going so slow, it's mogul city out here!"

…there were no moguls yet, the snow was merely a bit tracked