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  1. #51
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    crown of the continent
    Posts
    13,229
    At popular trailhead on Teton Pass yesterday. "ok, so here we go, the transceiver goes under your shell..."
    Something about the wrinkle in your forehead tells me there's a fit about to get thrown
    And I never hear a single word you say when you tell me not to have my fun
    It's the same old shit that I ain't gonna take off anyone.
    and I never had a shortage of people tryin' to warn me about the dangers I pose to myself.

    Patterson Hood of the DBT's

  2. #52
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    sandy, sl,ut
    Posts
    7,805
    Quote Originally Posted by Tye 1on View Post
    At popular trailhead on Teton Pass yesterday. "ok, so here we go, the transceiver goes under your shell..."
    That really is not very funny at all.

    Especially this year.
    __________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ ________________
    "We don't need predator control, we need whiner control. Anyone who complains that "the gummint oughta do sumpin" about the wolves and coyotes should be darted, caged, and released in a more suitable habitat for them, like the middle of Manhattan." - Spats

    "I'm constantly doing things I can't do. Thats how I get to do them." - Pablo Picasso

  3. #53
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    78° 41′ 0″ N, 16° 24′ 0″ E
    Posts
    1,432
    No quotes at all this weekend. Really disappointed by this fact. There were busloads of Danes on the slopes and I was on my new pair of Praxis. (The biggest "mountain" in Denmark is 147metres above sea level, so you can imagine the skiing skills of the average dane...)

    There were however at least five guys on ´toons and a couple of hellbents in the same lift line, so my skis might appear to be pretty normal looking?
    simen@downskis.com DOWN SKIS

  4. #54
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    my own private idaho
    Posts
    2,481
    A snowboarder gal floundering in the deep powder "This sucks! The snow is too thick!"

  5. #55
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Posts
    948
    Two chicks pull up next to us at Berthoud Pass on Saturday. They proceed to get out their snowshoes. The driver asks me, "I see you guys have avalanche gear, do we need to worry about avalanches today?"

    I really wanted to say, "No, avalanches only occur on weekdays."

  6. #56
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    crown of the continent
    Posts
    13,229
    Quote Originally Posted by leroy jenkins View Post
    That really is not very funny at all.

    Especially this year.
    I agree! Missed that it was a funny gaper remark thread.
    Something about the wrinkle in your forehead tells me there's a fit about to get thrown
    And I never hear a single word you say when you tell me not to have my fun
    It's the same old shit that I ain't gonna take off anyone.
    and I never had a shortage of people tryin' to warn me about the dangers I pose to myself.

    Patterson Hood of the DBT's

  7. #57
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    Ten Mile Vistas
    Posts
    3,257
    On the chairlift at Breck:

    Gaper: "I see you got them fat skis(pointing down at my Praxis). Do you live here?"

    Me: "Yeah, I live 15 miles South, just over Hoosier Pass."

    Gaper: "Oh. So you don't really live here then?"

    Me: <silence>
    '09/'10: 69
    '10/'11: 84
    '11/'12: 67
    '12/'13: 65

  8. #58
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    P-Town
    Posts
    223
    Not really a gaper comment, so much as a too much information from your fellow lift passenger. A few weeks ago at Meadows a dirty bird drunk snowboarder was loudly going on to his buddy about how he liked to keep his pubes shaved. The conversation lasted the entire ride.

  9. #59
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    T-town, CO. USA
    Posts
    2,009
    I overheard one tourist say to the other; "This town will pretty nice when they are done with it." Huh? This is a former mining boom town that was founded in 1878!
    Leave No Turn Unstoned!

  10. #60
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Denver, CO
    Posts
    6,874
    Quote Originally Posted by encore View Post
    Two chicks pull up next to us at Berthoud Pass on Saturday. They proceed to get out their snowshoes. The driver asks me, "I see you guys have avalanche gear, do we need to worry about avalanches today?"

    I really wanted to say, "No, avalanches only occur on weekdays."
    Yeah, but were they cute at all?


    No gaperness to report from this past weekend, but was pleasantly subjected to "How you like dem fat skis?" question #137 of the year.




    Oh, not related (as per the quote requirement of the thread), but I did see the most awesomest double ejection at Zuma Bowl on Sunday. Dude goes off about a 15-foot rock. Totally flat landing. Guy lands. Skis remain completely stationary as he flops forward with his lower body practically stationary as well and smacks his face flat on the ground. Hard.
    Last edited by Nick Pappagiorgio; 01-21-2008 at 10:56 AM.

  11. #61
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Folsom, CA
    Posts
    536
    Quote Originally Posted by IrieRon View Post
    Aussie Snowboarder next to me on the lift, motioning to my Praxis (on a recent 24" powder day):

    "So what's the deal with those skis?"

    IrieRon: "Bigger is better?"

    Aussie Snowboarder: "Like when you don't know how to ride a bike and you have training wheels?"

    IrieRon: <silent>
    ^^^this makes me laugh. Thanks
    A good friend would come bail you out of jail. A great friend would be sitting next to you saying..."but damn that was FUN"

  12. #62
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Folsom, CA
    Posts
    536
    On the lift at heavenly friday morning "Dude I think this is like only the 2nd time I've ever skied sober."

    And a minute later something like "If they'd let me just smoke my ghanj I wouldn't have to drink so much in the parking lot in the morning."

    TG420?
    A good friend would come bail you out of jail. A great friend would be sitting next to you saying..."but damn that was FUN"

  13. #63
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Posts
    499
    Solitude on Saturday - Watched from the lift as a guy heads down, clearly out of control. Crashes hard and is laying there in a pile when his buddy skis up to check if he's okay. Texan answers "I got to thinkin' I knew what I was doin'!"

  14. #64
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Salem, MA
    Posts
    1,962
    Not this weekend but this quote will irritate me for a long time.
    I quit basketball my sr. year in HS to ski. so i join the (very casual)ski team having never raced before.
    This turd in a speed suit on the way up a 600 ft slalom run on my first race day looks me up and down and asks "do you ski for bishop fenwick?" as it is written on my bib.
    I say "yeah" looking at my bib and seeing the name and number on it.
    Then i say "looks like we will be racing agianst each other?"
    he then says while shaking his head, "No spyder gear? You obviously dont take your racing that seriously!"
    me -silence
    circa 95-96
    A woman reported to police at 6:30 p.m. that she was being "smart-mouthed."

  15. #65
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    downtown WP
    Posts
    594
    At the coffee shop this am-
    Two women standing in line with ski boots on, getting coffee waiting for shuttle. One woman looks at other and says "I need to get a more comfortable pair of boots to ski in"
    I look down and she has her ski boots on the wrong feet.

  16. #66
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    my own private idaho
    Posts
    2,481
    Quote Originally Posted by montanagirl View Post
    ...
    I look down and she has her ski boots on the wrong feet.

    BWAAAAA haaaa ha

    Did you inform her of her wardrobe malfunction?

  17. #67
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    where bankers breed
    Posts
    25,657
    Quote Originally Posted by leroy jenkins View Post
    ."
    "Oh they have plenty. I don't think any skiers out here can handle N. Carolina's terrain."
    This does apply to the road biking, though. A buddy of mine who lives near Asheville always scoffs at mountain passes in CO.

    Fuck Trump

  18. #68
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    Denver, Co.
    Posts
    1,426
    confirmed Texan at a bar in Steamboat friday:

    "Moguls, are they man made?"

    The matching Spyder jacket and hat threw me off a bit.

    thats the best I got....

  19. #69
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    3
    I was skiing at whistler a couple weeks back and was waiting for the peak chair to open and heard somebody ask a ski instructor the following:

    "Hey what are those booms" (patrol is doing avi work)
    "Oh, they're hunting"
    "...really?"
    "No, I'm just joking its dynamite"
    "They hunt with dynamite!!!"

  20. #70
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    CA
    Posts
    538
    Quote Originally Posted by cmsummit View Post
    On the chairlift at Breck:

    Gaper: "I see you got them fat skis(pointing down at my Praxis). Do you live here?"

    Me: "Yeah, I live 15 miles South, just over Hoosier Pass."

    Gaper: "Oh. So you don't really live here then?"

    Me: <silence>
    Well, he's got a point. You don't live in Breck, do you? You live in Alma.

  21. #71
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    Location
    inglewood, CO
    Posts
    1,040
    Saturday, in a Flail lift line, I mentioned to my buddy that everyone looks alike, red jacket, black pants, black helmet. The 6' 6", 250 pound Nebraska farm boy in front of us, wearing camouflage duck hunting pants, an unzipped jacked over a cotton sweater and a multicolored gaper hat says; " that’s why you have to wear a fancy hat "



    To his credit however he did have duct tape covering a hole in his camo pants, and duct tape = Core.

  22. #72
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    Ten Mile Vistas
    Posts
    3,257
    Quote Originally Posted by Bill.H View Post
    Well, he's got a point. You don't live in Breck, do you? You live in Alma.
    You'll notice that he didn't ask me if I lived in Breck. Most people that ask you if you live "here", are asking if you live in the area. I guess I consider Alma, Silverthorne, Keystone, or Frisco in the area and "here". Out of all the gapers that have asked me this, that was the first time I've gotten that response. I guess I could expect the same from you.
    Last edited by cmsummit; 01-21-2008 at 12:09 PM.
    '09/'10: 69
    '10/'11: 84
    '11/'12: 67
    '12/'13: 65

  23. #73
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    WI
    Posts
    48
    Not this weekend, but Bridger over Christmas.
    "All this _stuff_ makes it so hard to enjoy skiing." Me: double take... what the... turn to see an older couple (50's-60's?) struggling through the fresh to get on the lift. Glad they're getting out there, but I just shook my head and chuckled.

  24. #74
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    WI
    Posts
    48
    Quote Originally Posted by cmsummit View Post
    You'll notice that he didn't ask me if I lived in Breck. Most people that ask you if you live "here", are asking if you live in the area. I guess I consider Alma, Silverthorne, Keystone, or Frisco in the area and "here". Out of all the gapers that have asked me this, that was the first time I've gotten that response. I guess I could expect the same from you.
    Considering I live 1000 miles away... I have to agree, I'd say you live "there".

  25. #75
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Location
    Midwest
    Posts
    263
    Kinda NSR, but a gear head gaper....

    At the gas station, I run inside to ask for the air to be turned on. They have one of those deals where the clerk hits the button inside, and then you have to push the button outside to activate the little compressor. I hurry up and pull my Jeep over just in time to get cut off by this little two door BMW. I hop out and tell they guy "hey, I just had the clerk turn on the air, so...." He replies, "Oh, nice." And proceeds to walk up and snag the air hose. Given that it was about 6 outside, I get back in my Jeep and wait it out. Then it occurs to me that the guy never activates the compressor. He walks around to all four super low profile tires and....fills them up? HA. I got out as he was filling the last tire and I could actually hear the air coming out of his tire

    He doesn't hand me the hose, he just drops it on the ground and takes off.... I hope he is enjoying his almost empty tires somewhere
    "Hurry up and finish your wine so we can go get us some milkshakes"

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