Thread: The Evolution of Heartcarving. Enter HEARTSLARVING

Welcome, Comrades, to a new era.

An era where powder turns are possible, given that the pow is blower and your balls are made of kevlar reinforced concrete.

An era where our glorious fartbags will be accepted universally and worn by all. All the Time. By Law.

An era where you never need to ride backseat to float in the pow. Unless it is wet pow. Or crusty.

See the future laid out before us- A future of wider, rockered Snowlerblades, their blueprints carved into stone by Kim Jong the Illest Himself.



Leave behind you the old ways of the heartcarve, and free your soul. Only the simpleminded would choose to "carve" upon the rails of oppression, and ignore the uncontrollable freedom and bliss of The HeartslarveThe Heartslarve is Destiny. It cannot be taught, as it uses muscle groups that can only be taken from Dying unicorns and sewn directly into the hearts of the worthy. Pray that someday you may be worthy of this. Until then, you can only train for Alaska.

Below, view the Unremorseful Gnar slaying of SnowlerJesus. The turns, slarved without pity into the soul of the mountain, all at once destroying it and rebuilding it to His standards. Study this revelation, and give thanks to SnowlerJesus



Hail Satan, Hail SnowlerJesus
Prepare For The Revelution.

The Committee is pleased with your choice of liturgical music.

Gloria in excelsis Deo et in terra pax hominibus bonae voluntatis. Laudamus te, benedicimus te, adoramus te, glorificamus te, gratias agimus tibi

Introducing, the new Benny Profane pro-model!

Any word on a crapon fiber "tour" version?

Iceman slarves in jeans.

Now THOSE are some tight trees.

Originally Posted by systemoverblow'd

Introducing, the new Benny Profane pro-model!

FTW.

Sent from my ADR6425LVW using TGR Forums

what song is that?
reminds me of french foreign-exchange student friends of mine from FLC days!

Bongo Bong by Manu Chao.

Originally Posted by systemoverblow'd

Introducing, the new Benny Profane pro-model!

This made me laugh also