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06-01-2011, 12:43 AM #1
TR: Awaiting the Rapture in the Alaska Range
I am not a religious person but after receiving news that a rapture was coming, which would subsequently kick off something called "Seven Years of the Great Tribulation," I decided it might be a sovereign time to await the end of days in a remote glaciated mountain range. If 4 decades of resolute atheism turned out to be a dead end road of bad conclusions and the triumph of Jesus was at hand, at least I could get some turns and reflect on my folly before being transferred hotly into the care of Satan. To that end, a crew rallied. . . .
Wendigo. . . .
Telelebowski. . .
JoeStrummer. . . .
PoopGhost (notice SlimFast shakes in foreground. One of these each morning powered Telelebowski for approximately 4 hours). . . .
We landed in Little Switzerland after laying around Talkeetna all afternoon hoping to get a weather window. We landed on the glacier on about 12 inches of fresh snow and made camp . . .
Then it was time for skiing. PoopGhost coiling the rope at the nearest col, which we abused like a Phi Mu for several days since it was close and the snow stayed great.
Wendigo and Telelebowski enjoying the fresh. . .
We got probably 18 inches over our time in Little Switzerland, which kept things fresh but safe.
And there were plenty of corn cycles, as well. . . .
Wendigo (Ben) digs a pit on a 40 degree slope I am sure has a name but we dubbed it "Ben's SuperCouloir." a 1500 foot run to the glacier below. It took a lot of work to get an isolated column to fail.
PoopGhost enjoys the first few turns into the SuperCouloir. Did everyone get a deal on a green jacket in Talkeetna or what?
Scale in the Alaska Range is a difficult thing to convey with mediocre camera skills. Everything was huge and turned a 70-200 into a 17-40 lens! I took several pictures of Foraker under bluebird skies but none of the pics really convey how massive it really is. Here is our camp on the Pika Glacier, where we didn't see another soul for 5 nights!
After a few long days of skiing and digging and melting snow and constant sunlight and staring across the Kahiltna at the Infinite Spur, we were starting to get a bit punchy. I timed PoopGhost and it was at least 45 seconds before he realized the book wasn't making any sense . . . .
Flight traffic was fairly minimal and it was so peaceful that for a while we began to believe The Rapture had actually occurred. However, on the 5th day TAT sent the Beaver to bump us over to the Ruth Glacier, and it was confirmed by our pilot that He had not visited mankind with His Judgment.
So we headed for Don Sheldon Mtn House in the Ruth Gorge for the next five days.
Ben deserves props for his magnificent food prep skills (not to mention his machine-like bootpacking talents) - left to me and Telelebowski it would've been SlimFast and Gu and bourbon for a week. But Ben introduced us to the miracle of pre-cooked bacon, which we added to virtuallly everything. Here he is grilling steaks over a wood fire, Mtn House and the Ruth in the background. . . .
There was some skiing to be had but the snow was going isothermic and there was no freezing at night. Still, here are Wendigo and Telelebowski headed up a line on the Gargoyle. . .
And what comes up, must come down. . . .
And we had some good times on Telemark Hill. . .
There was evidence that SkiFishBum had been here before! . . .
And after living on the glacier it was nice to be able to get a wood stove going and enjoy the provisions in cushy comfort . . . .
Touring was awesome, if a bit time-consuming. Anything you could see out the windows would take at least two hours to reach! Here is PoopGhost headed down the Ruth, Moose's Tooth in the background. . .
And here are Wendigo and Telelebowski headed for Dickey and 747 Pass. . .
Two of us slept in our tents, which kept the hut freer for debauchery. Here is my command center a short drunken stagger below the Mtn House, with Denali in the background. . .
Overall, an awesome trip. Even though there was no Rapture, there isn't anything better than having fun in the hills with friends. Then again, Websters defines rapture as "the state of being transported by lofty emotion, a feeling of ecstacy." So perhaps there was a rapture, afterall!
Our only error was inexplicably low-balling our estimated beer consumption - fortunately our shortage was easily remedied by skiing down to the Ruth landing strip and having a pilot drop us a few cases of Miller High Life on his return with an assload of Japanese tourists! That combined with box wine left behind in prior seasons and the discovery that Triple Sec of unknown vintage and Tang are a tolerable combo, kept us going over the last couple days!"Buy the Fucking Plane Tickets!"
-- Jack Tackle
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06-01-2011, 04:46 AM #2Registered User
- Join Date
- Dec 2007
- Posts
- 285
man that looks good...
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06-01-2011, 04:57 AM #3
My prefered poison for backcountry adventures, particularly when hiking in, is vodka mixed with water flavoured with gatoraid powder. I recommend all 3 flavours and a packet or 2 of tang to avoid getting bored with one flavour. and NEVER underestimate the amount of alcohol needed for these trips!!!
also ... nice trip, thanks for the TR ...We, the RATBAGGERS, formally axcept our duty is to trigger avalaches on all skiers ...
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06-01-2011, 05:12 AM #4
Epic trip!
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06-01-2011, 06:04 AM #5
You are all now my favorite people on the internet.
Life is not lift served.
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06-01-2011, 06:13 AM #6
that's one hell of a trip
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06-01-2011, 07:23 AM #7Registered User
- Join Date
- Feb 2007
- Location
- Colorado
- Posts
- 3,004
The Pika/Little Switzerland is an amazing spot, stoked for you for getting to do some good skiing there.
"High risers are for people with fused ankles, jongs and dudes who are too fat to see their dick or touch their toes.
Prove me wrong."
-I've seen black diamonds!
throughpolarizedeyes.com
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06-01-2011, 07:44 AM #8
JoeStrummer-
expect an email from me at some point hte the distant (ut maybe not so distant) future to get beta on ski lines up there
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06-01-2011, 07:54 AM #9
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06-01-2011, 08:14 AM #10
My retinas are forever burnt with the image of that sasquatch in his underwear and winter boots.
Thanks for that.
On the plus side, that looks amazing...I feel like a lazy, spoiled slacker for doing AK on the complete other end of the spectrum in the Heli.You should have been here yesterday!
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06-01-2011, 08:33 AM #11
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06-01-2011, 08:34 AM #12
well done, gentlemen.
"fuck off you asshat gaper shit for brains fucktard wanker." - Jesus Christ
"She was tossing her bean salad with the vigor of a Drunken Pop princess so I walked out of the corner and said.... "need a hand?"" - Odin
"everybody's got their hooks into you, fuck em....forge on motherfuckers, drag all those bitches across the goal line with you." - (not so) ill-advised strategy
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06-01-2011, 08:51 AM #13
Looks awesome! Pissed I couldn't make it for this one!
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06-01-2011, 08:58 AM #14
That was a fantastic trip report! Its great to see how its done. Thanks.
Keep your tips up and always remember to unhook your pack from the chair...
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06-01-2011, 09:41 AM #15
Great trip guys. Nothin beats a little bit of kickass in the morning.
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06-01-2011, 10:06 AM #16
FKNA sick stuff fellas.
Originally Posted by DoWork
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06-01-2011, 12:31 PM #17
Are you sure you didn't get raptured? That sure looks like heaven.
I agree it is a constitutional right for Americans to be assholes...its just too bad that so many take the opportunity...iscariot
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06-01-2011, 12:40 PM #18
There should be some more pix on the way as we get our collective shit together. We had I think 6 cameras going between the 4 of us... in some instances (please see above pic of me in my skivvies) that was probably too much documentation.
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06-01-2011, 01:04 PM #19
Joe Strummer's odd and inexplicable TR title selection means that he is now numbered among the people that annoy me.
More pics:
Unnamed AK mini-golf lines
Plane with Foraker
In Europe there would be 12 huts out here. We saw 2 people in 5 days.
Very peaceful.
And then we started skiing.
The Bunny Slope.
And it was good.
I've been a lot of places, but the Ruth Gorge is one of the most spectacular things I've ever seen. Impossible to capture in pictures. Absolutely incredible.
And if any one ever gets the chance to share a trip with JoeStrummer, Poop Ghost, or Wendigo, I guarantee you're in for a great time. As solid a group of guys as you'll find made it an absolutely off the charts awesome trip.
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06-01-2011, 01:10 PM #20not feeling real witty...
- Join Date
- Jan 2009
- Location
- AKeveryday
- Posts
- 588
Nice work! Thanks for sharing!!
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06-01-2011, 01:28 PM #21
meh... lacked POV
This was ok though.
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06-01-2011, 01:36 PM #22
Nice work guys!!
www.dpsskis.com
www.point6.com
formerly an ambassador for a few others, but the ski industry is... interesting.
Fukt: a very small amount of snow.
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06-01-2011, 01:48 PM #23
Damn fine work, now one more place I gotta get too.
A good friend would come bail you out of jail. A great friend would be sitting next to you saying..."but damn that was FUN"
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06-01-2011, 02:15 PM #24
Wow - what a great trip! I can agree that capturing the AK range is nearly impossible with a camera. Awesome that you got into Little Swiss - that is high on my rader for rock climbing in late season while the strip still goes, but never thought about skiing.
Really cool stuff!
How did you guys run your rope systems for travel?
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06-01-2011, 02:22 PM #25
Lazily.
I hadn't been in LS for 10 years and a lot of the crevasses are more open, but you can still travel around most of it sans rope without too much issue, roped up for most of the Ruth unless we were way out in the middle of it. When roped we generally were two teams of two on 30-40m lines.
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