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Thread: Best Gaper qoute of the weekend?
01-06-2010, 02:43 PM #1576
01-06-2010, 03:10 PM #1577
^^^^^^ That should be on a T shirt !!! Friggin' hilarious !!!"You damn colonials and your herds of tax write off dressage ponies". PNWBrit
01-06-2010, 08:14 PM #1578
me- How are ya today?
him- my back is fucked.
me- what happened?
him- some idiot built the jump wrong. There was a big divot in the landing.
01-06-2010, 08:34 PM #1579Registered User
- Join Date
- Jan 2007
I know it says weekend but I gotta get this one out.
"I want my money back! These conditions are horrible, I never would have come here if I knew it would be this shitty!"
Heinous bitch with the thickest Jersey accent you could imagine after her first run on an 18" powder day. Location: Killington, VT
01-06-2010, 08:41 PM #1580‹^› ‹(•¿•)› ‹^›
01-06-2010, 08:47 PM #1581
This gave me quite the kick. On chairlift with some gaper on 160ish race skis. I'm on 195 motherships.
Gaper: wow, how long are those skis?
Gaper: (laughs) I didn't even know they made skis that long anymore
Me: uhhh yeah
Gaper: I guess all you can do is ski straight down the hill and hope you don't die (laughs)
At that point I just looked away and waited, impatiently, to get off the chair.
01-07-2010, 11:34 PM #1582indentured servant
what's orange and looks good on hippies?
- Join Date
- Dec 2005
rails are for trains
If I had a dollar for every time capitalism was blamed for problems caused by the government I'd be a rich fat film maker in a baseball hat.
01-09-2010, 04:02 PM #1583
Best gondi ride ever for us at KHMR
-2 others join us, one is a skier on what appear to be rentals and the other is a boarder wearing a balaclava
-We are talking about Oakley stuff, and the skier mentions about how he has broken 4 pairs of Juliets.
-Skier goes on to talk about how nice it is to finally be "dusting" off his boots, asks us where we ski; My friend replies: "The steep stuff", to which he says, "how are the moguls?"
friend:"we don't ski the moguls"
skier: "Have you guys skied Euphoria?"
Me: "Where is Euphoria? Which ridge is it off?"
(after looking at a map, I determined that Euphoria just another run on the lower mountain)
My friend was talking about how he launched off a diving board like rock under the gondi, and the skier replies "Oh, you mean Pride rock?"
Dude thought that he was pretty awesome, but then again, so do I for posting this in here
The run before, we came across a group of 12 yr olds with their dads who looked like decent rippers, but they spent 5 minutes trying to get their skis on in the middle of the traverse because it was slightly off camber
01-09-2010, 06:44 PM #1584
I was riding up the lift with a kid the other day and he sees a group of folks traversing. He yells back to his friend on the chair behind us, "look! They must be nordicing or something!!""I just looked down to see if I was wearing my seatbelt, and I'm sitting at my desk in my room."
01-09-2010, 11:54 PM #1585
Not so much a quote, but something I witnessed
The other night I went right from work to ski, so I got ready in the lodge, something you normally can't pay me to do.
As I'm getting my boots on, this typical soccer mom, ya know the type that are typically overly concerned with their kids safety comes in, followed by a troop of about 5 kids. She goes to the bench next to the one I'm on and starts grabbing bags, the kids all basically invade my personal space.
Her one daughter, maybe like 7 or 8 and all decked out in pink, is standing next to her, looking lost on how to start getting ready to go home. The mom, unbuckles the girl's helmet and SLAMS it on the concrete floor and says "now put your helmet away and let's go".
I almost asked the lady if she had any concept of how a helmet worked or if she is just trying to pull her genes from the pool while still looking like she is concerned about her daughter's safety. Instead I just finished getting ready as quick as I could and got the fuck out of there.
01-10-2010, 07:52 AM #1586Registered User
- Join Date
- Dec 2007
- By A Hill Called a MTN on the Ice Coast
a lil background first, so the story makes sense. I drive a 98 jetta with a thule box on top of it.
So on my way home from work this morning I stopped by the local dunk & donuts for a coffee. I get done ordering get my coffee and walk outside, the guy that served me follows me out the door. When we get out the door he says to me.
"You going ice fishing with that boat you got?"
it took me a minute to figure out what boat he was talking about, and why you'd need a boat to ice fish in the first place...but I just said, "nah it holds skis" and walked away dejected with society....
but its good to know that I can multi task with my thule...i'm skipping utah and going to the atlantic this winter to do some fishing
01-10-2010, 08:17 AM #1587
^^ Yeah I drive a jeep cherokee with a thule box on top and I've gotten asked before where I was going kayaking. Took me a while to figure it out also. But the person who asked me didn't work at Dunkin Donuts.Magic Mountain Freeride Team...bringing your grom's game to the next level.
The only ski you'll ever need...http://worthskis.com/skis/the-magic/
"Errare Humanum Est"
01-10-2010, 08:52 AM #1588
waitaminute. How do you ice fish in a boat?
It isn't necessary to imagine the world ending in fire or ice. There are two other possibilities: one is paperwork, and the other is nostalgia.
01-10-2010, 09:07 AM #1589Registered User
- Join Date
- Jan 2008
01-10-2010, 02:55 PM #1590
Gapers on lift notice people skinning up the side of the run
"Look honey - they're totally spider-manning up the mountain"
01-10-2010, 05:09 PM #1591
Guy trying to get on the the tram with snowlerblades being told by patrol he can't go up there with those. "I can do things on these you couldn't even imagine" patroler: "I don't doubt it but I can't let you up there on those"
01-10-2010, 05:49 PM #1592Helldawg Guest
01-10-2010, 07:45 PM #1593
Im not trying to slag easterners with this. but I just saw this status quote from an old aquaintace from facebook.
"Enjoyed three slopes and 1.5 lifts at Alpine Valley today...but skiing in Wisconsin makes me miss Ontario!"
01-10-2010, 07:58 PM #1594
01-11-2010, 06:35 AM #1595Helldawg Guest
01-11-2010, 07:50 AM #1596
Crossing the bridge to get on the chair to blue sky yesterday, medium traffic, moving pretty fast. Guy in front of me does a full hockey stock right in front of the maze entrance causing a very near multi-rider pile-up. I suggest ( a bit salty) a poor place to stop without looking. He says "SKI IN CONTROL" and skates into traffic to get to 17. Hmm...
Took some self control not engage this ass-wipe a bit further.
01-11-2010, 09:21 AM #1597Registered User
- Join Date
- Aug 2006
NSR Ouray Hot springs
So while soaking in the hot pool, a little kid says to his dad while going into the "cooler pool" from the hot pool,
"daddy is this the penis shrinker pool"
01-11-2010, 09:27 AM #1598
At the Beaver Creek lodge:
Me: talking about how Beaver Creek really can't compete on terrain (Steeps, etc.).
Beaver creek ski instructor overhearing me: "Are you kidding me? Have you tried the TALONS CHALLENGE? That's some of the most EXPERT terrain out there!"
Me (rather nonplussed): Dude, it's just a bunch of bump runs.
Instructor: Stammers something about the talons being the HARDEST RACE COURSE IN NORTH AMERICA"Verily, my folly has grown tall in the mountains." - Fredrich Nietzsche, Thus Spoke Zarathustra
01-11-2010, 09:59 AM #1599that's all i can think of, but i'm sure there's something else...
01-11-2010, 10:05 AM #1600
The gf asks "Do you want to go skiing with my friends and I at Big Bear?"
I like getting laid so I quietly laughed under my breath and politely declined....Goals for the season: -Try and pick up a sponsor.--Phill
But whatever scares you most... --Rip'nStick
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