Best Gaper qoute of the weekend?

[raymonster]

Unfortunately I have to quote my friend who was visiting from Dallas. As soon as he said it I could only imagine what the two snowboarders on the chair with us were thinking...

Him: Susan got mad at me for being in the hot tub yesterday. Guess why.

Me: Ummm, because we were in it for an hour and a half?

Him: No, she got mad because she said it will kill all my sperm.

Me: *internal dialog* WTF!

on the same ride up

Him: Looks like someone lost a pole!
Looks like someone lost a glove!

[roadgap]

That's more like it.

And let's all keep in mind--we were all gapers once, and most of us still are. My fondest wish is to find myself quoted in this thread and I promise I won't take offense.

We weren't ALL gapers once. Toddlers are not gapers, they're toddlers.

[keipow]

Who the fuck rents AT gear? That's like renting jet skis and tow boards to the tourists in HI and pointing the way toward Jaws. I hope that shop is donating all the rental money to the local search and rescue group.

Very righteous of you.

Experienced backcountry skiers who decided to travel without AT gear comes to mind. Guided easy ski tours also seems an obvious target.

Dynafit has a demo center in Chamonix, and Black Diamond has a place in La Grave.

Snow mobile tours also frequently move without giving group tourists beacons.

By the way, it would be reasonable for jet ski rental companies to point out where Jaws is to the customer for safety reasons.

[TurxSki]

Nothing funny sorry...

Seriously though, you do need to regularly practice with your (familiar) gear to be truly safe.

...or you could avoid areas where there is a liklehood of avalanche, after reading and understanding that days Avi Report, and just always stay off steep slopes period (Meadow Skipping I guess?) to be "truly safe".
(yep, I'm a JONG)

[MJbumper1121]

We weren't ALL gapers once. Toddlers are not gapers, they're toddlers.

i concur, if their parent's gaper them out, not their fault.

[Lelandjt]

It would be reasonable for jet ski rental companies to point out where Jaws is to the customer for safety reasons.

No one rents jet skis on the North Shore of Maui because it would be dangerous and just plain crazy to send clueless people out into the ocean there (except during a windless summer day). Same reason renting AT and avy gear is dumb. This is different than renting backcountry XC skis. The fact that they're giving them beacons means they know they're going into questionable places. Sure there will be some people using this service who know what they're doing but unless the shop has some sort of filter they're just asking for someone to get lost or buried. It just doesn't seem like a good practice and I bet the Summit County Rescue Group and Sherrif's Office agree. I don't think it's "self righteous" of me to acknowledge that it took me training and practice to be safe in the backcountry and that prospective renters might lack those.

P.S. Oh, and if Jaws is working you don't need it pointed out to you. That's like having to point out a skyscraper in a corn field.

[Downbound Train]

This guy known as "Old Goat" said this...

"My fondest wish is to find myself quoted in this thread and I promise I won't take offense."

Gapper.

[Hugh Conway]

No one rents jet skis on the North Shore of Maui because it would be dangerous and just plain crazy to send clueless people out into the ocean there (except during a windless summer day). Same reason renting AT and avy gear is dumb. This is different than renting backcountry XC skis. The fact that they're giving them beacons means they know they're going into questionable places. Sure there will be some people using this service who know what they're doing but unless the shop has some sort of filter they're just asking for someone to get lost or buried. It just doesn't seem like a good practice and I bet the Summit County Rescue Group and Sherrif's Office agree. I don't think it's "self righteous" of me to acknowledge that it took me training and practice to be safe in the backcountry and that prospective renters might lack those.

Today's gaper quote.

following this logic the only way to enter the thunderdome, err backcountry, would be to buy your own $2k of equipment. Genius.

[Canada1]

And yet I can't think of a death in recent years on rental AT gear?

Most of the people renting this stuff are going out for a walk in the woods where they might experience a 15-20% slope. Not everyone is in the Gnar, or even in the runouts for the gnar.

How would we ever Demo what our next addition to the addiction that is equipement without rental?

[Ice_Coaster]

Riding up a lift a couple weeks ago with a dad and his young son. The dad starts slamming/clacking his skis together and informs his son he should do the same in order to get the snow off the skis so his turning ability wouldn't be affected.

At this point I tried to explain that all they were doing was damaging their boards, and I was met with silence & a blank stare.

[Downbound Train]

Riding up a lift a couple weeks ago with a dad and his young son. The dad starts slamming/clacking his skis together and informs his son he should do the same in order to get the snow off the skis so his turning ability wouldn't be affected.

At this point I tried to explain that all they were doing was damaging their boards, and I was met with silence & a blank stare.

....And then his binding released? Or was I on the chair with a different gaper?

[roadgap]

Today's gaper quote.

following this logic the only way to enter the thunderdome, err backcountry, would be to buy your own $2k of equipment. Genius.

DEATH AT EVERY TURN! DEATH! GRIM, INEVITABLE DEATH!

[catfishjon]

YER GONNA DIE!!!! Seriously though, you do need to regularly practice with your (familiar) gear to be truly safe. Just having the gear is only 50% of your safety protocol. Figuring out how to use that beacon/shovel/probe while in an emergency rescue... is just not cricket!
If you are good enough at using unfamiliar rental gear, then you should not be renting anymore at that point anyway.

Guided operations (heli/snowcat) slap a beacon on you, but don't expect you to be involved in any rescues. They just make sure that you at least know how to switch your beacon off of transmit... and stand aside out of the way of the rescue.

i bring friends that rent gear into the backcountry occasionally. if i have a solid group, i do not mind having one person that is not as experienced in the group. those backcountry guided trips you are talking about have 2 experienced people for every 10 - 12 unexperienced people. i have guided such trips and think that it is much easier with 3 experienced people and one less experienced person. tell me the first time you went into the backcountry you owned every piece of gear you needed. i didnt think so. renting gear is a great way to introduce new people to the sport.

[45hill]

A post from the Mammoth forums. For those that don't know we received 15 feet of snow in the last 12 days.

Is it me or is Mammoth doing a worse job of getting the mountain open after storms? Given that it stopped snowing early during the previous evening you would think that they would have the mountain open a soon as possible given the huge Christmas crowds. This coupled with a total lack of communication as to how long you are likely to stand in line waiting for the lift to open seems to be building a lot of unhappiness and dissatisfaction. I've never heard so much complaining. Why not tell people what is going on.

I have been skiing here for over 40 years and my entire family are charter MVP pass holders. I can remember when the mountain was proud of how fast they would get the montain ready to handle the masses. What's changed????

[DasBlunt]

A post from the Mammoth forums. For those that don't know we received 15 feet of snow in the last 12 days.

Is it me or is Mammoth doing a worse job of getting the mountain open after storms? Given that it stopped snowing early during the previous evening you would think that they would have the mountain open a soon as possible given the huge Christmas crowds. This coupled with a total lack of communication as to how long you are likely to stand in line waiting for the lift to open seems to be building a lot of unhappiness and dissatisfaction. I've never heard so much complaining. Why not tell people what is going on.

I have been skiing here for over 40 years and my entire family are charter MVP pass holders. I can remember when the mountain was proud of how fast they would get the montain ready to handle the masses. What's changed????

This should be gaper quote winner.

[towelie26]

this was heard on the Super Gauge lift at Mary Jane today "are moguls really technical?". I guess I don't really know if being able to ski moguls is "technical", but I sure did feel sorry for the girl when she got off the lift, the group all seemed like they were in high school and she looked like she had been skiing about a half dozen times.

[karpiel]

this was heard on the Super Gauge lift at Mary Jane today "are moguls really technical?". I guess I don't really know if being able to ski moguls is "technical", but I sure did feel sorry for the girl when she got off the lift, the group all seemed like they were in high school and she looked like she had been skiing about a half dozen times.

Gaper how?

[wolfjc18]

Riding up the gondola on the first trip up of the day and blue jacket asks me about my skis:

BJ: Are those skis twin tips?
Me: Yeah, but I'm not too big into riding switch right now.
BJ: They're pretty wide too (100 underfoot). How do you like them?
Me: Really fun for riding pretty much anything from crud to trees to speeding down groomed. Powder is decent, but I have other skis for that.
BJ: Yeah, but how do they do on the cat-tracks?

Damn, I forgot to bring my skis that slay cat-tracks...

[kevok2]

Damn, I forgot to bring my skis that slay cat-tracks...

Those cat tracks can be pretty gnar

[strawjack]

get on the tram. lean my mantras up against the glass. my kids have a bridge and a mini mantra.

guy, 'those don't look like typical cannon skis!?'
me, 'um, ya, um...they are really good in the trees'
guy, 'trees? they look big. can you turn them in the trees?'
me, 'um, ya, they work pretty good. actually its the best ski i've owned for an everyday ski here'
guy, 'ya, but can they turn on snow that is like ice'
me, 'listen dude, they fucking rail ' ...no, i was nice and kept the conversation going...

[Slaag Master]

i miss so much between wearing buds and skiing where there are no lines

[BrianH]

That's more like it.

And let's all keep in mind--we were all gapers once, and most of us still are. My fondest wish is to find myself quoted in this thread and I promise I won't take offense.

DONE!

---------------

At the ski shop:

"These boots aren't right, they're hard to get on and off.

Do they hurt when you ski?

No.

You need to get on your knees and praise the lord then!"

[guroo270]

I saw something today that underscores the fine line between idoiocy and brilliance.

I'd like to meet the driver for a quick interview to determine which it is, although I strongly suspect it's the 1st option. I suppose it is possible that the guy actually thought about this and decided not to drop a couple hundred $ on crossbars.....

As seen in a parking garage at Okemo today:



Whiskey, Tango, Foxtrot?!?!

This is not as bad as the guy I saw in Vail about a month ago. I was by the bus stop waiting for my wife to pick me up, and this guy drove by, skis on the rack, ski rack completely unsecured, bouncing up and down. I really wanted to see him make the sharp right and floor it getting onto I-70, but I'll forever just have to use my imagination. Maybe he went through the roundabout, skis slid off one by one, making huge gouges in his car, then he looped around to see what the fuck happened, and ran over his skis. Yeah, that's what I'll say happened.

[Sessiøn]

From Newschoolers gear trade:

"I'm selling my hellbents because we don't get enough snow in Montana to justify owning these"

[jong_luc_picard]

keystone, co

"i dont keep my new skis in the garage, its too cold."