Part 2: Padded Room Special Collection Of Junk That More Than Likely Will Be NSFW

[ectreeskier11]

jesus, people should take notes from whoever's doing their marketing. that was hilarious.

[splat]

Why I am now divorced!


Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up on that morning.

I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my husband would be pleasant and say, 'Happy Birthday!', and possibly have a small present for me.

As it turned out, he barely said good morning, let alone ' Happy Birthday.'

I thought....

Well, that's marriage for you, but the kids.... They will remember.

My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast and didn't say a word..
So when I left for the office, I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent.

As I walked into my office, my handsome Boss Rick, said,
'Good Morning, lady, and by the way Happy Birthday ! '
It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered.

I worked until one o'clock , when Rick knocked on my door and said, 'You know,
It's such a beautiful day outside, and it is your Birthday, what do you say we go out to lunch,
just you and me..' I said, 'Thanks, Rick, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. Let's go!'

We went to lunch. But we didn't go where we normally would go.
He chose instead a quiet bistro with a private table. We had two martinis each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.

On the way back to the office, Rick said, 'You know, It's such a beautiful day... We don't need to go straight back to the office, Do We?'

I responded, 'I guess not. What do you have in mind?' He said, 'Let's drop by my place, it's just around the corner.'

After arriving at his house, Rick turned to me and said, If you don't mind, I'm going to step into the bedroom for just a moment. I'll be right back.' 'Ok.' I nervously replied.

He went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes, he came out carrying a huge birthday cake ...
Followed by my husband my kids, and dozens of my friends and co-workers, all singing 'Happy Birthday'.

And I just sat there....

On the couch.....



Naked.

[Ripzalot]

[ass-to-mouth]

oldie but goodie

[f2f]

i love those. check out the holy ghost too:

[brutah]

this just went from mission impossible to mission in-freakin-sanity

[Ubersheist]

this just went from mission impossible to mission in-freakin-sanity

Good lord. So full of cliches and over-the-top inane-ness. Thanks for the warning!

Here's my top 5 things that I won't be doing in the near future:

1. Paying my taxes
2. Strangling a drifter
3. Singing a duet with Perry Como
4. Inventing a new breakfast cereal
5. Watching that movie, which is almost certain to be a flaming pile of crap.

[iscariot]

[That was Pontus]

[splat]

Poached this off a post astralboy put on the main page...

[f2f]

not to be confused with the above, which is a clear WIN!

[Edgnar]

Don't worry, I am professional Russian.

[G]

[brannen]

good god. . ..

[Tippster]

I'm mesmerized....

[f2f]

i'm waiting to see who's going to request this as an avatar first.

[montanaskier]

This is awesome...and the song ROCKS

[TNKen]

Don't worry, I am professional Russian.

Gun is built nearby the house. I have met the guy trying to build and market it, and got to fire the gun. Cool stuff. My Benelli will shoot circles around it speed wise, but I don't have a 20 round drum for it.

[splat]

Good lord. So full of cliches and over-the-top inane-ness. Thanks for the warning!

Here's my top 5 things that I won't be doing in the near future:

1. Paying my taxes
2. Strangling a drifter
3. Singing a duet with Perry Como
4. Inventing a new breakfast cereal
5. Watching that movie, which is almost certain to be a flaming pile of crap.

Not to worry, Ubes, Pretty Woman II will be released in May.

[BmillsSkier]

Who says you can't get a good deal at WalMart?

[That was Pontus]

[Tippster]

Ummm.... speechless:

[brannen]

that 'baby monkey' song is stuck in my head. . . .. . and im ok with it

[PassTheDutchie]

that 'choking on a cock' song is stuck in my head. . . .. . and im not ok with it

[f2f]

for the many fans of broback on this forum: