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Thread: The Martini Appreciation Thread

  1. #1
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    The Martini Appreciation Thread

    It took me many years to become an addict, but damn these things are tasty. I got there slowly. It began with Gin and Tonics. Then I began frequenting a bar with a kickass bartender that gives you your moneys worth. Barely a splash of tonic. Then I started having actual martinis at a buddys house. Now I am hooked.

    1) Beefeater Gin

    2) crushed ice, chilled shaker and chilled glass.

    3) Shaken, not stirred, duh. Its the agitation or "bruising" of the gin that makes the magic.

    4) Vermouth is for pussies.

    5) a twist of lemon if you have it, but otherwise sit back and relax and enjoy the buzzzzz.

    FKNA!

    what floats your martini boat? I hope it doesnt involve appletinis or some other faggknob crappy drinks with umbrellas in them.
    Kill all the telemarkers
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  2. #2
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    your new avatar
    Elvis has left the building

  3. #3
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    coreshot
    are you new here?
    seriously what the fuck \
    we have many booze soaked threads in he padded room
    martinis addressed as well!

    secondly,
    straight beefeater gin
    eee gad man.
    that is no martini, cold or not
    a cocktail is multiple ingrediants
    you want cold straight gin then its that
    "give me some beefeater bruise it and give it to me straight."
    you want a fucking martini, it requires vermouth
    dry super dry does not make you core.
    try a cocktail
    its good.
    I had 2 tonight at the Barclay
    and beefeater
    come one kid wake up
    I piss better gin drunk on scotch

    and another thing.
    you are not james fucking bond,
    if you get a real old school bar tender who uses a muddler and a cocktail spoon, aprreciate it.
    a stirred maritin strained
    $
    well stirred that is.
    seriously
    tried both?
    I doubt it.
    I bet your bar tender frind is under 40 and makes his cocktails with a pint glass and a steell shaker
    all his cocktails in that same nasty shell
    mmm margarita in my martini,
    lemon twists are good
    but so are olives, so are onions, mix it up.
    learn before you post

  4. #4
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    Me no likey gin.

    There, I said it again.

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by Woodsy View Post
    dry super dry does not make you core.
    If that's the way you like it is it OK?
    Elvis has left the building

  6. #6
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    Fine, but don't call it a martini. It needs Vermouth to have the moniker.

    Me, I like Chopin on the rocks dirty w/2 olives. I don't give a fuck if it's "core" or not -- Vermouth makes my stomach flip.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by cj001f View Post
    If that's the way you like it is it OK?
    if you like straight gin or straight vodka, cool.
    but much like long skis and race stock bindinge, many do it just for perceptions sake
    I think 80+% of those that ask for a " super dry dont even look at the vermouth sjaken not stirred martini" have not tried very many well made martinis
    seriously, its a cocktail for a reason.
    i heart bourbon but I dont walk into bars and ask for a super dry manhattan.
    I ask for straight bourbon.
    if I want it bruiesed I ask for it that way.
    Last edited by Woodsy; 05-30-2007 at 10:31 PM.

  8. #8
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    thank you. thank you very much!

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tippster View Post
    Fine, but don't call it a martini. It needs Vermouth to have the moniker.
    can I call it a churchill martini?

    there's a ton of variations on drinks that have appropriate names - but order it by the appropriate name and you are the asshole lecturing the bartender
    Elvis has left the building

  10. #10
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    once in a bar upstate NY when I still lived in UT I asked my then GF what she wanted, she answered as usual, "a greyhound"
    I ordered a greyhound
    bartender said WTF is a greyhound.
    I said you know vodka and grapefruit
    he says, well then how come you didnt order a vodka grapefruit

    what is lecturning a bartender varies bartender to bartender.
    if you ask for a martini world wide you will get gin and vermouth unless you "lecture" otherwise
    again if you want straight gin/vodka just asked for it,
    chilled & up.
    that works anywhere and lectures noone

  11. #11
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    Never heard of a greyhound as such....but put some salt on the rim and it's a salty dog.

    Beefeater - please. There are so many better gins.

    And woodsy is right. A martini is a martini - not straight gin (or vodka). not that there is anything wrong with that.

    Personally I like the sapphire/vermouth/olive. I also like ice cold Grey Goose or Chopin with a twist, no vermouth - but that is not a martini, it is vodka with a twist.

    And all those chocolate and apple sissy drinks are done. The 90's are over, and they were for sissy's then.
    Living vicariously through myself.

  12. #12
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    Olives are gross.
    ROBOTS ARE EATING MY FACE.

  13. #13
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    Does anyone use fancy vermouths? There is one from Quady Vineyards in California that has won a bunch of awards, for whatever that's worth. Never had it, but dated the dudes daughter.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Woodsy View Post
    coreshot
    are you new here?
    seriously what the fuck \
    we have many booze soaked threads in he padded room
    martinis addressed as well!
    What an uptight grumpy old fart you are!

    Exellent cunting of an attempt to have a martini stoke thread.

    I would gladly have listened to some of your sugestions, but your just too much of a sour cunt to take you seriously.

    To the others, thanks for your sugestions. Yes, I have had them with vermouth. Never tried funky designer vermouth - maybe that was the problem. I could handle an occasional olive, but whenever I do I find myself wishing I had a real olive and not some waxy pimento crap filled drink olive (clearly I haven't had the designer olives either).

    As for beefeter, its been my gin lately. Get over it.

    PS - I actually searched for martini before starting this thread, you crotchety old douchenozzle, and there was not a martini stoke thread. Thanks to you, there still isn't.

    PPS - not that wikipedia is all nowing, but I actually learned more there than I did from you

    One might prepare a martini by waving the cap of a vermouth bottle over the glass, or observing that "there was vermouth in the house once." Winston Churchill chose to forgo vermouth completely, saying that the perfect Martini involved pouring a glass full of cold gin and looking at a bottle of vermouth. General Patton suggested pointing the gin bottle in the general direction of Italy. Alfred Hitchcock's recipe called for five parts gin and "a quick glance at a bottle of vermouth." Ernest Hemingway liked to order a "Montgomery", which was a martini mixed at a 15:1 gin-to-vermouth ratio (these supposedly being the odds Field Marshall Montgomery wanted to have before going into battle). In a classic bit of stage business in the 1955 play Auntie Mame, sophisticated pre-adolescent Patrick Dennis offers a martini, which he prepares by swirling a drop of vermouth in the glass, then tossing it out before filling the glass with gin. Similarly, in the 1958 movie Teacher's Pet, Clark Gable mixes a martini by turning the bottle of vermouth upside-down before running the moistened cork around the rim of the glass and filling it with gin. Surrealist director Luis Buñuel was another supporter of the drink, including his personal recipe into his Oscar-winning 1972 film Le charme discret de la bourgeoisie and in his memoirs, which consists basically of "coating the cubes", a method of adding the flavor of vermouth by pouring the vermouth into a shaker of ice, then pouring it out before adding gin. A scene cut from the theatrical version of M*A*S*H suggested that a bottle of vermouth should 'last an entire war.' Also, atomizers similar to those used for perfume were sometimes used to dispense a token amount of vermouth.

    PPPS - I dont disdain vermouth just to be "core" - I really dont like it. But apparantly I dont know what I like. Thanks for the edumacation.
    Kill all the telemarkers
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  15. #15
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    Hendricks Gin. best effin Gin I have ever had. period.
    Click. Point. Chute.

  16. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by f2f View Post


    thank you. thank you very much!
    Yes.
    I do enjoy the Sapphire as well.

    Excellent thread stokeage.
    Kill all the telemarkers
    But they’ll put us in jail if we kill all the telemarkers
    Telemarketers! Kill the telemarketers!
    Oh we can do that. We don’t even need a reason

  17. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by bossass View Post
    Olives are gross.
    Try stuffing them with Blue Cheese or Feta
    Quote Originally Posted by wintermittent
    And furthermore. What is up with turkey bacon? Healthy bacon? Unpossible.
    Quote Originally Posted by snowsprite
    That is like masturbation. People resort to it when they can't have the real thing!

  18. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by Core Shot View Post
    What an uptight grumpy old fart you are!...
    He prefers "curmudgeon."

    ...and I don't like Vermouth either.... again.

  19. #19
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    Blue cheese stuffed olives (self-stuffed) or some good cocktail onions (AKA Gibson Martini) are the fruits of choice for my 'tinis!

    I like to skip the Vermouth all together. Why bother...truly CORE!!!
    Teton AT
    Live to Ski!

  20. #20
    sledneckripper Guest

    Thumbs down

    Martinis are for yuppies, fags, and pretty boys.

  21. #21
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    Shut up and drink your light beer, Sally. Not much else that says "I drink" than clear, cold liquor with an olive or onion. Twists, however, are gay.

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    Gin is gross.

  23. #23
    sledneckripper Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by Tippster View Post
    Shut up and drink your light beer, Sally. Not much else that says "I drink" than clear, cold liquor with an olive or onion. Twists, however, are gay.

    Shut up and drink your fancy schmancy yuppy drinks you hob knobber. Geezus, what happened to ordering a shot of tequila with a PBR at the bar?? None of this gay overpriced cocktail bullshit.

  24. #24
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    Heh, you can always count on getting woodsy all riled up with the concept of a very dry martini.

    I of course prefer my martinis thusly:
    Very dry ket one* martini, dirty.

    Some tips: almost noplace has good olives but for the home game, buy some from the olive bar at the grocery and a SECOND little tub of just the brine, which they won't charge you for and then you can recombine for storage. I'm partial to the almond stuffed olives myself.

    Try to remember the golden rule:
    Martinis are like breasts, one is not enough and three is too many.


    *when I'm out, we rarely drink K1 at home.
    "It is not the result that counts! It is not the result but the spirit! Not what - but how. Not what has been attained - but at what price.
    - A. Solzhenitsyn

  25. #25
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    Attention You Posers!!!!!

    Let me put a few things straight....

    1. A martini needs vermouth. Noilly-Pratt rules.

    2. The new best gin:

    3. Olive or twist...your preference.

    4. Any "martini" which contains apple or other fruit or sweet flavorings is gay. Any man who drinks such concoctions and claims they are "martinis" is a felch monkey. You want to have a cosmo or apple flavored vodka...fine. Just don't call it a martini.

    5. Other herbal liquors may be substituted for vermouth...Green Chartreuse, for example.

    6. Bartenders who shake martinis to death and cause little ice chips to get into the glass should be butt raped by a kangaroo.

    This thread is now complete. There is no need for further posting.
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